# New Maps of Hell . . .

**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462
**Category:** Great Debates
**Created:** [January 28, 2000, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462 "2000-01-28T16:52:00Z")
**Posts on this page:** 10
**Page:** 1

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### Author: ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [January 28, 2000, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462/1 "2000-01-28T16:52:00Z")

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DavidB’s mention of “ironic” hells in the “What in Hell?” thread got me to wondering – let’s say you’re the guy whose job it is to come up with an appropriately ironic hell for certain souls. What would you devise?

Strom Thurmond – doomed to forever be the gofer boy in a Southern brothel where white women come to be suhvissed by priapic Knee-grow studs . . .

Rip Taylor – condemned to live off confetti forever while listening to Waylon & Madam albums . . .

Ready? Set? Go!

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“Television should be so real that when you close your eyes, it sounds like radio!” – Guess who, where and win a prize . . .

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### Author: ![Navigator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/4af34b/32.png) [@Navigator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Navigator)
#### Post date: [January 28, 2000, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462/2 "2000-01-28T16:56:00Z")

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Hmmm…

something having to do with posting on, or reading a message board where threads are never where they should be??

😉

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† Jon †  
Phillipians 4:13

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### Author: ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)
#### Post date: [January 29, 2000, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462/3 "2000-01-29T06:12:00Z")

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And here I thought this thread was going to promote my new game, “Where in Hell is Carmen Sandiego?”, with clues referencing Dante’s Inferno. 😉

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### Author: ![Gilligan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Gilligan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gilligan)
#### Post date: [January 29, 2000, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462/4 "2000-01-29T06:27:00Z")

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Well, from what I’ve been reading here lately…

[http://maps.yahoo.com/py/maps.py?Pyt=Tmap&addr=&csz=Chicago&Get%A0Map=Get+Map](http://maps.yahoo.com/py/maps.py?Pyt=Tmap&addr=&csz=Chicago&Get%A0Map=Get+Map)

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### Author: ![OJSimpson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/b487fb/32.png) [@OJSimpson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OJSimpson)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2000, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462/5 "2000-02-13T08:06:00Z")

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basketball is fun

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### Author: ![RoboDude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bbe5ce/32.png) [@RoboDude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RoboDude)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2000, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462/6 "2000-02-13T17:21:00Z")

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Fred Phelps - Put him in a cell with all the former prisoners who liked to rape other inmates.

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Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

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### Author: ![Surgoshan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Surgoshan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surgoshan)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2000, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462/7 "2000-02-13T17:54:00Z")

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Hmm, yeah, this probably belongs in MPSIMS, but I like it.

Actually, Phelps should spend his time in Fairey land where everyone is either submissive or dominant, and male. hehe

Jerry Falwell should be forced to live in the same hell as phelps, and know that phelps is there, but never see him.

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I sold my soul to Satan for a dollar. I got it in the mail.

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### Author: ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2000, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462/8 "2000-02-13T19:43:00Z")

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All religious fundamentalists will go to hell. For them, hell will be heaven except that everybody else from all the other religions will be there too.

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### Author: ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2000, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462/9 "2000-02-13T20:09:00Z")

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I think my personal hell would be to be trapped in this message board with no other posters than OJSimpson, SpaceJackson, Phaedrus, MikeyLikesIt, and DannyBoy.

Oh, and occasionally FORMERAGENT and GigoloMan lay down sniper fire.

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JMCJ

This is not a sig.

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### Author: ![Surgoshan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Surgoshan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surgoshan)
#### Post date: [February 13, 2000, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-maps-of-hell/17462/10 "2000-02-13T22:41:00Z")

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John, you do realize that those are all the same person, don’t you?

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I sold my soul to Satan for a dollar. I got it in the mail.
