# NASCAR is fake! I have proof **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Tags:** racing-auto-boat\ **Created:** [November 16, 2001, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747 "2001-11-16T15:37:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/1 "2001-11-16T15:37:55Z")
Please hold all questions and applause until the end of this post. Everyone knows that the moon landings were all faked, each and every one staged at a super secret movie set in downtown Los Angeles. Who faked these “historic” events? **NASA** , that’s who. They generated so much money and publicity off these hoaxes that the high muckity-mucks decided to diversify. But expand where? Think about it - **NASA** , **NASCAR**. **NASA** , **NAS** C **A** R. **NASA** stands for “ **N** ational **A** eronautics and **S** pace **A** dministration”. **NASCAR** ostensibly stands for “ **N** ational **A** ssociation of **S** tock **CA** r **R** acing”. Wait a minute, shouldn’t that be **NASCR**? Why use the extra ‘A’ from ‘Car’? The only organization to make acronyms like that is - the government! **NASA** is a quasi-government agency and as such they would have no qualms about adding the extra ‘A’ to **NASCR** to get **NASCAR** in order to bury their entire acronym in the subsidiary. It’s so simple, once you know the facts. During the next televised race, notice the lighting. The shadows just don’t look right, do they? Of course they don’t. You’re just seeing pictures of technically advanced slot cars racing around a fabricated racetrack IN THE SAME STUDIO WHERE THE MOON WALK WAS FAKED! And how about the rocks? You think every track around the country would have the same rocks around the track apron and infield? Watch carefully and you will see THE SAME ROCK is in THE SAME POSITION ON THE TRACK no matter what track they are SUPPOSEDLY RACING! The idiots thought we wouldn’t notice, but I did. Yes, sir, I noticed. Oh? You say you’ve been to a **NASCAR** race live and in person and saw it with your own eyes? It couldn’t be faked? One word, my friend - holograms. That’s right, **NASA** projects a life sized hologram of the faked race to a different location each week. You heard the roar of the engines? Giant loudspeakers synced to the holographic display. Smelled the gas, oil, and burning rubber? Olifactory illusions created by the masterful holograms and digitally reproduced sounds along with a measured dose of mass hallucination. There are answers to all your concerns, children. You may not like the answers, but the are the cold, hard truth. Why do you think **NASCAR** has an off season? It’s too cold to race cars? Unlikely, compadre. I drive my car in the winter, how about you? No, our friends at **NASA** need this time to write story lines and scripts for the upcoming season. They are by trade technical writers. It takes time (and considerable consultation from the WWF)to translate that into a realistic TV story. I expect, dear friends, now that I have exposed this dirty little secret, that my life is quite worthless. I am expecting at any time to be whisked away on a government spaceship to live forever with Elvis, Hoffa, Ernhart, and the Lindberg baby. Wish for me that I’ll be happy there. My service here is done. ---
**Author:** ![ultress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7c8e57/32.png) [@ultress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultress)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/2 "2001-11-16T15:43:03Z")
Your next assignment, should you decide to accept it, is to oust WWF. ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/3 "2001-11-16T16:42:27Z")
[http://rsd.gsfc.nasa.gov/goes/text/nascar.html](http://rsd.gsfc.nasa.gov/goes/text/nascar.html) ---
**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/4 "2001-11-16T16:47:49Z")
Damn, **racin** , that’s funny! Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![ultrafilter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/3d9bf3/32.png) [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/5 "2001-11-16T17:07:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by racinchikki \* > \*\*[http://rsd.gsfc.nasa.gov/goes/text/nascar.html](http://rsd.gsfc.nasa.gov/goes/text/nascar.html) \*\* Say, wasn’t that originally an Onion article? ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/6 "2001-11-16T17:30:40Z")
And those cars? Cardboard. Lawnmower engines. Trust me. ---
**Author:** ![Cerowyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/82dd89/32.png) [@Cerowyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cerowyn)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/7 "2001-11-16T20:24:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Doctor Jackson \* > **IN THE SAME STUDIO WHERE THE MOON WALK WAS FAKED!** Damn! I knew Michael couldn’t really be doing that. I guess it takes family to let the cat out of the bag, huh? ---
**Author:** ![Kilt-wearin\_man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/82dd89/32.png) [@Kilt-wearin\_man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilt-wearin_man)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/8 "2001-11-16T20:26:32Z")
And if you don’t believe it, just run a Google search for “NASACAR”! Spooky! ---
**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/9 "2001-11-16T20:32:12Z")
So you’re telling me that Dale Earnhardt, Adam Petty, Kenny Irwin, Neil Bonnett, et al. are all still alive, but hiding from us? I mean, it must be true, since it’s all a hologram, right? :rolleyes: Sorry, buddy, no applause from me. Nothing personal, I just can’t find it in my heart to laugh at this. ---
**Author:** ![bdgr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a87d85/32.png) [@bdgr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bdgr)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/10 "2001-11-16T21:03:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ultrafilter \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by racinchikki \* > > \*\*[http://rsd.gsfc.nasa.gov/goes/text/nascar.html](http://rsd.gsfc.nasa.gov/goes/text/nascar.html) \*\* > > Say, wasn’t that originally an Onion article? \*\* Yep. The original had pictures and everything. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/11 "2001-11-16T21:18:29Z")
From Airman Doors, USAF: > [@](#): > > So you’re telling me that Dale Earnhardt, Adam Petty, Kenny Irwin, Neil Bonnett, et al. are all still alive, but hiding from us? I mean, it must be true, since it’s all a hologram, right? > Sorry, buddy, no applause from me. Nothing personal, I just can’t find it in my heart to laugh at this. No offense taken, not to laugh is your prerogative. Yes, I insinuated that Dale Ernhardt (who’s name I mispelled) was still alive, along with Elvis, Jimmy Hoffa and the Lindberg baby. By extension that would include the others you mentioned. All humor has the potential to offend. Kinda like saying “10 eyes and 20 teeth” when referring to a group of country dwelling people in Louisiana. Shrug. We all have our sore spots, sorry if I hit one of yours. ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/12 "2001-11-16T21:24:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*All humor has the potential to offend. Kinda like saying “10 eyes and 20 teeth” when referring to a group of country dwelling people in Louisiana. Shrug. We all have our sore spots, sorry if I hit one of yours. \*\* Hey you Bastard. I am from the Louisiana countryside. Watch it! ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/13 "2001-11-16T21:42:04Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Doctor Jackson \* > Dale Ernhardt (who’s name I mispelled_\* TWICE! ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/14 "2001-11-16T21:55:47Z")
GAAAHHHH! I’m going home. ---
**Author:** ![daveknave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@daveknave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/daveknave)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/15 "2001-11-16T21:57:08Z")
I mean, come on, we all know that NASCAR really stands for Non Athletic Sport centered areoud rednecks (notice just built on them, not implying that everyone who watches is one), so does it really matter if its fake? I would personally like to see it go off the air, but if its gonna take a load of effort to expose this hoax, y not just ignore it? ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2001, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/16 "2001-11-16T22:20:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by racinchikki \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > _Originally posted by Doctor Jackson \* > > Dale Ernhardt (who’s name I mispelled_\* > > TWICE! \*\* He also misspelled “whose” and “misspelled” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2001, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/17 "2001-11-17T01:18:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Doctor Jackson \* > \*\*From Airman Doors, USAF: > > > [@](#): > > > > So you’re telling me that Dale Earnhardt, Adam Petty, Kenny Irwin, Neil Bonnett, et al. are all still alive, but hiding from us? I mean, it must be true, since it’s all a hologram, right? > > Sorry, buddy, no applause from me. Nothing personal, I just can’t find it in my heart to laugh at this. > > No offense taken, not to laugh is your prerogative. Yes, I insinuated that Dale Ernhardt (who’s name I mispelled) was still alive, along with Elvis, Jimmy Hoffa and the Lindberg baby. By extension that would include the others you mentioned. All humor has the potential to offend. Kinda like saying “10 eyes and 20 teeth” when referring to a group of country dwelling people in Louisiana. Shrug. We all have our sore spots, sorry if I hit one of yours. \*\* Touche. ---
**Author:** ![NothingMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b77776/32.png) [@NothingMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NothingMan)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2001, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/18 "2001-11-17T01:39:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by daveknave \* > \*\*I mean, come on, we all know that NASCAR really stands for Non Athletic Sport centered areoud rednecks (notice just built on them, not implying that everyone who watches is one), so does it really matter if its fake? I would personally like to see it go off the air, but if its gonna take a load of effort to expose this hoax, y not just ignore it? \*\* _Whoosh._ ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2001, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/19 "2001-11-17T01:53:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by daveknave \* > I mean, come on, we all know that NASCAR really stands for **Non Athletic** Sport centered **areoud** rednecks (notice just built on them, not implying that everyone who watches is one), so does it really matter if **its** fake? I would personally like to see it go off the air, but if **its** gonna take a load of effort to expose this hoax, **y** not just ignore it? \*\* Yup. Whooosh. And while we’re spell-checking: **Non-Athletic around it’s it’s why** Also, your grammar is atrocious. Also, I highly disagree with your point of view, but choose not to argue with you at the moment. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2001, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747/20 "2001-11-17T01:54:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by racinchikki \* > \*\*[http://rsd.gsfc.nasa.gov/goes/text/nascar.html](http://rsd.gsfc.nasa.gov/goes/text/nascar.html) \*\* And apparently, **someone** at NASA’s got a pretty good sense of humor, since that _is_ NASA’s server that puppy’s on! Maybe some hope for those guys yet. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-is-fake-i-have-proof/93747.md?page=2)