# Need $100,000 fast. Any suggestions? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 8, 2008, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667 "2008-01-08T00:33:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/21 "2008-01-08T01:28:23Z")
[QUOTE=Winston Smith] Like what? I think the only thing I could spare would be a single kidney, and that’s barely enough for an appetizer. [/QUOTE] “She should quit! But not because of me. She should be like everyone else, and deal with years of humiliation and heartbreak, before being spit out the bottom of the porn industry”. -_Seinfeld_ ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/22 "2008-01-08T01:29:18Z")
[QUOTE=Winston Smith] Safe? [/QUOTE] I cannot even think of an unsafe legal way to earn that much in only two months. Borrowing is the only reasonable way. I suppose you could try to get on some silly game show as long as you don’t really need the money and are just hoping to do something with it. As you know few people win 100K+ on game shows, but at least that is smarter than trying to win by gambling or illegal means. Are you Smarter then a 5th grader? Is Fear Factor still on? Jim ---
**Author:** ![Jean\_Gray](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jean\_Gray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jean_Gray)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/23 "2008-01-08T01:30:04Z")
If you can break into the vault at the Bellagio, you’re golden. In which case, could you spare a couple hundred k for me? ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/24 "2008-01-08T01:31:54Z")
A few of my patients have at least transiently been able to lay hands on such sizeable amounts in short order. I’ll make some discreet inquiries and get back to you. BTW, just how risk-averse are you? And are you allergic to lead? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/25 "2008-01-08T01:32:40Z")
[QUOTE=Winston Smith] Safe? [/QUOTE] Futures dealing in currency is legal, potentially profitable and distinctly unsafe: Futures provide an innovative array of investment tools that can help a portfolio perform in the hands of an astute investor. Speculators can also use these tools to seek the huge gains that this highly geared market provides. High potential gains usually bear high risks. Just as the leverage of the market can enormously magnify the profits, so it also magnifies the losses. > **[LOG IN - SHARENET - Your Key To Investing on The JSE Securities Exchange -...](https://www.sharenet.co.za/login.phtml?href=www.sharenet.co.za%2Ffree%2Flibrary%2Ffu_01.htm)** > > Sharenet provides financial information and services for investors on The JSE Securities Exchange and other South African markets including online share trading, real-time streaming quotes, graphs, news, fundamentals, portfolios, watch lists, Unit... ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/26 "2008-01-08T01:34:34Z")
[QUOTE=silenus] The key term here is _earn_. If you don’t get hung up on this one word, a whole universe of possibilities opens up. [/QUOTE] Who says I’m hung up about what, now? ---
**Author:** ![Sal\_Ammoniac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8dc957/32.png) [@Sal\_Ammoniac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sal_Ammoniac)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/27 "2008-01-08T01:34:37Z")
Look, go get a bunch of new credit cards, and take out cash advances. This is not that hard, people! ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/28 "2008-01-08T01:36:17Z")
Porn! That’s the answer. Shoot (heh) an assload (heh) of porn movies at night for a couple of months. They’re probably good for a few hundred a piece, right? Then you just need to do 250 at 400 dollars a piece, which only means a little over 4/day. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/29 "2008-01-08T01:36:38Z")
[QUOTE=Qadgop the Mercotan] A few of my patients have at least transiently been able to lay hands on such sizeable amounts in short order. I’ll make some discreet inquiries and get back to you. BTW, just how risk-averse are you? And are you allergic to lead? 😉 [/QUOTE] I’m solid. Totally. No worries about any of that stuff. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/30 "2008-01-08T01:36:39Z")
What do you need the money for? ---
**Author:** ![Aioua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@Aioua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aioua)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/31 "2008-01-08T01:37:58Z")
What do you want to do with the money? It’s alot easier if you’re skipping the country afterwards. Not nearly so many feds on your tail. I’m thinking kidnapping and extortion. Do you have an unmarked van? ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/32 "2008-01-08T01:40:02Z")
[QUOTE=ivylass] What do you need the money for? [/QUOTE] That’s _my_ business. Hah. Just kidding. I want to “pay off” some “debt” that I’ve “incurred”. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/33 "2008-01-08T01:41:31Z")
[QUOTE=Aioua] What do you want to do with the money? It’s alot easier if you’re skipping the country afterwards. Not nearly so many feds on your tail. I’m thinking kidnapping and extortion. Do you have an unmarked van? [/QUOTE] II don’t have an unmarked van, but I do have a 2002 Ford Taurus sedan (silver). It’s almost literally invisible. ---
**Author:** ![Ludy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Ludy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludy)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/34 "2008-01-08T01:41:44Z")
Go on a game show, kick some butt, and volia money to spare. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/35 "2008-01-08T01:43:18Z")
[QUOTE=ivylass] What do you need the money for? [/QUOTE] The hints are all there. > [@Winston Smith](#): > > I need the money pretty quick - a month or two, tops. Borrowing is out, out, out. And ixnay on the 401k raid. It’s obvious. He’s a politician being blackmailed by a gay lover, and needs to pay him off before the Super Tuesday primaries. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/36 "2008-01-08T01:43:28Z")
[QUOTE=Winston Smith] I want to “pay off” some “debt” that I’ve “incurred”. [/QUOTE] And these “people” won’t take “payments?” What the hell did you do? ---
**Author:** ![Hanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b3f665/32.png) [@Hanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hanna)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/37 "2008-01-08T01:45:23Z")
Could you become a man whore? ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/38 "2008-01-08T01:45:56Z")
[QUOTE=ivylass] And these “people” won’t take “payments?” What the hell did you do? [/QUOTE] I don’t really want to get into it. Let’s just say I’m planning on “voting republican”. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/39 "2008-01-08T01:46:13Z")
Start a website and ask for money so you don’t have to kill your dog and cat, and your SO can afford not to have an abortion. And auction off a piece of pizza that looks just like the Virgin Mary would look if she had terrible acne. Sell prayers for $50 a pop. Um… do you have a sister? ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2008, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667/40 "2008-01-08T01:47:10Z")
[QUOTE=Boscibo] Could you become a man whore? [/QUOTE] Are you saying I could get women to _pay_ to have _sex_ with me??? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-100-000-fast-any-suggestions/432667.md?page=3)