# Never go into business with a lover **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 9, 2015, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091 "2015-11-09T11:32:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![contradancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@contradancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/contradancer)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/1 "2015-11-09T11:32:53Z")
Ever since the debacle of no-doc loans, the congress having stomped on them, banks have been afraid to approve any loan that might have the slightest risk. My son is desperate, his ex and former partner in an assisted living, refused to sign on a pre-existing mtg with a balance of $200,000 when it came up for renewal. It did not change anything for her in any way. She kept saying she had sold her shares to him and wasn’t responsible. However the bank had not released her from the loan. And would not. And it doesn’t help that when she kicked him out he took up with an employee and they now live together. I seriously think she has descended into madness. She will lose her payment of $4200/m for 17 years if the building is foreclosed and told her attorney she didn’t care. Even the officer from the SBA loan in second position has said the odds of the vacant building selling are practically nil. I have done her taxes for years and I know she will not be able to support herself on her salary alone. He went to Wells Fargo, who have a small branch in his small mountain town where the assisted living is located. The female rep there encouraged him to apply and gave him hope. It took us a week to get all the paperwork together (I do his taxes). He turned it all in and overnight he got a call it was denied. She said she had been entering the information into the computer as we went along. So, it appears the computer made the decision and not a real loan officer. The problem is a computer program can’t take into account anything that doesn’t fit into the loan guidelines. His formerly excellent credit score was down because she made three late payments on her truck and her house (now current); He’s still on the truck loan and the house, although he quit claimed it to her. Wells Fargo didn’t care in the least. Lower credit scores (640) are an immediate reason for denial. The business has a good cash flow and no debt. Never any delinquent payments on the two mtgs. in ten years. No adverse reports from the state. All rooms are occupied. I know no one actually looked at the loan because of the short time before denial, less than 24 hours.:mad: Never go to Wells Fargo unless everything is absolutely perfect. In other words, when you don’t need a loan. They will not loan to you. They are not small business friendly. Another thing, when she called about the denial she said that they don’t lend to assisted livings. I wonder what they are paying her for. Certainly not her expertise obviously. So, the first lien bank is issuing a Notice of Default in 3 weeks. She said she would sign if he added $50,000 to the loan note she holds; pay off her truck ($26,000) allow her to go into the business anytime without notice. Can’t do that because he had to get a restraining order for her misconduct last year, scaring the elderly residents and shouting obscenities. Oh and she also wanted him to pay her attorney’s fees and her delinquent credit card payments. It just seems so wrong. Seven freaking years they had worked to get this business to a level where it made a positive net income and now it will all be gone. A judge would probably rule her temporarily insane if presented with the facts. My son is physically sick and has developed ongoing pain from the stress. And 15 old people are going to have to be relocated to places much further away and more expensive. And some of them don’t have families. The bank will do this with a hired administrator. In the end spending more than the loan balance due. Any of you that have had vindictive ex’s know what I’m talking about. She hates his guts for leaving and getting a new partner. She even took his beloved dog to the vet’s to have her put down and he stopped it literally with only ten minutes to spare. He was crying on the phone as he rushed to the vet’s office, and I kept yelling at him to call the vet. Thank god his name was on the file. Anyone that could kill that sweet creature, I can’t forgive her for that. So, it’s been a hell of a ride. The situation has been explained to her over and over, but she doesn’t care. ---
**Author:** ![desertmonk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@desertmonk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/desertmonk)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/2 "2015-11-09T12:23:44Z")
What? ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/3 "2015-11-09T14:05:53Z")
What kind of mortgage requires a “renewal”? ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/4 "2015-11-09T14:14:53Z")
Hell, fury, woman scorned, you know the deal. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/5 "2015-11-09T14:29:10Z")
Can you tell us more about the dog? ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/6 "2015-11-09T14:39:06Z")
Do you know, for a fact, that she DIDN’T sell her shares to him? Or are you just believing him over her? ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/7 "2015-11-09T14:57:22Z")
I understand the part about Wells Fargo sucking, but the rest is very confusing. ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/8 "2015-11-09T15:08:11Z")
> [@digs](#): > > Can you tell us more about the dog? I’m more interested in who gets the toaster and where the Panamanian tailor is going and what the Hell happened to all my lemons, they were just here a second ago… > [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > What kind of mortgage requires a “renewal”? The fake kind. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/9 "2015-11-09T15:18:37Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Hell, fury, woman scorned, you know the deal. Also, two sides to every story. ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/10 "2015-11-09T15:36:17Z")
> [@Derleth](#): > > what the Hell happened to all my lemons, they were just here a second ago… Ask the dog. Or the Panamanian tailor. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/11 "2015-11-09T15:42:19Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > I understand the part about Wells Fargo sucking, … That’s a universal constant. I’m surprised there are people out there that don’t already know that. ---
**Author:** ![Caffeine.addict](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f475e1/32.png) [@Caffeine.addict](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caffeine.addict)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/12 "2015-11-09T15:44:31Z")
I can’t imagine that they are worse than Bank of America. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/13 "2015-11-09T15:48:57Z")
My wife and I run a small business out of our home. It’s paradise. ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/14 "2015-11-09T16:03:00Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > What kind of mortgage requires a “renewal”? The kind you get in any country but the US, actually. Seeing as we’re talking about Wells Fargo that seems unlikely though. ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/15 "2015-11-09T16:07:48Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > I understand the part about Wells Fargo sucking, but the rest is very confusing. > [@Morgenstern](#): > > That’s a universal constant. I’m surprised there are people out there that don’t already know that. Um, actually I had/have no problem with Wells Fargo mortgage. As a matter of fact, when I did my house shopping, the WF mortgage representative was far more helpful than the realtor (and I’m not capitalizing that, no one else’s job is capitalized\*). I only saw the realtor about three times and could never get her on the phone. \*except maybe as a title ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/16 "2015-11-09T16:22:07Z")
> [@Rhythmdvl](#): > > My wife and I run a small business out of our home. It’s paradise. Keep your lover out of it, though! ---
**Author:** ![watchwolf49](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9c0ed/32.png) [@watchwolf49](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/watchwolf49)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/17 "2015-11-09T16:32:31Z")
What does the Divorce Decree say about all this? A 640 credit score is bad, real bad. I know there was a 10 or 15 years time period where such a low score could get you a mortgage, and look what happened to the real estate market. We’ve returned to more normal lending practices today and it’s more important than even to keep your bills paid in full and on time. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/18 "2015-11-09T16:35:12Z")
> [@Kimballkid](#): > > Um, actually I had/have no problem with Wells Fargo mortgage. As a matter of fact, when I did my house shopping, the WF mortgage representative was far more helpful than the realtor (and I’m not capitalizing that, no one else’s job is capitalized\*). I only saw the realtor about three times and could never get her on the phone. > \*except maybe as a title You forgot to add “yet” as the 8th word. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2015, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/19 "2015-11-10T06:03:21Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Keep your lover out of it, though! bDOOM _kssh_ ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2015, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091/20 "2015-11-10T14:35:42Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > bDOOM _kssh_ FTFY: _kiss_ **DOOM**! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/never-go-into-business-with-a-lover/737091.md?page=2)