# New Chick Tracts: "Evil Eyes" and "It's A Deal" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 27, 2009, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803 "2009-05-27T16:15:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2009, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/41 "2009-05-28T18:49:39Z")
> [@Lemur866](#): > > **Warning** : Any deal with the devil is phony. The world and the way it would be if Satan had to answer to the Federal Trade Commission. ---
**Author:** ![sqweels](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f19dbf/32.png) [@sqweels](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sqweels)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2009, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/42 "2009-05-28T19:47:25Z")
I feel an idea for a new reality show coming on… ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2009, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/43 "2009-05-28T21:49:14Z")
> [@Nicolas\_Bourbaki](#): > > Yeah, this is what I was about to post. What’s crazy is Pimp Satan actually delivered on every one of his promises, and didn’t collect until the week agreed on. Meanwhile, God breaks a contract He had no business butting into, just because He’s omnipotent and can do whatever He wants. I guess this trope isn’t confined to Chick tracts, but why is it the Devil’s the only honorable one? Maybe God’s just genre savvy and knows the protagonist can get away with that? > [@Scathach](#): > > Evil eyes definitely has the win. I cracked up when the priest was brought in > > “He _is_ a zombie!” “No John, you ARE the zombies” And then John was a demon. > [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](#): > > The world and the way it would be if Satan had to answer to the Federal Trade Commission. But Jack proved it isn’t phony, **Satan followed through on every promise he made, including the collection date.** He said Satan already had his soul anyway because he didn’t give it to Jesus, so it seems you have four options in the Chick-verse: 1. Do nothing and go to Hell. 2. Sell your soul to Satan for all kinds of swag and fame… and go to hell. 3. Give yourself to God, and live a mediocre to good life, but get heaven. 4. Sell your soul to Satan, get swag, then give yourself to Jesus at the last second to go back on the deal (isn’t that a sin?). ---
**Author:** ![Man\_from\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Man\_from\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_from_Mars)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2009, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/44 "2009-05-28T21:53:40Z")
That doctor in the black tract is a major douchebag. The sick man tells him he feels like he’s dying and his answer? “Yep, you sure are! I give you a week!” But he probably said the magic words and will be going to heaven so it doesn’t matter if his bedside manners are atrocious. ---
**Author:** ![Man\_from\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Man\_from\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_from_Mars)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2009, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/45 "2009-05-28T21:55:51Z")
In “Evil Eyes,” it looks like James Randi is no longer a skeptic. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2009, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/46 "2009-05-28T22:39:26Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > No wonder the Devil loses to God; that’s one bad business model. But he is going to make it up on volume! Hence Hollywood. ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2009, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/47 "2009-05-28T22:55:16Z")
**MeanOldLady** said: > [@](#): > > So what’s going on in “It’s A Deal” again? Did that Evil Tiny Lister dude get mad because some chicks were looking at a cell phone? His fiance was saying how much she wanted to have sex with Denzel’s brother. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2009, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/48 "2009-05-28T23:15:30Z")
Every time I read a new Chick tract, I’m convinced that stupid bastard can’t get any crazier. And every time, I find out different. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/49 "2009-05-29T00:50:49Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > But they’re Catholics. And everyone knows that Catholics aren’t Christians. Jesus said so in the Bible. In English. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/50 "2009-05-29T01:03:39Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > In English. In red letters. That’s how they knew he was the Messiah. ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/51 "2009-05-29T01:51:58Z")
I just don’t know why these fanatic Christians assign so much POWER to Satan. They make it seem like black magic and selling your soul to the devil actually works, albeit with disastrous consequences - what is this all about? I thought the Lord works through everything and everyone - how can this be reconciled with a slick white-suited pimp who can grant one magical basketball skills or musical success in exchange for a soul? It’s a Deal might have a stupid story but the art itself is amazing. I always like the Chick tracts that are drawn by that guy, whoever he is. The ones that Chick himself illustrates in his childish looking and sloppy drawing style - like Evil Eyes - always disappoint. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/52 "2009-05-29T03:19:39Z")
> [@](#): > > In English. In American. ---
**Author:** ![KGS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/90ced4/32.png) [@KGS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KGS)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/53 "2009-05-29T07:59:07Z")
> [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > They make it seem like black magic and selling your soul to the devil actually works, albeit with disastrous consequences. I’ve tried selling my soul to Satan, many times, but Satan doesn’t want it. Man, talk about feeling rejected. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 11:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/54 "2009-05-29T11:27:49Z")
> [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > I just don’t know why these fanatic Christians assign so much POWER to Satan. Because they need an excuse for why their all-powerful, all-loving god can’t just make the world a utopia. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/55 "2009-05-29T12:50:13Z")
> [@Grumman](#): > > Because they need an excuse for why their all-powerful, all-loving god can’t just make the world a utopia. It also makes more sense & more drama storywise. If Satan is helpless, then why is he even relevant ? And why would he have even tried rebelling ? And where is the whole dramatic struggle of good vrs evil if evil is helpless ? Basically, the ancient mythmakers made the same mistake that the writers of Superman did but even more so; they made the good guy too strong by piling on the omni-omni-omnis to have believable enemies, and made finding conflict for the story difficult. ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/56 "2009-05-29T14:32:18Z")
> [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > It’s a Deal might have a stupid story but the art itself is amazing. I always like the Chick tracts that are drawn by that guy, whoever he is. Fred Carter, a black pastor, btw. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/57 "2009-05-29T14:43:56Z")
> [@Irishman](#): > > **MeanOldLady** said: > > > [@](#): > > > > So what’s going on in “It’s A Deal” again? Did that Evil Tiny Lister dude get mad because some chicks were looking at a cell phone? > > His fiance was saying how much she wanted to have sex with Denzel’s brother. He should have shot his whore fiance. And who yells “Gotcha” when shooting somebody? Classic all around. ---
**Author:** ![42fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/4/b487fb/32.png) [@42fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/42fish)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/58 "2009-05-29T15:47:49Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > And who yells “Gotcha” when shooting somebody? Classic all around. Would have been even better had he yelled “Gotcha ya.” ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/59 "2009-05-29T16:23:14Z")
Why is the demon cast out of Carlos wearing Groucho glasses? ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2009, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803/60 "2009-05-29T16:26:21Z")
Groucho glasses are the latest thing with the demon crowd. New hotness…not old and busted. Of course, demonic tastes (slightly sulfurous with a hint of lime) are notoriously bad. I think it’s the heat… -XT [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-chick-tracts-evil-eyes-and-its-a-deal/497803.md?page=4)