# New HBO Series - Big Love **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 13, 2006, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294 "2006-02-13T17:27:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![iluvurmom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iluvurmom/32/7276_2.png) [@iluvurmom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iluvurmom)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/1 "2006-02-13T17:27:57Z")
Okay, so someone help me out here. A friend of mine has been talking about this new HBO show called Big Love that is supposded to be a cross between DH and Six Feet Under. I love both of those shows and I saw this post card for it that read “I Dooo” (with three wedding rings)…does anyone know anythinbg about this…anything more about what its about?? I hear Bill Paxton is the main character…gimme something here people. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/2 "2006-02-13T17:29:33Z")
What’s DH? ---
**Author:** ![PinkMarabou](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@PinkMarabou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PinkMarabou)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/3 "2006-02-13T17:30:38Z")
Here’s the description from [HBO.com](http://HBO.com): > [@](#): > > He has three wives who willingly share him between their three adjoining houses, but Bill Henrickson is about to find out just how challenging life as a modern-day polygamist can be. Don’t miss the bold new series that Time magazine says “may prove to be… the next cool thing on TV.” Starring Bill Paxton, Jeanne Tripplehorn, Chloë Sevigny, Ginnifer Goodwin and Harry Dean Stanton. Airing Sundays at 10pm beginning March 12th, immediately following Season Six of The Sopranos®. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/4 "2006-02-13T17:33:49Z")
I’m sorry, but there’s nothing “cool” about polygamy. I don’t see how a character like this could be sympathetic. ---
**Author:** ![PinkMarabou](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@PinkMarabou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PinkMarabou)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/5 "2006-02-13T17:38:33Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > I’m sorry, but there’s nothing “cool” about polygamy. I don’t see how a character like this could be sympathetic. Polygamy wouldn’t work for me either, but I’m definitely interested in the show. As most HBO series are pretty well-done (can’t wait for the new Rome season). It’s quite an interesting concept, I can’t recall any other shows broaching this topic. ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/6 "2006-02-13T17:41:18Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > I’m sorry, but there’s nothing “cool” about polygamy. I don’t see how a character like this could be sympathetic. 😕 If, in the context of the show, the main character and his wives are all “on-board” and have no problems with it, then there’s no harm. There is a distinct difference between polygamy and cheating on a spouse. In the former, all parties are aware of the goings on and are ok with it. Many people practice polygamy quite happily. You might not find it, or the show, cool, and that’s fine, you don’t have to watch it. But many people are intrigued by the idea, and might be able to sympathize with the main character. ---
**Author:** ![jali](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ecae2f/32.png) [@jali](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jali)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/7 "2006-02-13T17:51:34Z")
> [@](#): > > I’m sorry, but there’s nothing “cool” about polygamy. I don’t see how a character like this could be sympathetic. I’m looking forward to it. I don’t condone “the family practices” but I watch The Sopranos. I’m not a drug dealer or a criminal but I loved “The Wire.” Never been to jail but “Oz” was one of my favorites. I don’t think that polygamy is cool but a show about it just might be. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/8 "2006-02-13T17:54:56Z")
> [@bouv](#): > > 😕 > > If, in the context of the show, the main character and his wives are all “on-board” and have no problems with it, then there’s no harm. There is a distinct difference between polygamy and cheating on a spouse. In the former, all parties are aware of the goings on and are ok with it. Many people practice polygamy quite happily. > > You might not find it, or the show, cool, and that’s fine, you don’t have to watch it. But many people are intrigued by the idea, and might be able to sympathize with the main character. The fact that some women might (superficially) seem to accept being degraded in such a fashion does not make the practice less degrading to them. It’s also a crime. I just can’t feel any sympathy for a guy who would treat women this way and I shudder to think what it does to any children. I know this isn’t Great Debates, so I’ll leave the thread. A show about a guy with harem just isn’t my cup of tea. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/9 "2006-02-13T17:57:05Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > I’m sorry, but there’s nothing “cool” about polygamy. I don’t see how a character like this could be sympathetic. They’re all agreeing to it. Why are you singling out the man? If they’re all willing participants, what’s the problem? ---
**Author:** ![BobT](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e8cbc/32.png) [@BobT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobT)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/10 "2006-02-13T18:12:32Z")
I’m guessing that the “DH” in the OP stands for “Desperate Housewives”. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/11 "2006-02-13T18:16:30Z")
> [@Kalhoun](#): > > They’re all agreeing to it. Why are you singling out the man? If they’re all willing participants, what’s the problem? Women only agree to crap like that if they were raped as toddlers or something. It’s not healthy or normal. People make the same excuse about women who do porn. They seem to be doing it voluntarily but the majority of them are reenacting some kind of childhood trauma. A normal, healthy woman would normal self-esteem does not want to be part of a harem. If you had a daughter would you want her to be some dickhole’s wife number 3? ---
**Author:** ![PinkMarabou](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@PinkMarabou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PinkMarabou)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/12 "2006-02-13T18:31:24Z")
> [@jali](#): > > I’m looking forward to it. > > I don’t condone “the family practices” but I watch The Sopranos. I’m not a drug dealer or a criminal but I loved “The Wire.” Never been to jail but “Oz” was one of my favorites. > > I don’t think that polygamy is cool but a show about it just might be. I really think HBO does a wonderful job with their Original Series and their movies (Angels in America, etc.), so count me in as looking forward to another great story line. I agree that having a show about something doesn’t necessarily glorify a practice some people find unpalatable, I think this will be another welcome learning experience for me (and many others) who are not privy to this type of family style. ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/13 "2006-02-13T18:41:32Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > If you had a daughter would you want her to be some dickhole’s wife number 3? I’m a daughter, and I’m a third wife. Only difference is that I’m in a sequence rather than coincidental (or whatever the word should be). The world is full of families who share spouses, moms, dads, grandparents. I trust HBO to come up with something thought-provoking about family structure, trust, cooperation and competition, dealing with jealousy, etc. ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/14 "2006-02-13T18:48:47Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > The fact that some women might (superficially) seem to accept being degraded in such a fashion does not make the practice less degrading to them. It’s also a crime. > > I just can’t feel any sympathy for a guy who would treat women this way and I shudder to think what it does to any children. It must be very convenient for you, knowing how every woman thinks, even if they don’t. How is it that you’re not getting laid every minute of the day? ---
**Author:** ![Improv\_Geek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b3f665/32.png) [@Improv\_Geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Improv_Geek)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/15 "2006-02-13T18:53:11Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > Women only agree to crap like that if they were raped as toddlers or something. It’s not healthy or normal. People make the same excuse about women who do porn. They seem to be doing it voluntarily but the majority of them are reenacting some kind of childhood trauma. A normal, healthy woman would normal self-esteem does not want to be part of a harem. > > If you had a daughter would you want her to be some dickhole’s wife number 3? Wow, that’s quite an inflammatory comment. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/16 "2006-02-13T19:20:01Z")
Apparently I’ve stepped into an alternate universe where it’s now acceptable to treat women like property again. I didn’t realize that respecting women as equals was considered to be “immflammatory” around here. Like I said, this isn’t GD. I’m just going to leave the thread now. > [@Auntie Pam](#): > > I’m a daughter, and I’m a third wife. Only difference is that I’m in a sequence rather than coincidental (or whatever the word should be). That’s not the same thing and you know it. Is it ok if your husbnd get’s another wife right now? Would you want your own daughter to be part of a harem? ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/17 "2006-02-13T19:37:38Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > Apparently I’ve stepped into an alternate universe where it’s now acceptable to treat women like property again. I didn’t realize that respecting women as equals was considered to be “immflammatory” around here. > > Like I said, this isn’t GD. I’m just going to leave the thread now. > > That’s not the same thing and you know it. Is it ok if your husbnd get’s another wife right now? Would you want your own daughter to be part of a harem? Do you only watch shows with characters that have high morals? Shows have lead characters in them that do horrible things all the time. Treating women as non-equals _is_ bad, cheating on your spouse is bad, murdering another person is bad, stealing is bad, but Tony Soprano, for example, does these things all the time. Flawed characters are what make _interesting_ characters. A show or book or movie that can take highly flawed characters and show a human side to them, all the while never candy-coating the obvious flaws, make some of the best entertainment. Can you at least agree upon that? I don’t think anyone here is saying polygamy is good, or that treating women like property is good. We’re talking about a fictional character on a TV series. Creating, and subsequently watching, a TV series with flawed characters doesn’t mean you endorse the flaws. ---
**Author:** ![Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/bc8723/32.png) [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unauthorized_Cinnamon)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/18 "2006-02-13T19:37:49Z")
I’m definitely going to check out that show. In the meantime, I’ve started a [GD thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=7099347#post7099347) on the polygamy issue. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/19 "2006-02-13T19:47:55Z")
> [@Happy Lendervedder](#): > > Do you only watch shows with characters that have high morals? Shows have lead characters in them that do horrible things all the time. Treating women as non-equals _is_ bad, cheating on your spouse is bad, murdering another person is bad, stealing is bad, but Tony Soprano, for example, does these things all the time. > > Flawed characters are what make _interesting_ characters. A show or book or movie that can take highly flawed characters and show a human side to them, all the while never candy-coating the obvious flaws, make some of the best entertainment. Can you at least agree upon that? > > I don’t think anyone here is saying polygamy is good, or that treating women like property is good. We’re talking about a fictional character on a TV series. Creating, and subsequently watching, a TV series with flawed characters doesn’t mean you endorse the flaws. You’re right. It’s absolutely unecessary to have to like the characters in order to enjoy a show. Many of the the shows I enjoy the most have unsavory characters (including a couple of other HBO shows, _The sopranos_, and _Deadwood_). In fact, i would go so far as to say that amoral or even evil characters are almost always more interesting than “good” characters. My initia impression with reading the (albeit sketchy) description of the show was that this particular lifestyle was being portrayed as “cool” or at least acceptable. My reflex was that it struck me as creepy male fantasy. It doesn’t have to be “moral” to be good, obviously, but I guess I don’t find the subject inherently interesting at any level. I don’t enjoy relationship dramas and unles there’s going to be lot of violence or something I just think I would be bored by this. ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2006, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294/20 "2006-02-13T20:28:13Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > That’s not the same thing and you know it. Is it ok if your husbnd get’s another wife right now? Would you want your own daughter to be part of a harem? I’m not sure. I wouldn’t reject it out of hand. That’s why I’m looking forward to HBO’s take on it. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-hbo-series-big-love/344294.md?page=2)