# New Chick Tract: "Here, Kitty, Kitty" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 5, 2006, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473 "2006-09-05T03:41:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2006, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/61 "2006-09-06T18:54:55Z")
[QUOTE=JohnT] And since when Chick start paraphrasing bad action movie lines? “He took our punishment… so we don’t have to!” [/QUOTE] Which movie? BTW, to me it seems more reminiscent of a cheesy line in a commercial. I can’t recall which one, though. Might have been extant in the 90’s. Something like: THIS HAIR SPRAY ACTS OBSESSIVELY-COMPULSIVELY… SO YOU DON"T HAVE TO! * * * True Blue Jack ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2006, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/62 "2006-09-06T20:10:57Z")
[QUOTE=JohnT] That’s either a band name or a new fetish. 😉 [/QUOTE] Sexual desires for Jesus and priests are an _old_ fetish. I’ve run into it fairly often. IMO it’s common enough that I am surprised not to have run into a set of slang for it, or porn, and sex products based on it. Before anybody posts a link, I’m familiar with the Baby Jesus buttplug and Jesus Jackhammer dildo. What I haven’t seen are lines of videos featuring lapsed Catholic women seducing priests. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2006, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/63 "2006-09-07T00:38:14Z")
[QUOTE=DocCathode] Sexual desires for Jesus and priests are an _old_ fetish. I’ve run into it fairly often. IMO it’s common enough that I am surprised not to have run into a set of slang for it, or porn, and sex products based on it. Before anybody posts a link, I’m familiar with the Baby Jesus buttplug and Jesus Jackhammer dildo. What I haven’t seen are lines of videos featuring lapsed Catholic women seducing priests. [/QUOTE] That’s because those scenarios are mostly done as “Romances” (_Thornbirds_, anyone?). OTOH, there’s plenty of material under the nunsploitation (as in www dot \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_dot net) category 😃 ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2006, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/64 "2006-09-07T00:58:57Z")
Well, that site certainly provides an interesting way to kill an evening. ---
**Author:** ![HazelNutCoffee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ac91a4/32.png) [@HazelNutCoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HazelNutCoffee)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2006, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/65 "2006-09-07T03:56:50Z")
[QUOTE=Antigen] I didn’t know that having stink lines was a sin. Thank you, Mr. Chick, for showing me that a shower will get me into heaven! [/QUOTE] I nearly fell out of my chair laughing at that part. Poor child. Apparently cleanliness is not only next to godliness but a prerequisite of it. ---
**Author:** ![kingpengvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9dc877/32.png) [@kingpengvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kingpengvin)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2006, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/66 "2006-09-07T15:52:34Z")
Well, there seems to be a difference between the way we all meet the Faceless Lord on the toilet, isn’t there? Adults go to hell all nude and kids go fully dressed with or without stink lines. SO why are the adults going to God naked?!?! Is he a degenerate or does he just like laughing at our shortcomings HAW HAW HAW! ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2006, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/67 "2006-09-07T16:08:03Z")
[QUOTE=Antigen] I didn’t know that having stink lines was a sin. [/QUOTE] Yeah, what if the kid died rescuing a widow from a cesspool? And what about the _flies_ hovering around the stink lines? Are they doomed to Perdition as well? ---
**Author:** ![jacquilynne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/67e7ee/32.png) [@jacquilynne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jacquilynne)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2006, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/68 "2006-09-07T17:47:43Z")
I find the African-American versions utterly bizarre. They still have all the thick, dark line shading of the originals. And then they have the very delicately shaded faces. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2006, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/69 "2006-09-07T21:04:45Z")
[QUOTE=Freddy the Pig] Yeah, what if the kid died rescuing a widow from a cesspool? And what about the _flies_ hovering around the stink lines? Are they doomed to Perdition as well? [/QUOTE] Beelzebub is the lord of them, after all. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/70 "2006-09-11T06:53:53Z")
Well, here’s the email I sent to Chick’s people > [@Me in an email to the nutbags](#): > > Gentlemen, > > When I was in Junior High a fellow student, defying the anti-Christian stance of the public school that I attended, gave me one of Jack Chick’s tracts. Needless to say, it transformed my life. Not only did I find Jesus from reading that tract, but I also began to understand exactly how insidious Satan and his minions were. Mr. Chick’s pull-no-punches stance showed me that my teachers were wrong when they tried to teach evolution and that the people I thought were my friends, who played Dungeons and Dragons were pawns in Satan’s plan. Since then, I have been a regular church goer and have done everything I can to spread the word of Christ, using Mr. Chick’s wonderful publications in my battles against Satan. Imagine my disappointment when I saw Mr. Chick’s latest tract “Here Kitty, Kitty.” I simple do not understand how this could have been written by the same man who showed me that trick or treating was evil. The powerful message of Mr. Chick’s previous works was missing from this one. It just seemed to have NONE of the energy of his other tracts. God and Jesus both seem to be happy-go-lucky kind of folks, without any emotion at all. I’m sure that the man who wrote the earlier tracts would agree we were all sinners in the hand of an angry God. There was NO anger in this tract, instead, it was filled with a “ho hum” attitude. I have to wonder if Mr. Chick has some how lost his faith in Jesus. I simply will NOT be handing this tract, and any others like it, if Mr. Chick continues in this manner. This is NOT the Jesus that I know, and that Mr. Chick introduced me to. This is some sort of false god, and I, for one, am sorely disappointed that Mr. Chick has lost his way. > > This past year has been dominated by such godless Hollywood types as Tom Cruise who has been allowed by the media to spread his Satanic message that Scientology is the one true religion. Mr. Chick, in the past, has been willing to confront people like Tom Cruise head on, and I had hoped that Mr. Chick would finally create a tract that would blow the lid of Hollywood and the Satannic Scientologists who control it. That is not to be, I see, and I’m afraid that unless Mr. Chick returns to preaching the Word of the one true God, I will NOT be handing out his tracts. > > Yours in Christ, > Tuckerfan I’ll let you know if I get a response. ---
**Author:** ![Puzzler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d07c76/32.png) [@Puzzler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Puzzler)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/71 "2006-09-11T08:14:33Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] Well, here’s the email I sent to Chick’s peopleI’ll let you know if I get a response. [/QUOTE] ROFL 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kingpengvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9dc877/32.png) [@kingpengvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kingpengvin)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/72 "2006-09-11T16:04:41Z")
Damn at first I thought he’sm pouring it on too thick, but a follow up demanding Chick publications take on Scientology?!?! Now there is a battle Royal I’d love to witness! You know they won’t, but Damn It takes balls to demand that! Can’t wait for the response! ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/73 "2006-09-11T16:43:44Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#): > > I had hoped that Mr. Chick would finally create a tract that would blow the lid of Hollywood and the Satannic Scientologists who control it. Sir, you are now a god to me. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/74 "2006-09-11T18:13:17Z")
[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy] Say rather Don Marquis’s [Mehitabel,](http://www.krazy.com/archy.htm) as drawn by George Herriman. [/QUOTE] Never! If you remember, Mehitabel said she was “toujours gai” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Sweet\_Mercury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@Sweet\_Mercury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sweet_Mercury)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/75 "2006-09-11T20:31:00Z")
Amazing, as expected. Chick never ceases to amaze… ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/76 "2006-09-11T21:51:50Z")
**Tuckerfan wins.** I can’t wait for the response! I hope there is one… I gotta agree in principle that this new Chick tract is beyond lame. Calling it tepid does an injustice everywhere to teas left out too long to cool. It’s week. It’s feeble. It’s … _sigh_ Words fail me. Wheres the anger? The vitriol? Very disappointing. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/77 "2006-09-11T21:53:17Z")
Er…“weak,” even. It’s been a long week. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2006, 9:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/78 "2006-09-12T09:07:27Z")
[QUOTE=kingpengvin] Damn at first I thought he’sm pouring it on too thick, but a follow up demanding Chick publications take on Scientology?!?! Now there is a battle Royal I’d love to witness! You know they won’t, but Damn It takes balls to demand that! Can’t wait for the response! [/QUOTE] Gee, I hope I’m not losing my touch. Back when I was a poor, starving college student, my then [roommate](http://www.ericblumrich.com/) at the time and I, used to while away the hours writing letters to whacked out Christian fundie groups. We managed to get a couple of them to send us about $10K worth of books, flyers, and videotapes for free. 😃 > [@Cervaise](#): > > Sir, you are now a god to me. Coming from the guy who wrote the finest Pit thread I’ve ever read, I’m honored. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2006, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/79 "2006-09-16T10:06:16Z")
Guess what? I got’s me an email from Chick & Co.! > [@email from the nutbags to me](#): > > Dear **Tuckerfan** , > > Don’t worry **Tucker**. Nothing has changed. Some of our tracts are in-your-face and others are more gentle, like “One Way”, “Charlie’s Ants”, “Somebody Loves Me”, “The Little Ghost”, and this new one “Here, Kitty Kitty”, “that we might by all means save some” (I Cor. 9:22). Some are tracts written for kids. > > If “Hard-hitting” is what you want look at our newest book, “Babylon Religion”. It will be an eye-opener. And, wait until you see the tracts we have in store for 2007. > > You can also see the last tract we produced called, “Men of Peace”. You can read it online at [www.chick.com](http://www.chick.com) . > > We appreciate your interest in our materials and your taking the time to write to us. > > May God bless you. > > Your brother in Christ, > > Jack T. Chick, President > Chick Publications, Inc. > P.O. Box 3500, Ontario CA 91761 > JTC.kr > Web site: [http://www.chick.com](http://www.chick.com) > E-Mail: [postmaster@chick.com](mailto:postmaster@chick.com) > Visit our newest tract online at: > [Chick.com: Four Angels?](http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1026/1026_01.asp) > [Chick.com: Star, The](http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1028/1028_01.asp) > ----- Original Message ----- > From: “Postmaster” \ > To: “Karen Rockney” \ > Sent: Tuesday, September 12, 2006 9:36 AM > Subject: Fw: Latest Tract All I have to say is that if we _don’t_ get some good, narrowminded bigotry and hate mongering out of Chick next year, I’m gonna open a can of whoop ass on him! ---
**Author:** ![constanze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@constanze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/constanze)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2006, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473/80 "2006-09-16T14:19:00Z")
[QUOTE=Antigen] I didn’t know that having stink lines was a sin. Thank you, Mr. Chick, for showing me that a shower will get me into heaven! [/QUOTE] But it’s a shower in **blood!** Seriously, given the insistence in previous tracts about Jesus blood washing sins away, I wondered how the little girl would react when the teacher tells her “You have to be washed clean with blood!” (a sensible kid would have run away screaming and become an atheist after all this craziness.) Instead, we get the lame line of God having a “better way.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tract-here-kitty-kitty/371473.md?page=5)