# Nastygram on my car **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 13, 2016, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057 "2016-02-13T22:48:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 6:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/21 "2016-02-14T06:46:27Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > In a busy city like San Francisco, you sometimes have to park two or three or four blocks from your house. That’s just how it goes sometimes. > > If there’s a school or a church or a park or some other institution nearby, there are often extra parking spaces that are not in front of houses, and that become available when people go home after work. I have certainly lived in places where we had to park blocks away sometimes. Now we have a garage for one of the cars (mine) and my spouse is almost always back early in the afternoon, so he can usually find a spot not too far away. If we go out after that, we take my car. It does irritate me how many people on this block have garages but use them for storage of stuff instead of parking a car, and end up parking so that they block the sidewalk. But I try not to judge them. I try. And they almost never get tickets for it, which puzzles me. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/22 "2016-02-14T11:52:22Z")
Seriously? There aren’t clearly delineated lines so you ‘can’t be sure’ whether you were, in fact, taking up two spaces or not? What? If you’re not aware enough to notice you’ve taken up two spaces, delineated or not, then how can you complain when someone points it out to you? (Threats to slash your tires are clearly not cool, you have every right to take offence to that. Just to be clear.) It seems to me, if you cannot, with certainty say you DID not take up two spaces, then you’re not being as aware as you should be when parking. And the note should serve to make you much more aware in future. It reminds me of people who slightly block another’s drive, the parking spot not quite long enough for their car, and when called on it claim, “Oh! Sorry! I didn’t notice!” Guess what? It’s your job to notice! ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/23 "2016-02-14T12:32:42Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > That’s probably it–you parked too far from the edge of the driveway, and somebody wanted to park behind you and there wasn’t room because you were taking up too much room. SF (and the Bay Area in general) have some funny parking conventions–usually you just barely leave enough room for people to get out of their driveway; if there’s any space between your bumper and the curved edge of the driveway, you’re wasting space. > [@gigi](#): > > And that’s worthy of getting your tires slashed?! :eek: Where did anybody say this? mmm ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/24 "2016-02-14T13:31:36Z")
When I lived in philly, I used to meet friends in west philly for coffee. We would sit at a table, people watch, and talk. One morning we saw a guy park right in front of the coffee place in a handicapped spot. He jumped out of his non-placard car and ran across the street. We brainstormed a way-over-the-top wicked note and put it on his windshield. He returned a short time later and we watched him read the note. His pantomimed reactions were hilarious. He looked all around, read the note repeatedly, walked around his vehicle looking for scratches, and made faces. It was so funny that we would occasionally put crazy notes on legally parked cars. If we could have harnessed the creativity that went into those notes, we’d have flying cars today. Good times. ---
**Author:** ![scabpicker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scabpicker/32/8268_2.png) [@scabpicker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scabpicker)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/25 "2016-02-14T14:49:52Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > Still looking to find out how people would react to getting a note like this on their car. Maybe I should do a poll in IMHO and link to this thread. Crumple it up and throw it on the ground. The next time I was in town, I’d look to park there first. If they were really capable of slashing your tires, I bet they wouldn’t have written a note. ---
**Author:** ![doreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/858c86/32.png) [@doreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doreen)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/26 "2016-02-14T16:43:00Z")
> [@elbows](#): > > Seriously? > > There aren’t clearly delineated lines so you ‘can’t be sure’ whether you were, in fact, taking up two spaces or not? > > What? If you’re not aware enough to notice you’ve taken up two spaces, delineated or not, then how can you complain when someone points it out to you? (Threats to slash your tires are clearly not cool, you have every right to take offence to that. Just to be clear.) I would ask if you ever lived in a place where parallel parking is common, but my husband lives in such a place and still can’t see how it’s not immediately obvious. There are a lot of ways that it can appear that a car is taking up more than one space, even when it wasn’t _at the time it was parked._ Most of them involve cars moving- for example, the space between two driveways on my block can fit either three or four cars depending on the size of the cars. Sometimes it appears that a small car in the middle is taking up two spaces - but it could be ( and often is ) that there were three large cars parked earlier, the middle one moved and the small car took that space and then one of the other two cars was replaced by a smaller car leaving the middle car with " half a space in front, half a space behind". Even though it wasn’t that way when it was parked. BTW, I’ve seen delineated spots in some parts of NYC and surrounding suburbs. It doesn’t make things better if parking is at a premium- the spots are long enough to fit an SUV, and when smaller cars are parked in them, you still end up with two cars taking up three spaces. It’s just that you can’t really complain about it. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/27 "2016-02-14T17:28:56Z")
> [@doreen](#): > > I would ask if you ever lived in a place where parallel parking is common, but my husband lives in such a place and still can’t see how it’s not immediately obvious. There are a lot of ways that it can appear that a car is taking up more than one space, even when it wasn’t _at the time it was parked._ Exactly. Sorry, **elbows** , but you’re being a bit unreasonable about this. I am a firm believer that people should in the most considerate way possible. If there are two spots, for example, anyone who parks right in the middle of those two spots so that no other cars can fit is an asshole. But sometimes, an odd confluence of circumstances, with different-sized vehicles coming and going, can make it _ **appear** _ that someone has parked like an asshole when they really didn’t. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/28 "2016-02-14T18:15:41Z")
To be fair to **elbows** , \*\*doreen’s \*\*hypothesis doesn’t apply in this case. First, the street cleaner had just gone by, so there were no other cars parked around there. The area where I parked was between the corner and a driveway, and I was the first one to park there. So it is possible that the space was big enough for two small cars instead of my one small car. Possible, but not certain. Also to be fair to **elbows** , I was a bit flustered trying to find a place to park and get on our way so that we wouldn’t be late, so I wasn’t as careful as I might normally be. Again, I am not yet certain that I was in the wrong. To put myself in the other guy’s place, if I were to leave a note (again, assuming it was appropriate) it would have been more along the lines of “You parked carelessly and took up two spaces. Please don’t be a jerk.” But I tend to avoid cowardly hyperbole. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/29 "2016-02-14T18:16:42Z")
> [@scabpicker](#): > > Crumple it up and throw it on the ground. The next time I was in town, I’d look to park there first. If they were really capable of slashing your tires, I bet they wouldn’t have written a note. Littering is not cool, dude. However, I have no argument with your last sentence. ---
**Author:** ![pidgeon92](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/50afbb/32.png) [@pidgeon92](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pidgeon92)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/30 "2016-02-14T19:23:37Z")
I got a nasty gram last week for a little parking infraction my my gym’s parking lot. It bothered me for a few hours, but I’m over it now. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/31 "2016-02-14T23:11:03Z")
Haters gonna hate. You encountered a hater. Everything you’ve said here shows that you’re a more courteous and conscientious parker than most. Even if you did goof that day, you sprinkle far less evil in the world than the note-writer does. I’d wager 20 to 1 your faux pax was simply not being a resident on “his” street or maybe you parked in “his” space. \*\*\*\* him. He’s already wasted more good people’s brain bytes than he’s worth. I’d file the note away so the next time you do have reason to park in that area and do find our car damaged you have something to give the cops. Not that SFPD will mess with so trivial a problem. Otherwise, put it fully out of your mind. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/32 "2016-02-14T23:29:33Z")
I don’t know. It sounds to me like you were gaming the system. Parking in a neighborhood you have absolutely no affiliation with sounds a little rude to me. Sure that particular neighborhood didn’t have any two hour parking signs up so you didn’t _technically_ do anything wrong, but still, it seems a little weaselly. That said, I am not familiar with SF parking culture, so take the above with a grain of salt. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2016, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/33 "2016-02-14T23:38:46Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Parking in a neighborhood you have absolutely no affiliation with sounds a little rude to me. This is absolutely asinine. You understand, i assume, that people who live in large cities often have to travel outside of the neighborhood where they live in order to conduct business, socialize, visit friends and family, and do all of those other pesky little things that make up our daily lives? Do you believe that such people should be forbidden from driving to their destinations? ---
**Author:** ![Claverhouse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/13edae/32.png) [@Claverhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Claverhouse)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2016, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/34 "2016-02-15T01:19:31Z")
_The Malice of the Unworthy is more to be prized than precious vellum or a bolt of fine silk._ Or some such — probably either Saki or Kai Lung. Instant discourteous hostility is the province of the aggressive old misery-guts: dwelling on the matter only diminishes your life, since the thing is no more important than the life of the creature who acted in the foolish way such tools must. One may easily be shaken by such crudity, but thinking about these matters only encourages depression. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2016, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/35 "2016-02-15T01:51:21Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > I don’t know. It sounds to me like you were gaming the system. Parking in a neighborhood you have absolutely no affiliation with sounds a little rude to me. Sure that particular neighborhood didn’t have any two hour parking signs up so you didn’t _technically_ do anything wrong, but still, it seems a little weaselly. > > That said, I am not familiar with SF parking culture, so take the above with a grain of salt. Wait, what? If you’re only allowed to park your car in your own neighborhood, it kind of defeats the purpose of cars as transportation. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2016, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/36 "2016-02-15T01:51:27Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > This is absolutely asinine. > > You understand, i assume, that people who live in large cities often have to travel outside of the neighborhood where they live in order to conduct business, socialize, visit friends and family, and do all of those other pesky little things that make up our daily lives? > > Do you believe that such people should be forbidden from driving to their destinations? Parking in front of some strangers house seems rude to me. Parking in a parking lot, not so much. ---
**Author:** ![scabpicker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scabpicker/32/8268_2.png) [@scabpicker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scabpicker)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2016, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/37 "2016-02-15T02:02:37Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > Littering is not cool, dude. However, I have no argument with your last sentence. I understand that littering isn’t the thing to do, but I’d be fighting the urge to piss on the note. I can’t stand people who appoint themselves the enforcers. > [@Grrr](#): > > Parking in front of some strangers house seems rude to me. Parking in a parking lot, not so much. Maybe it’s rude in some bizarre burb out there, but you don’t own the curb in front of your house, and it’s rude to presume you do. Generally anyone can park there, provided they’re not blocking access to your driveway. I have had people who were parked in front of my driveway towed (hey, I had to leave for work). If you doubt it, call the local parking enforcement and see what they say. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2016, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/38 "2016-02-15T02:04:59Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Parking in front of some strangers house seems rude to me. Parking in a parking lot, not so much. Do you believe that you own the street in front of your house? It might also surprise you to know that, in heavily built-up cities, many neighborhoods contain no parking lots at all. Not everyone lives at the mall, you know. ---
**Author:** ![doreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/858c86/32.png) [@doreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doreen)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2016, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/39 "2016-02-15T02:09:42Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Parking in front of some strangers house seems rude to me. Parking in a parking lot, not so much. So tell me, do all your friends and relatives have a parking lot close by? Because mine don’t. Neither do my doctor or dentist or most other places I go. Oh, and for the most part, the doctor and dentists offices, and many of the stores have apartments above them, so even if I park directly in front of my destination, I’m still parking in front of someone’s home. Residential areas in cities don’t tend to have public parking lots - you’ll find them only in the more commercial areas. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2016, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057/40 "2016-02-15T02:36:14Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > Do you believe that you own the street in front of your house? > > It might also surprise you to know that, in heavily built-up cities, many neighborhoods contain no parking lots at all. Not everyone lives at the mall, you know. > [@doreen](#): > > So tell me, do all your friends and relatives have a parking lot close by? Because mine don’t. Neither do my doctor or dentist or most other places I go. Oh, and for the most part, the doctor and dentists offices, and many of the stores have apartments above them, so even if I park directly in front of my destination, I’m still parking in front of someone’s home. > > Residential areas in cities don’t tend to have public parking lots - you’ll find them only in the more commercial areas. As I said in my OP, I am not familiar with SF culture. So obviously from your responses, I don’t know what I’m talking about. That said, parking in front of a strangers house because you’re visiting their neighbor is one thing. But just parking in front of some strangers house so you can go on a road trip with your buddy seems rude. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nastygram-on-my-car/746057.md?page=3)