# Nerdy, Geeky Jokes **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 25, 2022, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532 "2022-11-25T15:23:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2022, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/61 "2022-11-27T18:25:50Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > I once saw a license plate that read PANDNH4. Learning some rudimentary chemistry at Nuke School helped a lot with that. I haven’t taught Chemistry in forever, so that one took a second. My first translation was “pee & ammonia.” 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Karen\_Lingel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/karen_lingel/32/18649_2.png) [@Karen\_Lingel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Karen_Lingel)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2022, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/62 "2022-11-27T18:29:53Z")
PhD in Physics. I don’t get about 10% of the jokes here (mostly chemistry ones). ---
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2022, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/63 "2022-11-27T19:16:46Z")
Have heard about that band, 1023MB? They’re not bad, but they haven’t had any gigs yet. – A photon checks into a hotel. The bellhop asks, “Do you have any luggage?” The photon replies, “No, I’m traveling light.” – A rancher counted 196 cattle in a field. But when he rounded them up, he had 200. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2022, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/64 "2022-11-27T19:21:03Z")
Related: A mathematician is in a hotel room, and a fire starts in a wastebasket. There’s an empty ice bucket and a sink in the room, so he fills up the bucket in the sink, and uses it to put out the fire. The next night, there’s another fire in the wastebasket, but this time, the bucket is full of water. So the mathematician empties the bucket down the drain, thereby reducing the problem to one previously solved, and goes back to bed. ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2022, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/65 "2022-11-27T19:22:44Z")
Rene Descartes walks into a bar and orders a drink. When he finishes his drink, the bartender asks him if he would like another. Descartes replies, “I think not,” and disappears. ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2022, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/66 "2022-11-27T19:24:00Z")
> [@DesertDog](#): > > In a similar vein\* did Roman medics transfuse blood with “4” needles? What’s a robot’s favorite Disney film? Five Dalmatians. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2022, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/67 "2022-11-27T21:42:33Z")
Most of these jokes are pretty well worn, but I still enjoyed this thread. ---
**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2022, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/68 "2022-11-28T06:56:34Z")
> [@Mighty\_Mouse](#): > > Uneducated and passion for reading cannot coexist for long. True enough, a better statement may have been “not formally educated”. However, hanging around this place and alla youse folks these past years has instilled a sense of humility I never had before because I knew more trivia and big words than my coworkers Also, reading about child psychology as a hobby and actually studying and practicing it are very very different, one leads to actual understanding more than the other ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2022, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/69 "2022-11-28T13:03:50Z")
Here’s an old but still important website that outlines the dangers of Dihydrogen Monoxide, a little understood, odorless, colorless, extremely dangerous chemical that is very prevalent in our environment. Visiting the site is also a nostalgic trip back to 90s era web design! > **[Dihydrogen Monoxide Research Division - dihydrogen monoxide info](https://www.dhmo.org/)** > > Dihydrogen Monoxide > resources, information, research and more. Dihydrogen > Monoxide is a dangerous chemical. Buy a Ban Dihydrogen > Monoxide T-shirt. The dangers of DHMO have largely been ignored in the media, with a few exceptions… > **[DIHYDROGEN MONOXIDE: UNRECOGNIZED KILLER](https://www.washingtonpost.com/archive/opinions/1997/10/21/dihydrogen-monoxide-unrecognized-killer/ee85631a-c426-42c4-bda7-ed63db993106/)** ---
**Author:** ![Moonrise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moonrise/32/14764_2.png) [@Moonrise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonrise)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2022, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/70 "2022-11-28T13:54:39Z")
> [@Orville\_mogul](#): > > If you don’t mind the slight hijack, I would be curious to know the background of the people here and how many of these jokes they understand. I’m a linguist by training but I got almost all of the “hard sciences” jokes because : 1. I’ve had a lifelong interest in mathematics, physics and chemistry (growing up, I wanted to be an astronomer), so I have been familiar with the “simplified” versions of the concepts mentioned in the jokes for decades. 2. My ex has a PhD in a STEM field. She introduced me to some of the concepts I didn’t know about, including a few jokes comparable to the ones upthread. From the world of linguistics : - [-Roman]–\>[+Roman] / [+Rome] \_\_\_ [+Rome] - Bartender: Sir, what beer would you like? Linguist: IPA Bartender: [sɜː, wɒt bɪə wəd jə laɪk] - A linguistics professor was lecturing his class the other day. “In English, a double negative forms a positive. However, in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative remains a negative. But there isn’t a single language, not one, in which a double positive can express a negative.” A voice from the back of the room blurted out, “Yeah, right.” - Linguistics - When you can analyze the syntactic processes of 12 languages but can’t say “Hello” in any of them. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2022, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/71 "2022-11-28T16:09:12Z")
> [@Karen\_Lingel](#): > > PhD in Physics. I don’t get about 10% of the jokes here (mostly chemistry ones) My brother’s degree is in Chemistry (he stopped work on his PhD to complete a Masters in Statistics). He recently told me a joke that I totally didn’t get. He asked if I’d ever had a class in physical chemistry . I had not. He then spent _hours_ on p-chem stuff, including a good bit of calculus. Eventually I understood why the joke was funny. Would not do again. ---
**Author:** ![RayMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e495f1/32.png) [@RayMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RayMan)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2022, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/72 "2022-11-28T17:04:20Z")
You mean topologically. ---
**Author:** ![Wallaby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/dc4da7/32.png) [@Wallaby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wallaby)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2022, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/73 "2022-11-28T20:29:25Z")
I have degrees in psychology,economics and politics. I don’t have a job but at least I know why. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2022, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/74 "2022-11-29T00:19:36Z")
> [@Orville\_mogul](#): > > If you don’t mind the slight hijack, I would be curious to know the background of the people here and how many of these jokes they understand. Art teacher, but I got a BS in Biology back in the '70s. Got all but the advanced math ones. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2022, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/75 "2022-11-29T00:25:06Z")
> [@Moonrise](#): > > From the world of linguistics : > > - [-Roman]–\>[+Roman] / [+Rome] \_\_\_ [+Rome] OK, I think this is the first one I don’t get. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2022, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/76 "2022-11-29T04:02:07Z")
That one beat me like a red-headed stepchild too. The rest of the thread I got. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2022, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/77 "2022-11-29T04:04:24Z")
I tell this joke to students every year. ---
**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2022, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/78 "2022-11-29T04:28:04Z")
Erm, yeah. Meant to type topologically. Must have hit the predicted word and not noticed. ---
**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2022, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/79 "2022-11-29T04:46:53Z")
It’s all greek to me. 😁 Sorry, couldn’t resist… ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2022, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532/80 "2022-11-29T04:58:41Z")
Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo. It’s all Buffolonian to me. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nerdy-geeky-jokes/975532.md?page=5)