# New Planet Discovered With Life

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [April 28, 2007, 11:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947 "2007-04-28T11:16:44Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\
**Post date:** [April 28, 2007, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/21 "2007-04-28T19:23:41Z")

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[QUOTE=Lizard]  
Something that’s good with cream sauce.  
[/QUOTE]

“Qu’ils mangent de la brioche”.

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**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/22 "2007-04-29T02:31:13Z")

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[QUOTE=cmyk]  
Humans. Exactly like us\*, and watch the collective minds of earth shit themselves.

\*in reality, I couldn’t imagine a more fascinating yet disappointing fact than this.  
[/QUOTE]

If you find humans, maybe the humans there sent humans here knowing they were going to be doomed into the future. They won’t want us coming back.

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**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/23 "2007-04-29T02:47:35Z")

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I want the men to have deep resonant voices like James Earl Jones, and the women to look and sound like Kathkeen Turner in _Body Heat_, but not be murderers.

I want loyal, obedient cats.

I want healthy food that tastes like ice cream and chocolate donuts.

I want an atmosphere that is partly nitrous oxide so we’re always smiling while visiting.

What was that planet on \*Star Trek \* where your dreams become reality? I want that.

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**Author:** ![Captain\_C](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Captain\_C](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_C)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/24 "2007-04-29T02:50:35Z")

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Ewoks, and lots of them. I want something we could actually defeat in a war for once!

_rimshot_

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**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/25 "2007-04-29T02:53:53Z")

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[QUOTE=Captain\_C]  
Ewoks, and lots of them. I want something we could actually defeat in a war for once!

_rimshot_  
[/QUOTE]

NOooooo! No fuckin’ meat muppets please.

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**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/26 "2007-04-29T03:16:25Z")

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[QUOTE=cmyk]  
Humans. Exactly like us\*, and watch the collective minds of earth shit themselves.

\*in reality, I couldn’t imagine a more fascinating yet disappointing fact than this.  
[/QUOTE]

This, only not _exactly_ like us. I’d kinda like them to be way more advanced, to the point where they’ve genetically engineered sharks to have lasers built into their eyeballs and stuff.

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**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/27 "2007-04-29T04:02:45Z")

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[QUOTE=Boyo Jim]  
What was that planet on \*Star Trek \* where your dreams become reality? I want that.  
[/QUOTE]  
Ah, _Admiral_ Kirk…we meet again. Welcome…to Fantasy Planet! Now, just let me stick this worm in your ear…

Stranger

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**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/28 "2007-04-29T04:24:54Z")

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Does anyone know if the christians are prepared for this possibility? Many have kinda given up on creationism (now it’s “intelligent design”). How are they gonna handle Ewoks? Eat them?  
I’m for that.  
Mmmm. Ewoks.

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**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/29 "2007-04-29T04:31:43Z")

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Perhaps they are on the way here.  
Let’s hope it turns out better than [The Day The Earth Stood Still.](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0043456/)

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**Author:** ![threnodyangelfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@threnodyangelfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/threnodyangelfire)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/30 "2007-04-29T05:30:03Z")

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[QUOTE=mangeorge]  
Does anyone know if the christians are prepared for this possibility? Many have kinda given up on creationism (now it’s “intelligent design”). How are they gonna handle Ewoks? Eat them?  
I’m for that.  
Mmmm. Ewoks.  
[/QUOTE]

How would one skin an ewok?

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**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/31 "2007-04-29T05:38:49Z")

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[QUOTE=threnodyangelfire]  
How would one skin an ewok?  
[/QUOTE]

Pretty much like you’d skin a German Shepherd.

Or Yoda.

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**Author:** ![Queen\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Queen\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Bruin)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/32 "2007-04-29T05:41:53Z")

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[QUOTE=threnodyangelfire]  
How would one skin an ewok?  
[/QUOTE]

You just gotta unzip them.

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**Author:** ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/33 "2007-04-29T05:43:13Z")

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[QUOTE=Boyo Jim]  
I want healthy food that tastes like ice cream and chocolate donuts.  
[/QUOTE]  
Are you implying that there is something unhealthy about ice cream and chocolate donuts?

Tris

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**Author:** ![enigm4tic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@enigm4tic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enigm4tic)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/34 "2007-04-29T07:49:45Z")

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[QUOTE=threnodyangelfire]  
How would one skin an ewok?  
[/QUOTE]

well I’m sure there’s more than one way…  
::d+r::

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**Author:** ![pool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pool/32/4152_2.png) [@pool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pool)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 8:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/35 "2007-04-29T08:35:54Z")

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Remember that episode of outer limits, To Serve Man? I’m picturing something like that happening.

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**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 8:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/36 "2007-04-29T08:55:44Z")

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Just to give some perspective: At this point, finding blue-green algae on another planet would be mind-blowing dampen-your-pants exciting. Multicellular life would be epic beyond all comprehension.

That said, I’m rooting for silicon-based life. Not computers or robots, but organic life not based on organic chemistry (defined as carbon-based).

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**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 9:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/37 "2007-04-29T09:13:19Z")

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If we found something that close, I think that mankind, knowing our illustrious track record, would screw up interstellar diplomacy if we realized we had the “upper hand” (ie: we were the more advanced species).

I think the life is going to be more unicellular than anything, but that’s still wildly nifty-neat-keen-sweet.

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**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 9:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/38 "2007-04-29T09:26:34Z")

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This is very exciting. We know that on Earth, life emerged almost immediately, and if that holds true, then this planet has had life for far longer than the Earth.

But I hope that we find life there in an emergent form, so we can seed it with terrestrial flora and fauna. And then colonise it in due course.

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**Author:** ![if6was9](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47c2d/32.png) [@if6was9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/if6was9)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 9:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/39 "2007-04-29T09:51:01Z")

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[QUOTE=threnodyangelfire]  
What kind of life do YOU want it to have?  
[/QUOTE]

Any kind at all. Any. Take us… 50 to 100 years to find out for sure…

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**Author:** ![dnooman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/839c29/32.png) [@dnooman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dnooman)\
**Post date:** [April 29, 2007, 9:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-planet-discovered-with-life/401947/40 "2007-04-29T09:54:55Z")

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Guys, keep this on the d/l. I just saw a memo in the Universal HR office that I wasn’t supposed to see. It looks like once Bush is out of power, we will all be CC’d with the Regional Plan for Galactic improvement.

There’s going to be a lot of shifting in middle management, and NASA is going to be outsourced, but the overall effect will be great for the Earth brand.

I, for one, welcome our new and more cost-efficient, goal oriented overlords. I hear good things from Corporate Prime about our new regional Deities. Looks like the GOP is gonna be absorbed by House Harkonnen though, so that might be a bit rough.

I hear that the Starbucks brand life support gel is going to be available in “mocha latte” so things are looking up.

FYI anal probes are now every _2_ hours on the hour, instead of 3. We really need to beat planet Dildonar in order to win that group outing to Red Lobsterman. We all know how much Janice in accounting loves those buttered Venutian crab penises!

P.S. This Friday is “bring your clone to work day”. I hope we don’t have any more unfortunate incidents with security this year, please show up together and with the proper PCR results. Nobody likes an on the spot spinal tap.

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