# New Chick tract hardly worth pitting... **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 3, 2005, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893 "2005-01-03T21:21:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/21 "2005-01-04T05:27:54Z")
Meh, the kidnapper won’t be going to prison. He’s being represented by Johnny Cochrane. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/22 "2005-01-04T05:30:12Z")
Maybe the kidnapper got Lil’ Susie first? ---
**Author:** ![Seven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Seven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seven)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 5:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/23 "2005-01-04T05:42:47Z")
> [@Metacom](#): > > I dunno–his choice of a female agressor in a domestic violence situation is at the least… interesting. I mean, it happens, but my extensive knowledge of domestic violence statistics, largely acquired from watching COPS, tells me it’s far less common then the other way around. Nothing says funny then an older chubby lady smacking her feeble husband with a shoe. Good stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Roland\_Orzabal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c2a13f/32.png) [@Roland\_Orzabal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roland_Orzabal)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/24 "2005-01-04T05:45:44Z")
> [@Metacom](#): > > I dunno–his choice of a female agressor in a domestic violence situation is at the least… interesting. I mean, it happens, but my extensive knowledge of domestic violence statistics, largely acquired from watching COPS, tells me it’s far less common then the other way around. See, that’s because in true Christianity – you know, the kind promoted by Chick – wives are subservient to husbands in every way. So, if a man beats his wife, it’s not abuse, because she’s his to do with as she pleases anyway. Clearly, the sin committed by the woman in the cartoon was not specifically _hitting_ her husband, but daring to oppose his will at all. She just happened to have chosen a particularly expressive method of doing so. Get your Truths™ straight. ---
**Author:** ![Maxxxie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f14d63/32.png) [@Maxxxie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maxxxie)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/25 "2005-01-04T06:15:34Z")
“Mrs. Comfort”??? What the hell kind of name is that! Meanwhile, I’m trying to think of innuendo using her name, but for the life of me, I just can’t think of anything better than “find _comfort_ in Jebus”. Lame :smack: Max 😃 ---
**Author:** ![rfgdxm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c0e974/32.png) [@rfgdxm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rfgdxm)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/26 "2005-01-04T14:24:19Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > This tract looks like Chick had a couple of different ideas that weren’t going anywhere so he decided to stick them together into one story that doesn’t go anywhere. It almost looks like an editing error. Particularly the small part about spousal abuse, which doesn’t fit in with the rest of the tract. And, is white slavery with abducted US kids being sold in Saudi Arabia something that happens to a material degree? Imagine the diplomatic implications… It’s not only libelous, but absurd. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/27 "2005-01-04T15:55:31Z")
Ok, by panel three Chicky has managed to slander both Mexico and Saudi Arabia. That’s gotta be some kind of record. BTW, anybody notice how the scrawny white guy seems to be staring down at the police man’s crotch in panel two? Why, no, swampbear, you perv, it does not look that way to anybody else but you. 😃 If you use Chicky logic, the fact that the little girls are kidnapped, taken to Mexico and then to Saudi Arabia, is a snipe at the RCC. After all, Mexico is a predominatly death cookie eating, Pope worshiping, Whore of Babylon adoring, RCC country. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/28 "2005-01-04T16:17:10Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > I hope he’s feeling alright. Hell no! I’ve got the bastard in the Death Pool! ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/29 "2005-01-04T17:11:27Z")
_Any_ Chick tract is worth Pitting… Actually, I rather enjoyed this one. I especially liked the part where God advises the young kidnap victim to foil her abductor by doing Flip Wilson impersonations. Although the sudden scene shift in the middle was a little disconcerting. Officer Whosis is going up the stairs towards a domestic violence situation, he shouts, “Oh no! This is terrible!” and then the next panel is the recently saved child saying “this is certainly a happy day”. The artwork is a little weak, though. Christ on the cross looks like He is striped like a zebra. Perhaps Mr. Chick was watching “The Passion of the Christ” while drawing. Suprising he would support a film from a Death Cookie cultist. And the abusive wife’s high heel shoe in one panel looks like she is wielding a sword. When Chick finally meets his reward, a little light will go out of the universe. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Futile\_Gesture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f05b48/32.png) [@Futile\_Gesture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Futile_Gesture)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/30 "2005-01-04T17:21:05Z")
> [@Darwin's Finch](#): > > _ **Gotcha!** _ There’s no kittens… I _ **lied!** _ Chick would never make a script writer. Those kind of plot explanations are supposed to come at the _end_. “There’s one thing I don’t understand; whatever happened to the kittens?” “It’s perfectly simple, Holly, there never were any kittens. He **lied**. Now all the lying he’ll be doing is on a thin matress… in jail!” I suppose we’re to take it that the previous 4 victims didn’t get help because they had previously swapped god for a tv too. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/31 "2005-01-04T17:34:09Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > The artwork is a little weak, though. Christ on the cross looks like He is striped like a zebra. Perhaps Mr. Chick was watching “The Passion of the Christ” while drawing. Suprising he would support a film from a Death Cookie cultist. > Regards, > Shodan I seem to recall that he does not support it-didn’t he write an article warning against it? He’s probably trying to compete, but that’s bad artwork. Like I said, Jesus looks like a totem pole. Or else a mummy. And he has no face. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/32 "2005-01-04T19:09:20Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > I seem to recall that he does not support it-didn’t he write an article warning against it? He’s probably trying to compete, but that’s bad artwork. Like I said, Jesus looks like a totem pole. Or else a mummy. And he has no face. Here’s [a link](http://www.chick.com/bc/2005/toolflop.asp) to what Chicky has to say about TPOTC. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/33 "2005-01-04T19:43:22Z")
Holly: GOD’S GONNA GET YOU FOR THIS! Wow, Jack has been watching old reruns of _Maude_. ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2005, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/34 "2005-01-05T07:01:14Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Like I said, Jesus looks like a totem pole. Or else a mummy. And he has no face. It’s official: [Jesus is a shar-pei.](http://home.texoma.net/~h2358/welcome.htm) ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2005, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/35 "2005-01-05T16:13:19Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > I seem to recall that he does not support it-didn’t he write an article warning against it? He’s probably trying to compete, but that’s bad artwork. Like I said, Jesus looks like a totem pole. Or else a mummy. And he has no face. Jack & his co-artist Fred Carter have been drawing Hamburger Jesus since the mid-70s. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Lance\_Murdoch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/47e85d/32.png) [@Captain\_Lance\_Murdoch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Lance_Murdoch)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2005, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/36 "2005-01-05T16:39:46Z")
I think I found the [model](http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Club/8885/images/paradise2000/CARNAGE1.JPG) that the drawing of Jesus was based on. All in all, the artwork in this one sucked - even by the low standards of Chick artists. Compare the faces of the kidnapped girl and the kidnapper. One is rendered in great detail, while the other looks like Little Orphan Annie. Also, that abusive wife sure did a lot of damage to that guy with her shoe. Why does he have clown eyebrows? The moral to the story is that kids who are kidnapped will be saved by God. Kids who are successfully abducted must have offended God, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2005, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/37 "2005-01-05T16:42:45Z")
You know, I only ever glance at the Chick tracts just so I can come here and listen to you guys… _wipes tears of mirth_ ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2005, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/38 "2005-01-05T17:03:54Z")
Jack Chick Parody Archives: [http://www.weirdcrap.com/chick/](http://www.weirdcrap.com/chick/) ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2005, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893/39 "2005-01-05T17:54:09Z")
Well I [didn’t think it was worth pitting](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=294974) either so I started my own thread about a half hour prior to this one. It is a weak tract, a letdown after his previous two Islam bashing tracts. I didn’t really think the cop looked much like OJ. I would doubt that artists Fred **Carter** would draw a protagonist such as Officer **Carter** , using a n’er do well like OJ for a model. I think he was going more for a “gentle giant,” Michael Clarke Duncan type… on thorazine. He needs a medical checkup. What the hell does it take to get him to pull his gun? A knife in his face didn’t do the trick in _The Peacemaker_. In that situation most cops who know the Tueller drill and start shooting when the assailant is still 21 feet away and don’t stop until he’s down or they have to go to Big 5 for more ammo. Hmm, maybe internal affairs has had their eye on him so he’s Mr. NiceCop until the perp is behind closed doors where he can get a proper nightstick enema. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-hardly-worth-pitting/282893.md?page=1)