# New Basketball League: You Aren't Going to Believe This **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [January 20, 2010, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743 "2010-01-20T21:21:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2010, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/21 "2010-01-21T19:56:36Z")
I just want to know if the rims will be set at 8 feet? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Philster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/13edae/32.png) [@Philster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philster)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2010, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/22 "2010-01-21T20:11:34Z")
Did he mention if this league would ban guns? ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2010, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/23 "2010-01-21T21:12:24Z")
The story sounds like a hoax. But even if it is, it reflects widespread and SILLY prejudices. A few years back, when the movie “Glory Road” came out, I remember seeing several interviews with the black players from that Texas Western Miners team that won the NCAA title over all-white Kentucky in 1966. One thing the black players agreed on was that the movie got the nature of their team AND Kentucky’s squad completely wrong! The movie showed the Kentucky Wildcats as slow and methodical, while the Texas Western Miners were shown as a free-wheeling, exciting, running, showboating team. The Texas Western players all scoffed at that portrayal, which they said turned reality on its head. They all agreed that “Coach Haskins was all about tough defense, fundamentals, and slowing down the tempo of the game. It was the Kentucky boys who were trying to run.” The idea that black players are showboaters while white guys play “smart,” “sound,” “fundamental” basketball is widely emrbaced by both blacks and whites, by now. But it has little to do with reality. ---
**Author:** ![Cardinal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardinal/32/4000_2.png) [@Cardinal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardinal)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/24 "2010-01-22T07:11:02Z")
Yeah, Larry Bird, Steve Nash, Dirk, and Jason Williams are/were really boring. And Tim Duncan is a showboating freakshow. I know those are just a few data points, but if this isn’t a hoax, it’s not only a simple minded generalization, it ignores a fundamental tenet of business: people want to see people and machines operating at their very best. You know why Top Gear focuses on cars that most of their viewers couldn’t buy with a second mortgage and a gun? It’s because people like to see the extraordinary, and they like to sit down to watch the exotic. Michael Jordan can pass like a psychic, shoot like Pete Maravich, and dunk like he’s got a special dispensation from God? Make that man a global phenomenon. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/25 "2010-01-22T08:15:58Z")
> [@astorian](#): > > The idea that black players are showboaters while white guys play “smart,” “sound,” “fundamental” basketball is widely emrbaced by both blacks and whites, by now. But it has little to do with reality. The problem with that is that it is widely embraced and becomes self-fulfilling to some extent. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Sensitive](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/58956e/32.png) [@Darth\_Sensitive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Sensitive)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/26 "2010-01-22T08:44:06Z")
Taking a charge will be worth 2 pts. Making both your free throws gets an extra point, while making all three nets an extra two. Those who dunk on a breakaway instead of making a layup will get a technical foul. More ideas? ---
**Author:** ![Jules\_Andre](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jules_andre/32/9334_2.png) [@Jules\_Andre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jules_Andre)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/27 "2010-01-22T13:21:12Z")
> [@Darth\_Sensitive](#): > > Taking a charge will be worth 2 pts. > > Making both your free throws gets an extra point, while making all three nets an extra two. > > Those who dunk on a breakaway instead of making a layup will get a technical foul. > > More ideas? Palming or carrying will be called on any crossover or spin dribble. No player may dribble with his hand anywhere other than the very top of the basketball. Two handed set shots only. Shorts to mid thigh or shorter, none of this thug dress. Three players per team must wear goggles. All I’ve got for now. ---
**Author:** ![unwashed\_brain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/a9adbd/32.png) [@unwashed\_brain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/unwashed_brain)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/28 "2010-01-22T14:43:50Z")
> [@Jules\_Andre](#): > > Palming or carrying will be called on any crossover or spin dribble. No player may dribble with his hand anywhere other than the very top of the basketball. > > Two handed set shots only. > > Shorts to mid thigh or shorter, none of this thug dress. > > Three players per team must wear goggles. > > All I’ve got for now. LOL - these are great. Low-top sneakers only. Over the calf-socks. No shot-blocking allowed. Every play must start with the weave and include a pick-and-roll. You must look at the person to whom you are passing the ball. ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/29 "2010-01-22T15:32:14Z")
> [@unwashed\_brain](#): > > LOL - these are great. > > Low-top sneakers only. > Over the calf-socks. > No shot-blocking allowed. > Every play must start with the weave and include a pick-and-roll. > You must look at the person to whom you are passing the ball. Free throws made in Rick Barry style. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/30 "2010-01-22T15:36:40Z")
> [@ministryman](#): > > Free throws made in Rick Barry style. 2011 MVP? David Eckstein. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Sensitive](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/58956e/32.png) [@Darth\_Sensitive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Sensitive)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/31 "2010-01-22T15:44:09Z")
Every player bio must include “gym rat” or “high basketball IQ”. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/32 "2010-01-22T15:48:42Z")
> [@kunilou](#): > > I can see it now. An entire league made up of black players who were adopted as children by white parents. Arnold is waaaaay too short to play hoops. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/33 "2010-01-22T15:55:20Z")
Lots of crisply executed, two handed bounce passes. All layups must use the backboard. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/34 "2010-01-22T16:44:03Z")
Say, aren’t all the white basketball players busy playing agasint the Harlem Globetrotters? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de053/32.png) [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/35 "2010-01-22T16:49:40Z")
So, of the current top players in the NBA, who would be eligible to join this league? I’m guessing that they’d be willing to make an exception for Steve Nash, even though he’s Canadian. But who else? Off the top of my head, we have David Lee, Kirk Hinrich, Chris Kaman, Luke Ridnour and Chris “Birdman” Andersen. I’m not even sure of Brook Lopez would count. Edit: Forgot Steve Blake and Jason “white chocolate” Williams, although Williams’ “chocolate” style of play may disqualify him. Sounds like it would be an exciting league.:rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/36 "2010-01-22T16:51:26Z")
> [@Darth\_Sensitive](#): > > Every player bio must include “gym rat” or “high basketball IQ”. Don’t forget “lunch bucket player” with a “blue collar work style”. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/37 "2010-01-22T16:59:01Z")
> [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](#): > > Off the top of my head, we have David Lee, Kirk Hinrich, Chris Kaman, Luke Ridnour and Chris “Birdman” Andersen. Birdman has enough tattoos that he probably counts as “colored.” ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/38 "2010-01-22T17:06:06Z")
The ball must be passed thre times before attempting a basket. Any between the legs dribbling will be a foul. No games on Sunday. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/39 "2010-01-22T17:08:50Z")
> [@Jules\_Andre](#): > > Three players per team must wear goggles. Big, thick “Kurt Rambis” glasses are an acceptable substitute. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2010, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743/40 "2010-01-22T17:53:48Z")
> [@Gangster\_Octopus](#): > > The ball must be passed thre times before attempting a basket. > > Any between the legs dribbling will be a foul. > > No games on Sunday. One from the Twitter feed: Divisions are North, South, East and Utah. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-basketball-league-you-arent-going-to-believe-this/525743.md?page=3)