# Need, umm . . . Scooby-Doo help . . . **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 12, 2000, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940 "2000-04-12T13:59:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/61 "2000-04-14T20:34:00Z")
Spokes, I still awake up with Clutch Cargo nightmares—yikes! Those dead-still faces, looming up on the set, with those blackened, zombie-like moving lips . . . ---
**Author:** ![SoMoMom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/41988e/32.png) [@SoMoMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SoMoMom)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2000, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/62 "2000-04-14T21:38:00Z")
Because of this thread, I had to stop on the Cartoon Network when I was surfing past. They were in the middle of a chase scene. I forgot about that chase scene music. Now it’s stuck in my head! ---
**Author:** ![Kepi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kepi/32/7251_2.png) [@Kepi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kepi)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2000, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/63 "2000-08-16T02:54:03Z")
Sorry to bump this after such a long time, but I just read Eve’s column in Movieline today. She included lots of the info here and even gave props to the “Teeming Millions”. Just wanted to say that I loved it Eve. I might even get a subscription, if only to read your column. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2000, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/64 "2000-08-16T14:39:32Z")
“Just wanted to say that I loved it Eve. I might even get a subscription, if only to read your column.” Darling, is there any OTHER reason to subscribe to Movieline? Glad you liked the column, though it was much funnier before my editor applied Humor-B-Gone to it. The Sept. issue has a Nancy Sinatra column, and I managed to work in Ukulele Ike’s and my arguement about which was Evelyn Waugh’s best book. And I did just work in a reference to Wally in the Jan/Feb column, which I just finished . . . ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2000, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/65 "2000-08-16T16:30:56Z")
The Jan/Feb column? Is someone a little too on the proactive side of things? Also, I’ll send you gifts if you put my name in a column. I’ll send you expensive gifts if you put my name in the title of a column. I’ll bring you the rest of Rudolph Valentino’s worldly possessions if you put a picture of me in your column. ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2000, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/66 "2000-08-16T16:37:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eve \* > \*\*“That was the worst cartoon ever!” > > Two words—“Clutch Cargo.” > > \*\* Maybe so, but postmodern enough to include in _Pulp Fiction_. But what can you say about a director that uses his own treasured cereal boxes as props. ---
**Author:** ![robinh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b77776/32.png) [@robinh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robinh)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2000, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/67 "2000-08-16T18:09:43Z")
Scooby-Doo has indeed made a frightening comeback. My 5 year old has recently been drawn into its web. Grown-ups with fond memories of Scooby-Doo should see the South Park episode where Korn solves a mystery a la Scooby and the gang. There are all sorts of classic Scooby-Doo plot references. _After playing our instruments, there’s nothing we like better than solving a groovy mystery_, followed by the lose-your-glasses-and-accidentally-touch-the-monster scene, finishing up with _…and using a squirrel and a flashlight he created the pirate ship…_ It’s really very funny. Now, if I could only edit out the necrophilia references in the side plot I could let my older daughter see it. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/68 "2000-08-17T00:31:24Z")
Note on The Redhead: Daphne’s family is _rich_. Therefore, everybody puts up with her, cause she’s picking up the check. ---
**Author:** ![Kepi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kepi/32/7251_2.png) [@Kepi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kepi)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/69 "2000-08-17T03:19:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mullinator \* > Also, I’ll send you gifts if you put my name in a column. I’ll send you expensive gifts if you put my name in the title of a column. I’ll bring you the rest of Rudolph Valentino’s worldly possessions if you put a picture of me in your column. I’ll see Mully’s Valentino ante and raise you a couple of Gish sisters. You know, Eve. This could become much more lucrative than the writing gig alone! BTW, I went ahead and ordered a subscription. No more reading it for free at Barnes & Noble. Tell them you expect a raise of at least $9.95 due to my subscription. ---
**Author:** ![Kepi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kepi/32/7251_2.png) [@Kepi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kepi)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/70 "2000-08-17T03:43:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eve \* > Glad you liked the column, though it was much funnier before my editor applied Humor-B-Gone to it. Eve, is it possible for us to read some of your past columns as they were before they were treated with Humor-B-Gone®? It would be like reading Scott Fitzgerald’s manuscript for _The Great Gatsby_ before Maxwell Perkins got a hold of it. ---
**Author:** ![SilentKnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8e8cbc/32.png) [@SilentKnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SilentKnight)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/71 "2000-08-17T03:46:14Z")
[http://www.cdc.net/~drjekyll/scooby/darkside/](http://www.cdc.net/~drjekyll/scooby/darkside/)😃 ---
**Author:** ![Kepi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kepi/32/7251_2.png) [@Kepi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kepi)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/72 "2000-08-17T17:38:37Z")
Just bumping this to improve my chances of getting mentioned in Eve’s column. Eve, dear, I think you should drop the APB fellow. You know I still love you. ---
**Author:** ![Dylan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e95f7d/32.png) [@Dylan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dylan)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/73 "2000-08-18T04:28:59Z")
I’m watching it right now…I kid you not… the vampire has just chased the kids…Shaggy and Scooby-Doo and Fred have seperated from Daphne and Velma… They are escaping by jumping into the coffin which obviously leads to a secret staircase…the chase is on!!! Daphne is hearing bells…twit…ahhhh…Velma is thinking…she’s onto something!!..the plan is in place…much more intricate and involved than it needs to be, of course…oh my god!!!the vampire just jumped in the room…he’s chasing them through millions of doors…but they all look the same!! however will they find each other and escape this evil demon???..they went to commercial…I have to stop typing this…I have to know how it turns out… ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/74 "2000-08-18T14:35:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kepi \* > \*\*[It would be like reading Scott Fitzgerald’s manuscript for _The Great Gatsby_ before Maxwell Perkins got a hold of it. \*\* HEY! The point of editing is to IMPROVE the work, not to destroy it. I was having a four-martini lunch with **Eve’s** editor the other day, and he confided to me that he considered it a civic service to delete the funny bits. Otherwise MOVIELINE readers would be publicly expiring from laughter, like in that Monty Python sketch. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/75 "2000-08-18T15:03:25Z")
“Eve, is it possible for us to read some of your past columns as they were before they were treated with Humor-B-Gone®?” —Hmm. What you might do is E-mail [movieline.com](http://movieline.com) and ask them why my Bottom Shelf column is not on their Web site . . . I guess I could tell you which jokes were cut, but if I started printing out entire columns, I think their lawyers would be on my case. I do get annoyed when their idea of “cutting for length” is just eliminating the punchline to make the jokes shorter. Upcoming columns: Bewitched (Oct. issue) Windy Dink and You (Nov. issue) “Doilies Make the Difference!” (Dec. issue) Body Calipers (Jan/Feb issue) ---
**Author:** ![Kepi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kepi/32/7251_2.png) [@Kepi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kepi)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/76 "2000-08-18T15:10:10Z")
A thousand pardons, Ike! I didn’t mean to disparage your life’s work. Oh no, no, no! What I meant was, I would find it extremely interesting to see what was originally written, and then compare it to what was eventually published. You know, just to give it the academic treatment and such. I mean, for all I know, Eve may be some hack in dire need of a good editor. ( **Eve** , dear. Don’t get me wrong. _I_ know you’re brilliant. Just trying to soothe Ike here. Do you still love me?) ---
**Author:** ![Ivar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ivar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ivar)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940/77 "2000-08-18T15:27:17Z")
What about all the weird Aunts and Uncles that they were visiting. And they didn’t just travel around the U.S. I seem to remember them driving the Mystery Machine in China. Am I wrong? The first two seasons, 26 episodes in all, were the original and best. Scrappy was a piece of shit character created in a pathetic attempt to rekindle interest in the show in the late 70’s. There was also a series that only had Daphne, Shaggy and Scooby, I don’t remember what it was called. On another note, I went to Halloween last year as Freddie. When people asked where Daphne was I’d tell them she was out in the Mystery Machine getting it on with Velma. * * * It’s not the heat, it’s the stupidity. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/need-umm-scooby-doo-help/15940.md?page=3)