# Nerdy, Geeky Jokes **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 25, 2022, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532 "2022-11-25T15:23:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2022, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/181 "2022-12-24T17:05:19Z")
[![](https://i.imgur.com/rzbKSx7.jpg) ](https://i.imgur.com/rzbKSx7.jpg) Not a repeat, I hope. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2022, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/182 "2022-12-24T17:19:51Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > How do you ruin **King Kong** for a cognitive psychologist? > > Have him count the number of times the basketball is tossed. I haven’t seen King Kong in any of its iterations, so this has gone right over my head. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2022, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/183 "2022-12-24T17:22:49Z")
That’s not the reference you’re missing for that joke. You already know everything you need to know about King Kong. And @kayaker , I don’t get the chloroplast. I’m guessing that “cell” is the rhyme for “hell”, but I don’t know what the rest of the line is. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2022, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/184 "2022-12-24T17:22:57Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > Fluorine > Uranium > Carbon > Potassium Oh, that’s GOOD. I’m sorry I missed this thread in November. ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2022, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/185 "2022-12-24T17:30:05Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > > [@CalMeacham](#): > > > > How do you ruin **King Kong** for a cognitive psychologist? > > > > Have him count the number of times the basketball is tossed. > > I haven’t seen King Kong in any of its iterations, so this has gone right over my head. The joke references this video. It’s pretty cool, worth a look, which is why I’m committing the slight breach of SDMB etiquette of posting a YouTube video. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/vJG698U2Mvo/hqdefault.jpg "selective attention test") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJG698U2Mvo) ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2022, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/186 "2022-12-24T20:02:10Z")
Thank you! I saw this video years ago and I never thought of it in connection. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2022, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/187 "2022-12-24T20:09:59Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > I’m guessing that “cell” is the rhyme for “hell”, but I don’t know what the rest of the line is. “The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.” Biochemistry is my degree. I knew the instant I saw it. ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2022, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/188 "2022-12-25T00:03:55Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > “You must never do that again! Because if you commute with the Hamiltonian, you’ll never evolve!” Groan! ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2022, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/189 "2022-12-25T02:11:28Z")
I still don’t get either the rose joke or the Hamiltonian one. ---
**Author:** ![Al128](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/al128/32/16541_2.png) [@Al128](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Al128)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2022, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/190 "2022-12-25T12:21:00Z")
A priest, a Rabbi and a dyslexic guy walk into a bra. ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2022, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/191 "2022-12-25T15:26:19Z")
> [@Monty](#): > > I still don’t get either the rose joke or the Hamiltonian one Oh, good, it’s not just me. ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2022, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/192 "2022-12-25T15:32:13Z")
The “Rose” one isn’t really joke, it’s a rhyme. Roses are Red, It’s hot as Hell, The mitochondria are the powerhouse of the cell. As for the Hamiltonian one, it’s really, really geeky. I don’t understand it enough to explain it in simple terms: > ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2022, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/193 "2022-12-25T17:25:08Z")
> [@beowulff](#): > > The mitochondria are the powerhouse of the cell. Heh, must just be me. The first time I saw that joke it seemed super obvious. Every cell-bio class I ever had, every science text book ever written, seems to pair a similar picture with the exact same caption. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2022, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/194 "2022-12-26T02:21:14Z")
> [@beowulff](#): > > I don’t understand it enough to explain it in simple terms: Thank you for that, I guess. I think my mind is broken. ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2022, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/195 "2022-12-26T19:43:13Z")
How can you tell the difference between an auto worker and a physicist? Ask her to pronounce “unionized”. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2022, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/196 "2022-12-26T20:12:05Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > “The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.” I did actually think that, but then I thought “No, that can’t be a mitochondria; it’s green. It must be a chloroplast.”. As for the Hamiltonian one… In quantum mechanics, everything about a system that can be measured corresponds to some mathematical operator you can perform on the state of a system, and those operators usually leave the system changed. Sometimes, two operators will commute: That is to say, you can perform them both, in either order, and either way, the result will be the same (this is the same meaning of “commute” that you encountered in elementary school, when they talked about the “commutative property of addition”, A+B=B+A). For instance, you can measure the X component of a particle’s position, and then measure the Y component, or you can do Y first and then X, and either way, the result will be the same. More often, however, two operators will not commute. If, for instance, you measure the X component of position for a particle, and then measure the X component of momentum, that’s different than measuring momentum and then position. This is why we say that you can’t know both the position and momentum of a particle at the same time. In such cases, there’s a little mathematical construct called the “commutater”, that describes just how different it is to do the two operations in the other order: It’s the result of doing P and then Q, minus the result of doing Q and then P. In particular, the operator corresponding to measuring the energy of a system (called the “Hamiltonian operator”) tells you how other measurables change in time: The commutator of some other observable with the Hamiltonian is how that other observable changes. Which means that if you have some measurable property that commutes with the Hamiltonian (you can measure that property and then energy, or the other way around, and get the same result), then that other property and the Hamiltonian have a commutator of zero, and so that property, whatever it is (and which properties this applies to depend on the system) doesn’t change in time at all. In other words, if something commutes with the Hamiltonian, it doesn’t evolve. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2022, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/197 "2022-12-26T20:37:18Z")
> [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](#): > > How can you tell the difference between an auto worker and a physicist? > > Ask her to pronounce “unionized”. I suffered rather a lot of public embarrassment learning how to pronounce “anion” & “cation”. Words like those should be illegal. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2022, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/198 "2022-12-26T21:23:32Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > I suffered rather a lot of public embarrassment learning how to pronounce “anion” & “cation”. Words like those should be illegal. Approaching hydroxide zone. Proceed with cation. ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2022, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/199 "2022-12-26T21:58:50Z")
A man walks into a tailor’s shop in Athens, holding a pair of pants. The tailor says, “Euripides?” The man replies, “Eumenides.” ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2022, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/200 "2022-12-26T22:02:25Z")
Thanks for that, Private Magliozzi. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532.md?page=11)