# Need advice on going down on gf **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 12, 2003, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014 "2003-07-12T18:21:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Blonde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Blonde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blonde)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/21 "2003-07-14T02:50:23Z")
Venus Flytrap. ---
**Author:** ![sweet\_contradiction](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ea924/32.png) [@sweet\_contradiction](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sweet_contradiction)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/22 "2003-07-14T15:12:10Z")
Yeah…exactly what Giraffe said!! _sweet sweet sigh_ i gotta get me a giraffe! ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/23 "2003-07-14T22:54:48Z")
**sweet contradiction** , maybe try wearing an acacia leaf g-string? 😉 I notice that we haven’t heard much out of the OP in a while. Cat got your tongue? ---
**Author:** ![chestnutmare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d6d6ee/32.png) [@chestnutmare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chestnutmare)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2003, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/24 "2003-07-14T23:06:18Z")
**Giraffe** How _you_ doin? ---
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2003, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/25 "2003-07-15T01:01:17Z")
Sometimes I start at the feet. Every woman is different. The important thing is that you want to please her. ---
**Author:** ![Atlantis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de0a6/32.png) [@Atlantis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atlantis)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2003, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/26 "2003-07-15T01:22:57Z")
Somehow, I don’t think that the _cat_ has the OP’s tongue… ---
**Author:** ![HideoHo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3ec8ea/32.png) [@HideoHo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HideoHo)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2003, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/27 "2003-07-15T01:23:15Z")
I thought I’d offer a practical note into this. The first few times you do this with anyone, the taste will most likely be something you’re not expecting. It may not be bad, it may be bad, it most likely won’t be good the first time. Eventually, you’ll start thinking of it as good, but you definitely do not want to stop after your first lick and go “Ewwwwwwiiiieeeeeee!” My suggestion is to slip a single Listerine Mint Strip onto your tongue about 60 seconds or so before you start doing the deed. It’ll make sure the taste isn’t as strong and it gives your tongue and good tingly feeling for her. As a note, from experience when having it happen the other way, MAKE SURE THE STRIP IS DISSOLVED FOR AT LEAST 60 SECONDS BEFORE LICKING!!! No one likes curling into the fetal position with their private bits on fire. That is all I’ll say about the burning… oh the burning… it hurtses. _We hates the trixy stripses._ As for technique, go for whatever, try a few things, see how she reacts. Mostly, be enthusiastic. Moan, hum, make sure she knows that you like doing it. If it works on you when she’s doing the same, then it’ll work on her. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2003, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/28 "2003-07-15T16:13:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by chestnutmare \* > \*\ ***Giraffe** How _you_ doin? \*\* 😉 You know, when I posted I realized that I was in danger of getting flirted with. But damnit, the boy needs our help! Consequences be damned! Such are the sacrifices I make to help my fellow man. :: cue inspirational music :: ---
**Author:** ![CrazyMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ee59a6/32.png) [@CrazyMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyMonkey)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2003, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/29 "2003-07-15T23:58:15Z")
Step 1. Do everything everybody said above. Step 2. When she starts getting into it, she will probably close your eyes. This is you opportunity to pull out the surprise you cleverly concealed under the bed earlier that day: a mousetrap! Attach the mousetrap to your tongue, being sure it makes an audible snapping sound. Step 3. Jump up, flip on the lights, and start yelling. “Oww! How the hell did that get in there!” Hilarity is sure to ensue. ---
**Author:** ![chestnutmare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d6d6ee/32.png) [@chestnutmare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chestnutmare)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2003, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/30 "2003-07-16T01:16:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Giraffe \* > \*\*😉 > > You know, when I posted I realized that I was in danger of getting flirted with. But damnit, the boy needs our help! Consequences be damned! Such are the sacrifices I make to help my fellow man. > > :: cue inspirational music :: \*\* Giraffe - That was more than just flirtation 😉 Are you coming to the DC metro area anytime soon 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2003, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/31 "2003-07-16T03:33:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by chestnutmare \* > \*\*Giraffe - That was more than just flirtation 😉 Are you coming to the DC metro area anytime soon 😃 \*\* A proposition?! Nice! But alas, my wife won’t let me cross the country to perform oral sex on women I meet over the Internet. She’s sort of a shrew that way. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2003, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/32 "2003-07-16T03:41:11Z")
What if **chestutmare** were independently wealthy, and offered you $1 million dollars to take that prehensile tongue for a ride for one night? (excuse me, I have to go write a movie treatment…) ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2003, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/33 "2003-07-16T04:52:01Z")
Definitely do NOT just start going at it really hard and fast when you realize she’s about to climax. GRADUALLY Increase pressure and/or speed. Some women are very sensitive and a hard sudden pressure, even with something as soft as your tongue can stop a marvelous orgasm in it’s tracks with sort of an “ouch, too much” effect, and make her have to start over at ground zero. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2003, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/34 "2003-07-16T05:16:27Z")
Dude… rule #1, enjoy it, and make sure she knows you’re enjoying it… rule #2- if all else fails, keep altoids handy 😉 rule #3- never ever ever think of cheesecake rule #4- if you must use an alphabet, try and learn Mandarin- lots more characters to play with… rule #5- don’t expect her to come. If she does, she does, and if she doesn’t… well, she’ll tell all her friends you’re hopeless and you’ll have cottonmouth for nothing. And most important of all- DO NOT ASK if you can put peanut butter on there first. Atlantis- I think the point may be precisely that “the cat” has his tongue 😉 ---
**Author:** ![LauraLittlePony](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e19adc/32.png) [@LauraLittlePony](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LauraLittlePony)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2003, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/35 "2003-07-16T06:23:50Z")
Well personally, I prefer for the clitoris to be approached from the bottom. . . that way it’s less direct and you can work your way upwards gradually. Though I guess I’m not the person you’d want to ask; I’ve never thought that I give very good head. If I do, I think it’s only by comparison to all the people who give really bad head. If only you could test things out on yourself. . . ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2003, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/36 "2003-07-16T16:09:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Casey1505 \* > \*\*What if **chestutmare** were independently wealthy, and offered you $1 million dollars to take that prehensile tongue for a ride for one night? > \*\* \ How much sex would be involved? (menacing) Because if it’s _some_… \ ---
**Author:** ![chestnutmare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d6d6ee/32.png) [@chestnutmare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chestnutmare)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2003, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/37 "2003-07-16T16:37:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Giraffe \* > \*\*\ > How much sex would be involved? > (menacing) Because if it’s _some_… > \ \*\* At this point… 😃 Oh who am I kidding, I am far from independtly wealthy so it is a moot point. Although… I do give as good as I get 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2003, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/38 "2003-07-16T16:55:20Z")
::beating head off of desk, remembering the young and carefree days before marriage and child:: ---
**Author:** ![chewbasta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bbe5ce/32.png) [@chewbasta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chewbasta)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2003, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/39 "2003-07-16T17:31:08Z")
A slow go down, dont forget the tummy and thighs, when at the “fish” massage the inner thighs and rub on her a little, I do this before sex, just so she comes too and I ain’t in no trouble… ---
**Author:** ![fotosbyfrank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/54ee81/32.png) [@fotosbyfrank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fotosbyfrank)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2003, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014/40 "2003-07-16T17:31:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Casey1505 \* > **Somewhere, I heard the suggestion to trace the alphabet. That seemes to work for me. But don’t do it in order. Pick six letters in a row, then go to another part of the alphabet, or use QWERTY as a guide if you know it. Otherwise, she’s going to know.** If she knows that you’re tracing the alphabet, then you aren’t doing it right! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-advice-on-going-down-on-gf/188014.md?page=3)