# New and Unimproved Workplace Rants **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 14, 2015, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638 "2015-10-14T15:44:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 58
**Author:** ![Boggette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/858c86/32.png) [@Boggette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boggette)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2017, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1141 "2017-02-22T18:52:27Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > As a friend of mine once said to her boss, if I can’t get a 1 no matter what I do, then what’s the point of trying to? I can do less work and still get the same rating. HEY! That was me! _giggle_ I remember that. Boss was NOT amused. ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1142 "2017-02-23T00:27:11Z")
When my supervisor reminded me for what seems like the 50th time this week of the jobs I need to complete before the end of the month, then reminded me that the month ends next week, then came back and gave me a copy of some report with the jobs in question highlighted “so you know what you’re supposed to be working on,” I barely managed to suppress a snarky reply: “What, you mean besides my resume and some cover letters?” ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1143 "2017-02-23T06:14:59Z")
> [@WolfpackJeep](#): > > When my supervisor reminded me for what seems like the 50th time this week of the jobs I need to complete before the end of the month, then reminded me that the month ends next week, then came back and gave me a copy of some report with the jobs in question highlighted “so you know what you’re supposed to be working on,” I barely managed to suppress a snarky reply: “What, you mean besides my resume and some cover letters?” “Thanks - I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Said in your absolute best deadpan. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1144 "2017-02-23T06:17:38Z")
> [@Sicks\_Ate](#): > > Is it a workplace rant if it’s a potential workplace/s? > > I’ve been in the hiring process for a job I really want since the beginning of October. They indicated it would be a few month process, but I got the idea that it would be over in January or so. > > So to hedge my bet, I applied for a couple of ‘backup’ jobs in case something about this one didn’t pan out. I should mention that I’m currently employed but more or less miserable…so I want out ASAP. Opportunity #1 is good enough to wait around for, though. > > Well it has been dragging out much longer than I expected. On Monday I accepted a tentative job offer from them, BUT pending the results of a polygraph, phsych eval, and physical. So there is still plenty that could go wrong. They set my start date to March 6, which gives me enough time to let my employer know I might be bailing, but I can’t actually submit my resignation until I have something concrete, y’know? > > Well in the meantime, it’s been so much longer than I anticipated that I actually interviewed for a backup yesterday…and all the signs of the after-interview correspondence would indicate that I am at least one of the to candidates, if not the top pick. They indicate they’d like to make an offer to someone tomorrow. > > The rub is that I haven’t even done any of the 3 hurdles for #1 yet…phych eval is tomorrow, and THEN after the results of that they’ll schedule the other 2. > > So it’s entirely possible that I will be stuck with a solid job offer from #2, (which is a neat-looking job that my vacation and retirement transfers to) and a tentative job offer from #1 (super-cool job and absolutely my first pick) where something could still go wrong. > > I just don’t see the timelines working out in my favor. The initial objective was that by the time the interview for #2 rolled around, I would already know about #1…so I could rescind my application or carry on, depending how #1 panned out. > > Now I’m stuck in this crappy situation of either 1. accepting #2 because it’s a sure thing or 2. turning down #2 with no guarantee #1 is going to pan out…in which case I’d say there’s a definite non-zero chance that something happens and they don’t end up hiring me. > > Fuck me. And fuck birds in hands and bushes. If you have Netflix, watch a few episodes of _Parks & Recreation_ that deal with Ben Wyatt and his employment with the accounting firm… ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1145 "2017-02-23T06:23:57Z")
> [@digs](#): > > I have a good friend whose dream job was dragging their feet, and sure enough she got a firm offer from her second-best job. Told that to Job Numero Uno whose CEO said “We want you, we just can’t make an offer for another month or so…” > > Sho’ nuff, she took the second-best job, and the best job called her back a month later (with a job with more challenging responsibilities than the “second-besties” were giving her). > > So she jumped ship! She still feels bad that she was only at the other job a month (but the woman that was her interviewer and supervisor there has stayed a friend). > > She’s so happy that it all turned out well that my advice is: if you take second-best, keep lines of communication open with your first place job. I had that experience, too (except I was at the second-best job for just over a year, although I would not have hesitated to jump ship during my first week). ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1146 "2017-02-23T06:27:32Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > As a friend of mine once said to her boss, if I can’t get a 1 no matter what I do, then what’s the point of trying to? I can do less work and still get the same rating. > [@Boggette](#): > > HEY! That was me! _giggle_ I remember that. Boss was NOT amused. Not even when you told the Boss that it WASN’T a rhetorical question? ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 8:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1147 "2017-02-23T08:38:00Z")
> [@kiz](#): > > What’s Now Current Employer allows us to keep bottled water on hand as long as the bottle has one of those pop-up “sports” caps to minimize leakage. > > It’s been heaven given the general HVAC and especially for me working in an area with very little ventilation. The problem with that is that if I keep drinking, I keep needing to pee. She probably wouldn’t like it if I needed to excuse myself half-meeting to go make a little river. ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2017, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1148 "2017-02-25T01:20:40Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > “Thanks - I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Said in your absolute best deadpan. 🙂 He’s the type of person who would find this touching though. ---
**Author:** ![Boggette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/858c86/32.png) [@Boggette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boggette)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2017, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1149 "2017-02-27T13:42:01Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Not even when you told the Boss that it WASN’T a rhetorical question? I had another boss, many moons ago, who, when I asked for a raise (to cover all the extra work I was going as his manager-sans-title) made the mistake of saying, “No one else asked for a raise!” “That’s nice. If they want a raise, though, they can ask you for one themselves. I am me and asking for me. I’m doing the work, I should get the pay.” Got my raise, too. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![4kad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/4/7cd45c/32.png) [@4kad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/4kad)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2017, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1150 "2017-02-27T15:39:20Z")
Coworkers who want to be chatty in the breakroom early in the morning annoys the hell out of me ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2017, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1151 "2017-02-27T17:20:50Z")
Rantworthy update to my situation above: Last week, #1 rescinded my conditional offer of employment. Why is this rantworthy? Because their reasoning is that I’m too smart. More background on this, because why not. This is a police officer job; not a typical city cop, think more along the lines of a park ranger, fish&game agent etc. Lots of work with the public doing presentations about nature, history, animals etc. Really sweet job, I thought, that also lines up with my experience. So I was the end of the process, meaning they had done my background check and talked to a thousand people I know. I was almost hired, when they decided that I couldn’t possibly actually enjoy this job, because I’m not dumb enough to appreciate it. Hell, here’s the relevant paragraphs from my rejection e-mail: > [@](#): > > As you’ll note from the attached reports, in many areas, your thinking style when it comes to such things as Learning Index and Vocabulary is much higher than the position requires, presenting the very real possibility of boredom and frustration when operating within the day to day requirements of the position. > > Please know that these reports in no way indicate that you would not be highly qualified for other positions requiring much higher Learning Index and Vocabulary scores. They just show that we would be doing a disservice to both you and our organization by employing you in a position that underutilized your thinking style in these and other key areas within the profile. I hope they’re happy with their perfectly average employees. ETA: Bright side, I did accept the offer from #2. It’s a big pay cut, but I get to keep my vacation, sick leave, and also my 14 years at my current employer for purposes of retirement and annual leave calculation. Plus it’s an entire 'nother area of knowledge I’ll get to learn. ---
**Author:** ![MagicEyes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@MagicEyes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MagicEyes)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2017, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1152 "2017-02-27T19:54:54Z")
Our intern wears too much cologne. Cheap cologne is an abomination. It should be banned. ---
**Author:** ![Calatin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Calatin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calatin)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2017, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1153 "2017-02-27T20:53:45Z")
> [@Sicks\_Ate](#): > > Rantworthy update to my situation above: > > Last week, #1 rescinded my conditional offer of employment. Why is this rantworthy? Because their reasoning is that I’m too smart. > > More background on this, because why not. This is a police officer job; not a typical city cop, think more along the lines of a park ranger, fish&game agent etc. Lots of work with the public doing presentations about nature, history, animals etc. Really sweet job, I thought, that also lines up with my experience. > > So I was the end of the process, meaning they had done my background check and talked to a thousand people I know. I was almost hired, when they decided that I couldn’t possibly actually enjoy this job, because I’m not dumb enough to appreciate it. Hell, here’s the relevant paragraphs from my rejection e-mail: > > I hope they’re happy with their perfectly average employees. > > ETA: Bright side, I did accept the offer from #2. It’s a big pay cut, but I get to keep my vacation, sick leave, and also my 14 years at my current employer for purposes of retirement and annual leave calculation. Plus it’s an entire 'nother area of knowledge I’ll get to learn. This is not all that uncommon in public sector work. The rationale is that, by the time you “wise up” and decide to leave, they will have invested time and money into training you and getting you up to speed for the job. If they hire the “most intelligent / ideal” candidate, they could be stuck in a never-ending cycle of having short-term employees. ---
**Author:** ![3trew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/3/13edae/32.png) [@3trew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3trew)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2017, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1154 "2017-03-01T04:36:31Z")
I would like to know how some customers think the conversation is going to go. Like, in their heads, what is the optimum outcome? When you call in with a technical problem and are asked for your account number, you can provide the account number, you can say you don’t have the account number with you and we can find another way to pull up the account, or you can scream “Suck my dick, you piece of shit, that’s my fucking account number!”. I understand the first and second options, but what makes some people think the third one is the key to getting anything other than “Okay, sir, you have a nice day” followed by the call disconnecting? Has this worked for them in the past? Do they think I will be so impressed by their alphaness that I will go out of my way to make sure that they have an extra wonderful customer experience? It’s a mystery to me. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2017, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1155 "2017-03-01T04:49:32Z")
> [@3trew](#): > > I understand the first and second options, but what makes some people think the third one is the key to getting anything other than “Okay, sir, you have a nice day” followed by the call disconnecting? Has this worked for them in the past? Do they think I will be so impressed by their alphaness that I will go out of my way to make sure that they have an extra wonderful customer experience? It’s a mystery to me. Possibly because they’ve already had to key the account number in one or more times already as they navigated the phone tree to finally reach a human? But your system is so poor that it didn’t get passed on to you, and now you are asking for it again. I know that has happened to me, and that obscene reaction has seemed tempting to me. ---
**Author:** ![3trew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/3/13edae/32.png) [@3trew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3trew)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2017, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1156 "2017-03-01T05:32:04Z")
Nope. I’m a customer as well as a rep. The system doesn’t ask for a number. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2017, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1157 "2017-03-01T05:42:09Z")
> [@3trew](#): > > Nope. I’m a customer as well as a rep. The system doesn’t ask for a number. If this happens once in a great while, then I’d say it’s someone having a bad day (and possibly conflating your company with someone else they’ve had a bad experience with). If it happens a lot, then there is/are one or more points in your customer service process that is causing people great frustration. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2017, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1158 "2017-03-01T07:07:58Z")
Not so dear, hopefully soon to be ex agent: We have a direct contact in the client who likes to “give it to [us] up the ass because [he] can”. We have you paying late, after multiple reminders, and whining that after telling people that you hadn’t paid them because you “forgot” or “hadn’t planned for that payment”, we do remind you. And you aren’t even capable of doing the monthly paperwork required for us to be able to access the client’s facilites, where we are stored in an underground room that may or may not change daily. It will be a frabjous day when I can send that 30 days notice, baby. It will be such a sweet, sweet day. ---
**Author:** ![kiz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7feea3/32.png) [@kiz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kiz)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2017, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1159 "2017-03-01T12:20:06Z")
So we have Big Important Meeting With TPTB later this week. One day, three different time slots. I’m off that day, but I will get paid for attending. Then HR told me I didn’t need to attend. Wouldn’t give my manager a reason. Everyone else, including my manager, is required to attend. New Current Employer also has an annual “how do you like working here” survey going on now. Supposedly you fill it out anonymously EXCEPT they ask you for your employee # when you sign onto the website. How is that anonymous, pray tell? As a result nobody has filled it out because of potential repercussions. We’re losing people, especially assistant managers, left and right. Everyone else is too scared to look for other opportunities. I have several coworkers who are slated to retire between now and 2-3 years from now, and they’re petrified they’re going to be either fired or laid off. I predict this Big Important Meeting will be quite interesting. A few of my more feisty coworkers are primed to say EXACTLY what they think, job security be damned. [sub]I’m being deliberately obtuse as to what’s really going on at work because it’s just too complicated to describe other than too many tasks vs. too few employees. Everyone is overworked, grumpy-angry, and exhausted, myself included.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![aktep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f0a364/32.png) [@aktep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aktep)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2017, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638/1160 "2017-03-01T15:06:34Z")
> [@kiz](#): > > S > New Current Employer also has an annual “how do you like working here” survey going on now. Supposedly you fill it out anonymously EXCEPT they ask you for your employee # when you sign onto the website. How is that anonymous, pray tell? As a result nobody has filled it out because of potential repercussions. We have bought and written anonymous surveys that require you to authenticate first, to make sure you only take the survey once or to keep the audience limited. Your identifying info is not saved with the data in the survey. Now, yes, you could piece that together from access logs and the like if you wanted. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638.md?page=57) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-and-unimproved-workplace-rants/734638.md?page=59)