# NEW! Speak to me in Movie quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 7, 2020, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614 "2020-07-07T13:50:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 91
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2021, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1801 "2021-09-06T00:19:35Z")
Apocrypha Ecclesiasticus 30, Paragraph 22: ‘Gladness of the heart is the light of Man.’ Now, this is one of the ‘rejoicing,’ or ‘happy’ texts. A young member of our parish informed me that there are 800 such happy texts in the Bible. Well, she was wrong. There are, to be exact, 826. I know, because I stayed up most of last night counting them. I intend to read one every week. And that should take us, by my calculations, through sixteen years… if I’m around here that long. But I can promise you this, if I am here: our visits with God on Sunday are going to be happier, and more rejoicing too. What I have to say now is very difficult for me, but must be said. I look out to you now, and realize, after four years in this congregation, I don’t even know you. I look out to you now, not as my congregation, but as people. And I say to myself, how sad it is to have missed those four years… four years when we could have been friends. I should have been looking for the good in you, and I… I failed you… and I apologize for this. God is forgiving, but it’s not God’s forgiveness I beg, it is yours. I’m not going to speak about this any more now. It’s a lovely day outside. So let’s go out and enjoy this Sunday for a change. And while you’re out appreciating the sunlight, just give a little thought to who’s sending it down to you. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_stainless_steel_rat/32/5727_2.png) [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Stainless_Steel_Rat)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2021, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1802 "2021-09-06T14:38:33Z")
I could write shorter sermons but when I get started I’m too lazy to stop. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2021, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1803 "2021-09-06T16:58:31Z")
Oh, he gave me special instructions back of the pulpit Christmas Eve. He got to howlin’ “Repent! Repent!” and I got to moanin’ “Save me! Save me!” and the first thing I know he rammed the fear of God into me so fast I never heard my old man’s footsteps! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2021, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1804 "2021-09-06T17:11:34Z")
Jake: YES! YES! JESUS H. TAP-DANCING CHRIST… I HAVE SEEN THE LIGHT! ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2021, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1805 "2021-09-06T17:12:53Z")
My mind is in darkness. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2021, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1806 "2021-09-06T17:45:50Z")
One has only to see your dear face to know how near you are to heaven. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2021, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1807 "2021-09-06T21:27:01Z")
We’re No Angels ---
**Author:** ![Andy\_L](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c67d28/32.png) [@Andy\_L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Andy_L)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2021, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1808 "2021-09-07T12:22:18Z")
Somewhere up in heaven there’s an angel with big ears. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2021, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1809 "2021-09-07T12:57:44Z")
I think I will have seen most everything when I see an elephant fly. ---
**Author:** ![Quondam\_Mechanic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quondam_mechanic/32/3404_2.png) [@Quondam\_Mechanic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quondam_Mechanic)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2021, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1810 "2021-09-07T14:53:54Z")
This definitely rates about a 9.0 on my weird-shit-o-meter. ---
**Author:** ![Bayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bayaker/32/3454_2.png) [@Bayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2021, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1811 "2021-09-07T15:18:42Z")
You smoke that shit, everything kind of gets weird, you know what I mean? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_stainless_steel_rat/32/5727_2.png) [@The\_Stainless\_Steel\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Stainless_Steel_Rat)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2021, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1812 "2021-09-07T16:04:02Z")
She’s a dog person, Max. And dog people do weird, inexplicable things. Like… they get dogs instead of cats. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2021, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1813 "2021-09-07T18:14:15Z")
It just seems like a weird thing to do, bringing a dog into a house that already has a cat. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2021, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1814 "2021-09-07T19:51:48Z")
I’ve got a sheep dog. ---
**Author:** ![Ignatz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/3be4f8/32.png) [@Ignatz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ignatz)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2021, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1815 "2021-09-07T21:18:39Z")
…you guys wasn’t gettin’ paid to leave the dogs baby-sit the sheep while you stemmed the rose. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2021, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1816 "2021-09-07T21:45:10Z")
I always wondered what you straight guys did together. Oh, now that I know, I’m so glad I’m gay. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2021, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1817 "2021-09-08T18:34:09Z")
Any one of you homos putcha hands on me…and I kill ya … ---
**Author:** ![Bayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bayaker/32/3454_2.png) [@Bayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2021, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1818 "2021-09-08T19:15:53Z")
Put your hands on _me_, Jack. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2021, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1819 "2021-09-08T19:25:44Z")
Oh, Frank, my lips are hot! Kiss my hot lips! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2021, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614/1820 "2021-09-08T20:40:54Z")
You’re a hot dog, but you better not hurt her, Frankfurter! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614.md?page=90) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-speak-to-me-in-movie-quotes/914614.md?page=92)