# NASCAR themed Chick Tract **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 3, 2005, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247 "2005-05-03T17:12:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/1 "2005-05-03T17:12:13Z")
I’m not even sure wher to post about the new chick tract any more. Pitting him or starting a GD thread is like an adult beating up little kids for their lunch money, not much of a challenge or satisfaction. Cafe society? That’s being awfully generous about the quality of his “artwork.” Anyhoo, as usual Jack is behind the curve. One would expect Jack to use the new pope to further his Roman Catholic/Nazi/Commie conspiracy but instead Jack gives us a thinly disgused Dale Earnhardt character nickamed “the eliminator” who witnesses to a younger driver. The rookie considers Jesus but his Buddhist wife puts the kibbosh on that. Rookie dies in inevitable crash and is soon standing tall before the man who tells him to get the fuck out of here. I guess this is Jack’s effort to stay topical but it come off kind of flat. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/2 "2005-05-03T17:14:10Z")
You forgot the link. You are SO going to hell. ---
**Author:** ![ErinPuff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dbc845/32.png) [@ErinPuff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ErinPuff)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/3 "2005-05-03T17:15:51Z")
[Here.](http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1022/1022_01.asp) ---
**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/4 "2005-05-03T17:32:22Z")
Meh… I feel that Chick has been phoning it in lately. Where is the hate? The vitrol? The unmitigated anger? He needs to pick up his game. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/5 "2005-05-03T17:42:33Z")
Of _course_ ‘The Kid’ is from California! All of us from there are damned to Hell, what with our Liberal Thinking and all. And ya gots ta watch out fer them Asians! Them an’ their heathen Buddha! :rolleyes: Jesus: ‘You _dare_ practice _love?_ Look, Bucko: When I preached love, I was talking about _me!_ You must love _me_, and not your fellow human beings! To Hell wit’ ya!’ ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/6 "2005-05-03T17:48:54Z")
Yeah, just a dig at “tolerance” vs. the “Truth of Jesus”, and the whole issue of choosing the marriage vs. the conversion should have been worth at least 2 more frames. Well, you can’t keep up a full head of hellfire for 30 years… and anyway I don’t think he’s even scripting them himself any more, and you know what farming it out to staff and apprentices that can do to any piece of work. (BTW, did the moonshiner Grandpaw eventually find Jesus or did he also get the “You’re Fired” in Mr. Faceless’ boardroom?) And hey, Benny-16 has been wearing the white suit less than a month, I’m sure they can get something together about it but it’ll take them some time, specially if they have to redo already-started art for “Little Susie meets a Pervert Priest”. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/7 "2005-05-03T17:50:00Z")
Where’s the overt racism? I am sorely disappointed. It’s obvious that Jack skipped Luke 20:25. Otherwise Grandpa wouldn’t have been arunnin’ from them revenoors! ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/8 "2005-05-03T17:58:17Z")
And naturally Jack overlook’s grandpa’s home business. _And there was thunder, thunder over Thunder Road Thunder was his engine, and white lightning was his load There was moonshine, moonshine to quench the Devil’s thirst The law they swore they’d get him, but the Devil got him first_ ---
**Author:** ![brianjedi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@brianjedi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brianjedi)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/9 "2005-05-03T18:44:19Z")
So wait a minute… Jack Chick just sent Jeff Gordon to hell? ---
**Author:** ![Bruce\_Daddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Bruce\_Daddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bruce_Daddy)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/10 "2005-05-03T19:12:33Z")
Dear God, Please let the 8 team start doing better. I appreciate the bump to the top 10, but need to do better. Also, make Kurt Busch wreck every single race. \<3 LB ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/11 "2005-05-03T19:38:22Z")
What crap. I really think that these threads still need to go in the Pit so we can bitch about how **lame** Chick’s become. Where’s the searing hate? The incredibly twisted logic? Saaaaaaay, I just had a thought! Is there an email addy on Chick’s site? If so, we should start sending Chick emails complaining about how he’s gone soft and that we’ll _never_ be able to convert anyone without the good ole fashioned fire and brimstone Chick tracts, chock full o hate! ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/12 "2005-05-03T19:45:05Z")
You know, if Grandma had put her foot down about this running 'shine business and converted that heathen devil’s brew making Grandpa, the California Kid might have had a chance to grow up and be something worthwhile like a doctor or televangelist cause the Jeff Gordon clone would have never grown up to be a race car driver if he hadn’t had Grandpa’s evil influence. So, it’s all Grandma’s fault. **BURN IN HELL GRANNY!!!** ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Queen\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/13 "2005-05-03T19:58:01Z")
I love how it’s OK to be a moonshiner but not OK to be a racer with ambition. Naturally, the one that needs to be saved is a Californian with a heathen Asian wife. Hie-larious! Does anyone else ever wonder if JTC is putting us on? Like it’s some big sort of joke, on a par with Landover Baptist? I just have such a hard time wrapping my brain around that mentality that I have to wonder if it’s satire. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Lance\_Murdoch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/47e85d/32.png) [@Captain\_Lance\_Murdoch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Lance_Murdoch)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/14 "2005-05-03T20:21:13Z")
I learned that God became a transsexual so we could get to heaven. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/15 "2005-05-03T20:25:54Z")
Meanwhile in the real world, Dale Earnhardt was the one that died and Jeff Gordon is still around winning races and dating models. So I guess that means Buddha kicked Jesus’ ass. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/16 "2005-05-03T20:26:13Z")
Chick is pretty good on his drawings of 40’s and 50’s sedans-perhaps he should stick to that. His street rods are out of proportion-front axles way too wide. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/17 "2005-05-03T20:36:12Z")
Why\* is \*Jesus faceless? I’m getting a creepy vibe here. ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/18 "2005-05-03T20:59:27Z")
Jack Tracts usually end up in the **Pit** , so I’m gonna race it on over there. -SkipMagic ---
**Author:** ![Cagey\_Drifter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b2d939/32.png) [@Cagey\_Drifter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cagey_Drifter)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/19 "2005-05-03T21:25:23Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Where’s the overt racism? I am sorely disappointed. surely you jest. give it another go, it’s hard to miss. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2005, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247/20 "2005-05-03T21:29:30Z")
> [@Cagey Drifter](#): > > surely you jest. give it another go, it’s hard to miss. That’s a lot more subtle than the usual Chick rant. I miss the “Every foreigner is a Satanist Tool” vibe of the older tracts. **Amp** is right…he’s phoning these in. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nascar-themed-chick-tract/302247.md?page=2)