# New Posters You Like **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 8, 2000, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873 "2000-05-08T03:31:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Shayna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shayna/32/17976_2.png) [@Shayna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shayna)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2000, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/21 "2000-05-08T20:14:02Z")
**All of them**. The more, the merrier I say. Party on! šŸ˜ƒ **And Welcome, Newbies!** ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2000, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/22 "2000-05-08T20:26:03Z")
Iā€™m so new that I thought all the newbies favorites everyone has been listing are old regulars. I really like SingleDad, Green Bean, and everyone else who was listed. BTW, if I have stepped on anyoneā€™s toes since starting to post, please chalk it up to ignorance of the rules and internet language. I have squat experience with message boards; SDMB is my first and only. Iā€™ve done a search on internet lingo on the 'net to educate myself, and have turned up little or nothing. In addition, yā€™all have your own sub-dialect here, as well. I donā€™t suppose thereā€™s a posting of definitions anywhere? That would take all the fun out of it. You guys are SMART, FUNNY, and ADDICTIVE. My husbandā€™s getting jealous. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2000, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/23 "2000-05-08T20:27:37Z")
Well, apparently I was FlatuLanceā€™s favorite, but that goes to show you. _sigh_ I get one admirer, and 1.) Heā€™s a guy. 2.) He gets banned in mere seconds. The horrorā€¦the horrorā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2000, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/24 "2000-05-08T20:30:09Z")
Newbies, eh? That gives me an ideaā€¦ Roll up! Roll up! Come gitch yor gen-u-wine one-hunnerd percent authentic BBQ Pit Briquettes right here! Only US$10.00 per briquette! No self-respecting newbie should be seen without (at least) one! Roast your own mod! Also hot today: make sure you donā€™t leave home without your ā€œI Witnessed The LBMB Miracleā€ T-shirts - beautifully crafted from the purest cotton and guaranteed to leave behind a bitter aftertaste (with a few shining exceptions)\*. Also available: remember your favourite Great Debate with special commemorative plates - from the golden era of ā€œCircus Discrimination in the '90s: Funfair Dismissalā€ to ā€œAsk The Bag Fetishist: Whatā€™s It Like Being Bi-Satchel?ā€. And for those long, winter nights across the SD world, you simply must have the SDMB ā€œFlogging A Dead Horseā€ scarf, in one of four designs: ā€œGun Control Greenā€, ā€œCreationism Charcoalā€, ā€œLibertarian Lilacā€ or ā€œSock Puppet Salmonā€. Pass those wintry days with 6ft of delicately woven posts to stimulate your mind and irritate the bowels. Please make all cheques possible to ā€œmattk, c/o ā€˜This Joke Is Wearing Thinā€™, London, UKā€. - not a guarantee ---
**Author:** ![pluto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f08c70/32.png) [@pluto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pluto)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2000, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/25 "2000-05-08T20:39:20Z")
Bring 'em on!! Just more fodder for the cannons of our wit!! They are the most refreshing and enjoyable while theyā€™re still young and tender. (See **Ukulele Ikeā€™s** recipe for **Jazzmineā€™s** little ducklings!) There seems to be a life-cycle of sorts for posters to this board. People drop off all the time for various reasons (most of which boil down to getting a life!) and we need fresh flesh. Those who survive the initial hazing (we prefer the term ā€œtroll screeningā€) are usually among the best. Then there are the old posters who just wonā€™t go awayā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2000, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/26 "2000-05-08T20:46:06Z")
I want to be the first to admit that I am in love with MrCynical. Purely platonic, mind you, but heā€™s absolutely wonderful. MagicalSilverKey is currently helping me through an incredibly boring day at work, so he gets a mention on the list just for that. Heā€™s also pretty funā€¦and that golfball story still cracks me up. Gadarene is coolā€“I love a good Great Debate poster. I refuse to count SingleDad, because in a few months, heā€™s damn near got as many posts as I do. Ditto for Esprix, who may have already passed me. I think theyā€™re wonderful and cool and neato-keen, but theyā€™re not newbies at all. Iā€™m sure Iā€™ll think of more. ---
**Author:** ![Nacho4Sara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Nacho4Sara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nacho4Sara)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2000, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/27 "2000-05-08T20:55:52Z")
Wow, I wasnā€™t expecting everyone to be soā€¦levelheaded. I thought all you old-timers would yell at me and I would be forced to leaveā€¦but I tend to overreact. I think it was one post in the BBQ pit that terrified me (I forget the name of the poster, and it was my first visit down there). It was basically about how us newbies are ruining the board, then I saw a lot of people agree, which upset me (not that my temper is harsh of anything, hence the ā€œCanā€™t we all just get along?ā€ šŸ™‚ ) Anyway, I love being able to discuss stuff here, because the threads make me THINK in capitals, especially the GD (although I have yet to post here). I love that I can share my opinion and I donā€™t get attacked. Itā€™s like those late-night discussions I have with my deeper, more intelligent friends that open my mind. So, welcome to everyone who is new, I like you all! ---
**Author:** ![Babar714](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/779978/32.png) [@Babar714](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Babar714)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2000, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/28 "2000-05-08T21:23:46Z")
I didnā€™t post another Babar Recruits post with Flup, because of what happened last time I did. I donā€™t think Everyoneā€™sMom is even a member. But Flup is a good guy, has a creative mind, and a razor sharp wit. And he really is that weird. ---
**Author:** ![jazzmine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jazzmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jazzmine)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2000, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/29 "2000-05-08T21:25:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > Bring 'em on!! Just more fodder for the cannons of our wit!! They are the most refreshing and enjoyable while theyā€™re still young and tender. (See **Ukulele Ikeā€™s** recipe for **Jazzmineā€™s** little ducklings!) > \*\* Oh god, the horror. Newbies, beware. Ike was gonna actually _eat_ the ducklings. So, each of you bring the dipping sauce that best compliments you to pass out to one and all while youā€™re being cooking with lemon grass. trisha ---
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2000, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/30 "2000-05-08T21:45:03Z")
In addition to many of the others mentioned already, I have to give a special shout out to **beakerxf**. She fulfilled a long-time dream of mine when she posted a ā€œWhy do people hate gaysā€ thread in GQ that _actually was a GQ thread_ and didnā€™t have to go to Great Debates. So sheā€™s pretty much a demi-goddess to me. She can get the promotion to full Goddess if she can help me straighten out my stroke. (Thatā€™s _golf_, you deves!) Oh, and as long as Iā€™m in the thread, let me offer a teensy bit of advice to those newbies who may be reading this thread. **Nacho4Sara** said > [@](#): > > I think it was one post in the BBQ pit that terrified meā€¦ Iā€™ve found that the best way to enter the SD ā€œcommunityā€ is to _stay out of the Pit_. Yes, there are some generalized rant threads there that look fun, but thereā€™s really no way to jump in down there and win. Especially in the ā€œnewbieā€ threads. Most times, itā€™s just someone blowing off steam about one or more _specific_ newbies that ticked the poster off. Donā€™t take it personally. Stick to the other forums for a time. Speaking for GQ, I canā€™t remember a time when _anyone_ gave a newbie a hard time if the person asked a good question or (better still) provided a good answer. Just ignore (or learn from) the spelling and grammar police, and youā€™ll do just fine. ---
**Author:** ![beakerxf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc79bd/32.png) [@beakerxf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beakerxf)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2000, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/31 "2000-05-09T00:35:52Z")
> [@](#): > > In addition to many of the others mentioned already, I have to give a special shout out to **beakerxf**. She fulfilled a long-time dream of mine when she posted a ā€œWhy do people hate gaysā€ thread in GQ that _actually was a GQ thread_ and didnā€™t have to go to Great Debates. So sheā€™s pretty much a demi-goddess to me. She can get the promotion to full Goddess if she can help me straighten out my stroke. (Thatā€™s _golf_, you deves!) Itā€™s all in how you align your shoulders. Here let me show youā€¦ [Beaker pretends to know how to swing a golf club] See? Just like that. Now, you try it. Actually, couldnā€™t I demonstrate how to bat instead? I could show you how to slam it out of the park in about a week. ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2000, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/32 "2000-05-09T01:04:34Z")
> [@](#): > > Iā€™ve found that the best way to enter the SD ā€œcommunityā€ is to stay out of the Pit. Iā€™ve been at this board for over a year, and Iā€™ve got over 2000 posts, and the Pit _still_ scares the crap out of me. Staying out of there for a while is indeed the best advice a newbie can get. Also, try & listen when people try to correct you on your _facts._ If youā€™ve said ā€œ2+2=5,ā€ and someone says ā€œHey you! 2+2=4!ā€ just say ā€œOops! Sorry about that!ā€ Of course, if you have incontrovertible evidence that 2+2 does indeed equal 5, weā€™re happy to hear it. Thereā€™s a _huge_ difference between a ā€œnewbieā€ and a ā€œtroll.ā€ Most of us here have a thing about trolls. I myself try hard not to feed them, but I have been sucked in a few times. As for newbies, well, we were all newbies once. I find it difficult to say that SingleDad is a ā€œnewbie.ā€ I suppose, if you go by the registration date, he kinda is. But he assimilated (resistance really _is_ futile) really, really fast. One that Iā€™ve got my eye on is pepperlandgirl. Sheā€™s got potential. Really. And thereā€™s a post by someone whoā€™s name I cannot remember in Coldfireā€™s ā€œMay 4, 1945ā€ thread that is probably the _best_ first post that Iā€™ve ever read. That person _needs_ to post more. ---
**Author:** ![pluto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f08c70/32.png) [@pluto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pluto)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2000, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/33 "2000-05-09T01:33:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\*And thereā€™s a post by someone whoā€™s name I cannot remember in Coldfireā€™s ā€œMay 4, 1945ā€ thread that is probably the _best_ first post that Iā€™ve ever read. That person _needs_ to post more. \*\* That would be **London\_Calling** ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2000, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/34 "2000-05-09T01:38:10Z")
Like **pluto** said, **London\_calling**. His profile shows three posts but I canā€™t get the search engine to cough up the others. So, whereā€™s that **Geobabe** been; I thought she was a pretty good addition. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2000, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/35 "2000-05-09T01:39:55Z")
ooh, coulndā€™t agree more. That guyā€™s debut was awesome. I hope weā€™ll see more of him. London, if youā€™re lurking: show yourself. Weā€™d love to see more of your excellent writing. ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2000, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/36 "2000-05-09T01:57:11Z")
Well, I think all of these newbies have proved their worthiness. It is time to bestow the song! This is our sacred motto, sung in harmony at every doper debauch and get together: Who controls the British crown? Who keeps the metric system down? We do! We do. Who leaves the Atlantis off the maps? Who keeps the Martians under wraps? We do! We do. Who holds back the electric car? Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star? We do! We do. Who robs cave fish of their sight? Who rigs every Oscar night? We do! We do. Learn it. Know it. Live it. ---
**Author:** ![Osip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4491bb/32.png) [@Osip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Osip)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2000, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/37 "2000-05-09T02:10:32Z")
_kicking dirt_ Nobody loves Osip. _sigh_ Is ok, I reckon you all are ok anyhow. ---
**Author:** ![Talkinsquirrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f6c823/32.png) [@Talkinsquirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Talkinsquirrel)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2000, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/38 "2000-05-09T02:15:06Z")
::clears throat:: somebody gonna mention me right? ā˜¹ ---
**Author:** ![Squee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ba9def/32.png) [@Squee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squee)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2000, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/39 "2000-05-09T02:18:05Z")
With only 64+ posts, that **Cecil Adams** seems like a nice enough fella. I hope to read more of his writingā€¦ šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![Squee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ba9def/32.png) [@Squee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squee)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2000, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873/40 "2000-05-09T02:20:09Z")
With only 64+ posts, that **Cecil Adams** seems like a nice enough fella. I hope to read more of his writingā€¦ šŸ˜‰ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-posters-you-like/18873.md?page=3)