# New Chick Tract- "Fairy Tales?" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 5, 2007, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929 "2007-05-05T22:43:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![GLWasteful](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f05b48/32.png) [@GLWasteful](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GLWasteful)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2007, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/61 "2007-05-06T19:17:15Z")
[QUOTE=Bryan Ekers] Huh. Evolution in action. [/QUOTE] And about damned time, too. ---
**Author:** ![Darkhold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/90db22/32.png) [@Darkhold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darkhold)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2007, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/62 "2007-05-06T19:24:35Z")
For the people that don’t get this one the message is simple. If you tell your children about Santa/easter bunny/tooth fairy or any other ‘fairy tale’ you won’t have any creditability when you tell them about how great Jesus and Co. are. Which is a fair point in my opinion after all the story of being directly rewarded per tooth has actual physical evidence going for it (i.e. money under your pillow) and if that turns out to be bullshit how unlikely does it sound that a magic man in the sky will give you bliss in the afterlife if you just accept his son as a savior? Anyway in Jack Chick’s world any moment not talking about or thinking about how great Jesus is is pretty much a waste of time if not an outright sin and telling your children any tales that aren’t direct from the Bible just turns them into little psychotic serial killers. Whereas if you just told them wholesome stories like the story of Lot then you’ll come out with totally normal good little Christians. ---
**Author:** ![Kneepants\_Erasmus\_the\_Humanist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/54ee81/32.png) [@Kneepants\_Erasmus\_the\_Humanist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kneepants_Erasmus_the_Humanist)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2007, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/63 "2007-05-06T19:31:48Z")
[QUOTE=GLWasteful] I like the look on the face of the paleontologist/archaeologist. Seems pretty bent about something. Maybe he ordered _pork_ stir fry for lunch, and found a chicken leg bone. So he’s insisting on a refund. [/QUOTE] I think I seriously injured myself laughing at this. That looks to be \*exactly \* what is happening. And you would expect the schoolmarm to be _for_ prayer in school, wouldn’t you? ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2007, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/64 "2007-05-06T20:35:52Z")
I like how in the panel about _The Day That Changed Harry Forever_, Harry has flames shooting out of him! That’d be so cool! Or hot, I guess. If ol’ Chickie had really been on his game, there would have been a little demon perched on Harry’s shoulder telling Harry to kill those Santa naysayers. I really like it when Chickie has little demons perched on evil people’s shoulders. Makes me want one of my own. So, Harry’s parents took him to church but he still never heard of Jesus? Oh wait, that Minister was preaching on the Easter Bunny. Sorry, my mistake. ---
**Author:** ![GLWasteful](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f05b48/32.png) [@GLWasteful](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GLWasteful)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2007, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/65 "2007-05-06T21:51:39Z")
**Kneepants Erasmus, the Humanist** : Ordinarily, yes. Which is why Jack portrays her with a “No Prayers” placard. Subtlety is the calling card of our Mr Chick. And while you say you want a demon _now_, **swampbear** , soon he would be tearing the place up and pissing in the heat registers while you went about your everyday life without giving him a second thought. So until you’ve demonstrated a level of responsibility and maturity, then there’ll be no demon for you. Now, eat your beets. ---
**Author:** ![mamboman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecb155/32.png) [@mamboman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mamboman)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2007, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/66 "2007-05-06T22:02:27Z")
At what point do Harry’s mother and father promise never to lie to him? ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2007, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/67 "2007-05-06T22:11:24Z")
I’d love to know why Chick has Marilyn Manson playing the reporter in the early panels. ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/68 "2007-05-07T01:23:12Z")
:dubious: Hey someone call Jack Chick that someone hacked his site and sabotaged his track!!! :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/69 "2007-05-07T01:33:38Z")
> [@](#): > > So, Harry’s parents took him to church but he still never heard of Jesus? Oh wait, that Minister was preaching on the Easter Bunny. Sorry, my mistake. It’s a Catholic church. And as we all [know,](http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0071/0071_01.asp) Catholics aren’t Christians. ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/70 "2007-05-07T01:52:23Z")
[QUOTE=Terrifel] What exactly did Harry’s hellbound parents get him for Christmas anyway? Okay, there’s a toy Godzilla and a telescope, but what is that one other gift that Harry seems especially enraptured with? It appears to be a simple T-shaped yard tool of some kind, with a “Superman”-derived merchandise label. A lawn edger? Manhole cover opener? Does the fact that it’s apparently glowing have any significance? Is it somehow the true key to understanding Harry’s downfall? [/QUOTE] Its part of a build-your-own cross set (that he never finished). ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/71 "2007-05-07T02:07:51Z")
[QUOTE=Shagnasty] Its part of a build-your-own cross set (that he never finished). [/QUOTE] Anti-Christ pogo stick…? ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/72 "2007-05-07T11:53:58Z")
[QUOTE=GLWasteful] And while you say you want a demon _now_, **swampbear** , soon he would be tearing the place up and pissing in the heat registers while you went about your everyday life without giving him a second thought. So until you’ve demonstrated a level of responsibility and maturity, then there’ll be no demon for you. Now, eat your beets. [/QUOTE] Of fine! But don’t act like you didn’t know it was coming when I shoot up the playground because all the other kids have a demon and I don’t! ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/73 "2007-05-07T12:34:13Z")
I’m wondering if twenty years ago a school shooting would be called “an act of terrorism.” Hell, I’m wondering if anyone would use this term today to describe a school shooting. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/74 "2007-05-07T12:48:45Z")
[QUOTE=mobo85] will can’t never tooth magical money money never Santa Claus when? very knows knows good believe Santa never know Right? love never ever! tell you I’m Easter egg Easter Bunny you The day that changed Harry- forever no Everybody liars! lied Kill arrested. Breaking News death identity youth shut down cope tied down? protection. help me! liars real pretended Gulp! God Jesus Right?-ANSWER ME! You lied to me! You promised you’d never lie! just No!- You’re liars! never strangled deserved not You’re next told you hard question fairy tale fool is important don’t all Humph! how Jesus never still does filled their everybody else’s. feared hated betrayed without mercy. rose anyone you lie! any God died slapped captured death don’t yes do! believe never still don’t everything no fairy tale! [/QUOTE] You know that strange, sureal feeling you get after you listen to all your rock’n’roll records backwards and then go kill your family? No, neither do I, but I suspect you might be muttering something like the above. Thanks, Jack Chick and your (not-so) random italics. ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/75 "2007-05-07T13:06:33Z")
My knowledge of the Bible is a little rusty… was there a specific part where a Roman soldier had Jesus at the end of a big stick, wienie roast style? ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/76 "2007-05-07T13:47:30Z")
[QUOTE=Batsinma Belfry] My knowledge of the Bible is a little rusty… was there a specific part where a Roman soldier had Jesus at the end of a big stick, wienie roast style? [/QUOTE] I believe the picture next to John 3:16 is depicting the part of the Bible where Jesus has a spear (sometimes referred to as a holy relic, the Spear of Longinus or Spear of Destiny) stuck into the side of his body. > [@](#): > > But when they came to Jesus, and saw that he was dead already, they brake not his legs: But one of the soldiers with a spear pierced his side, and forthwith came there out blood and water. John 19:33-34 (KJV) ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/77 "2007-05-07T14:24:53Z")
[QUOTE=Annie-Xmas] I’m wondering if twenty years ago a school shooting would be called “an act of terrorism.” Hell, I’m wondering if anyone would use this term today to describe a school shooting. [/QUOTE] Well, it doesn’t say it was a shooting. Maybe he used a car bomb, or crashed a jetliner into his victims. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/78 "2007-05-07T14:51:34Z")
Maybe he broke into the kindergarten room and set free the guinea pig and the iguana. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/79 "2007-05-07T15:49:58Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] Maybe he broke into the kindergarten room and set free the guinea pig and the iguana. [/QUOTE] OOH! I know! The guinea pig and iguana mated and their unholy issue is what Harry used to kill his friends! ---
**Author:** ![Will\_Repair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a698b9/32.png) [@Will\_Repair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Will_Repair)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2007, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929/80 "2007-05-07T15:56:40Z")
I remember where I was when Santa Claus died. Why didn’t Harry Garner kill his parents? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-fairy-tales/402929.md?page=5)