# NEW Stupid Republican Idea of the Day (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 22, 2020, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140 "2020-06-22T07:01:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 176
**Author:** ![mikecurtis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikecurtis/32/3284_2.png) [@mikecurtis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mikecurtis)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3510 "2021-02-21T03:00:50Z")
“Our guy has bigger campaign rallies!” “Our guy has more twitface followers!” “Our guy has more online posts about his accomplishments!” “That proves our guy is better!” It’s all just so…juvenile. Like we’re stuck in 7th grade discussing who should be prom king. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 7:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3511 "2021-02-21T07:13:24Z")
> [@Railer13](#): > > The worst thing my right-wing FB friends are posting about Biden is that there are very few posts from the lefties touting his accomplishments in his first month. Do they not read the Dope? We have at least two entire threads devoted to Biden’s accomplishments. (The “Extricating from the Imbroglio” thread and the “First 1500 days” thread.) ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3512 "2021-02-21T07:15:55Z")
> [@SingleMalt](#): > > Wait… > So the evil mirror universe Ted Cruz is an _even more evil_ Ted Cruz? > Figures. There must be a Good Ted Cruz in some Universe out there somewhere. But does he have a beard? I think Cruz has that ugly scraggly beard lately because he’s secretly converted to Islam. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3513 "2021-02-21T11:55:28Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > I think Cruz has that ugly scraggly beard lately because he’s secretly converted to Islam. - Is there a punishment in Islam for converting _to_ the religion? ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_McQwark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4da419/32.png) [@Steve\_McQwark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_McQwark)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3514 "2021-02-21T15:22:18Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > I think Cruz has that ugly scraggly beard lately because he’s secretly converted to Islam. QAnon Publishing appreciates your conspiracy theory submission, but we’re afraid it’s a little too plausible to meet our standards. We do think it shows great promise and we encourage you to continue working on it. Perhaps you could add a love triangle with Ilhan Omar as a reason for his conversion. Or, maybe something along the lines of a pedophilia cabal, they’re always popular in CT circles. Please contact us again when you’ve developed this CT a little more. We’re always looking for exciting new talent. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3515 "2021-02-21T15:57:28Z")
It covers his neck. It covers his cheeks and his jawline. And there’s this ugly patch right on his chin that is bald. If he can’t grow hair there, he should remove the rest of his beard because it makes his chin look scabrous. And if he can grow hair there, why doesn’t he? ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3516 "2021-02-21T16:04:59Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > If he can’t grow hair there, he should remove the rest of his beard… Nah. He should just remove his chin. And donate it to Mitch who desperately needs one. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3517 "2021-02-21T16:06:37Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > > [@Morgyn](#): > > > > If he can’t grow hair there, he should remove the rest of his beard… > > Nah. He should just remove his chin. And donate it to Mitch who desperately needs one. - Mitch has a chin. It’s just hidden under all the flaps of loose skin. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3518 "2021-02-21T16:22:53Z")
> [@mikecurtis](#): > > Our guy has bigger campaign rallies!” > “Our guy has more twitface followers!” > “Our guy has more online posts about his accomplishments!” > “That proves our guy is better!” > It’s all just so…juvenile. Like we’re stuck in 7th grade discussing who should be prom king. You left out, “That proves our guy won!” which is infinitely more annoying. ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3519 "2021-02-21T16:51:48Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > > [@Railer13](#): > > > > The worst thing my right-wing FB friends are posting about Biden is that there are very few posts from the lefties touting his accomplishments in his first month. > > Do they not read the Dope? Do anybody’s right-wing FB friends read the Dope? ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3520 "2021-02-21T16:55:30Z")
> [@mikecurtis](#): > > “Our guy has bigger campaign rallies!” > “Our guy has more twitface followers!” > “Our guy has more online posts about his accomplishments!” > “That proves our guy is better!” > It’s all just so…juvenile. Like we’re stuck in 7th grade discussing who should be prom king. Now that you mention it, if we had only made the America-hating fuckstick American Prom King For Life back in 2015, maybe we could have avoided all this shit. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3521 "2021-02-21T17:24:43Z")
Or if they had just suspended his Twitter account back then. Just imagine all the pain, loss, stress and death that could have been avoided if Twitter had just taken the megaphone away in 2015. ---
**Author:** ![MrAtoz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@MrAtoz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrAtoz)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3522 "2021-02-21T19:38:29Z")
I suppose you may be referring to just actual elected Republicans and genuine media, rather than random right-wing folks. But if you count the latter, I’ve seen lots of attacks on Biden himself. Either that he’s a pedophile, or that he’s a Chinese agent, or both. Just today I saw a picture on Facebook of the White House, with a pagoda photoshopped onto the roof, with the text “A View of the Future.” ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3523 "2021-02-21T20:00:13Z")
The obvious solution: muttonchops. I will be opening my eye-bleach concession shortly. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3524 "2021-02-21T21:28:32Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > I will be opening my eye-bleach concession shortly.- You’ll clean up. _Ba-da-BING!_ ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3525 "2021-02-21T21:35:59Z")
[https://thehill.com/homenews/politics-101/539779-almost-half-of-republicans-would-join-trump-party-poll](https://thehill.com/homenews/politics-101/539779-almost-half-of-republicans-would-join-trump-party-poll) > Nearly half of Republicans say they would abandon the party as it is currently structured and join a new party if former [President Trump](https://thehill.com/people/donald-trump) was its leader, according to a new poll released Sunday. > > A Suffolk University-USA Today poll [found that](https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2021/02/21/exclusive-trump-party-he-still-holds-loyalty-gop-voters/6765406002/) 46 percent of Republicans said they would abandon the GOP and join the Trump party if the former president decided to create one. Only 27 percent said they would stay with the GOP, with the remainder indicating they would be undecided. > > "We feel like Republicans don’t fight enough for us, and **we all see Donald Trump fighting for us as hard as he can, every single day,"** a Republican and small-business owner from Milwaukee told the newspaper. “But then you have **establishment Republicans who just agree with establishment Democrats and everything** , and they don’t ever push back.” > … My bold. Okay. Someone explain to me. First bolded part: WHAT exactly are these people seeing that to them constitutes trump “fighting for us as hard as he can every single day”?? Second bolded part: Are they talking about the “establishment Republicans” who **BLOCK** just about everything the Democrats try to do?? Mitch McConnell agreeing with Democrats? He’s about as _establishment_ as they come. ---
**Author:** ![TheGunIsMightierThanThePen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thegunismightierthanthepen/32/2981_2.png) [@TheGunIsMightierThanThePen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheGunIsMightierThanThePen)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3526 "2021-02-21T21:52:19Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > First bolded part: WHAT exactly are these people seeing that to them constitutes trump “fighting for us as hard as he can every single day”?? I would presume the incessant stream of Twitter diarrhea, before his account got banned. > [@ThelmaLou](#): > > Second bolded part: Are they talking about the “establishment Republicans” who **BLOCK** just about everything the Democrats try to do?? Mitch McConnell agreeing with Democrats? He’s about as _establishment_ as they come. To them, any “establishment Republican” not fully in the Trump cult is a traitor to the party. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2021, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3527 "2021-02-21T22:03:31Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > First bolded part: WHAT exactly are these people seeing that to them constitutes trump “fighting for us as hard as he can every single day”?? They’re seeing him being as much of a liberal-exasperating outrageous asshole as he can be every single day. That’s what passes for “fighting for them” in the degraded state of conservative ideology these days. American conservatives as a movement have basically given up on having any constructive goals. As [I said a few months ago](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whence-the-urge-to-be-transgressive/925907/46), they’re immensely frustrated that so many of the goals their leaders exhorted them to champion over the last few decades just ended up falling apart or not achieving anything for them: > [@Kimstu](#): > > They’re sick of being wrong, and the cognitive dissonance is stressing them out so much that they’ve just gone into full-blown “break it all up and burn it all down” tantrum state. > > They were wrong about racial integration and black civil rights destroying American society […] They were wrong about women needing to stay in the home […] They were wrong about a “moral majority” of conservative Christians launching a lasting religious revival that would “take the country back for Christ” […] They were wrong in their vision of the US as a permanent majority-white country […] They were wrong about Saddam Hussein having WMD […] They were wrong about market-fundamentalist economic policies conducing to general economic stability and prosperity […] They were wrong about anthropogenic climate change being a hoax […] They were wrong about gay people being sick or abnormal or evil […] They were wrong about the belief that resisting “European-style socialized medicine” would result in their having reliable, affordable, effective health care […] They were wrong about identifying their own interests with those of wealthy individuals or corporations who had zero sense of loyalty to them in return […] They were wrong about labor unions being just unnecessary parasites whose absence wouldn’t make any difference to the availability of decent jobs or the protection of workers’ rights […] They were wrong about creationism or “intelligent design” or whatever being scientifically valid alternatives to evolutionary theory […] They were wrong about COVID-19 being a hoax, or no worse than the flu, or a Chinese or Democratic plot, or a momentary problem that would just “vanish” soon […] > > And most importantly, they were wrong in believing that the conservative politicians they ardently supported actually gave a shit about the well-being of any Americans if it would interfere with the increasing enrichment of the rich. More recently, they have added to those frustrations being wrong about the 2020 election being “stolen” from Trump, and about the January 6 insurrection being a patriotic act that would restore Trump to power, and about anti-government free-market individualism (as exemplified in Texas energy grid policies) not needing an adequate regulatory framework. American conservatives over the last half-century or so haven’t been able to achieve or create anything significant (largely because they’ve been following politicians who had no meaningful governmental goals other than to expedite consolidation of wealth and power among their elite cronies). In fact, most of the significant achievements of that period, such as expansion of rights, social benefits, etc., have been things that conservatives started out strongly opposed to, even if they ended up accepting them more or less grudgingly. The only thing they feel confident of being able to accomplish is being reactionary obstructionist assholes who piss off liberals. And Trump has been constantly presenting himself as a master of reactionary obstructionist liberal-pissing-off assholery, so that’s what they see as his “fighting for them”. Of course, Trump despises them as “low-class” and “losers” and only plays up to their adulation for the money and popularity, but they don’t realize that. ---
**Author:** ![Sherrerd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sherrerd/32/8_2.png) [@Sherrerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sherrerd)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2021, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3528 "2021-02-22T00:24:05Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > …American conservatives over the last half-century or so haven’t been able to achieve or create anything significant (largely because they’ve been following politicians who had no meaningful governmental goals other than to expedite consolidation of wealth and power among their elite cronies). In fact, most of the significant achievements of that period, such as expansion of rights, social benefits, etc., have been things that conservatives started out strongly opposed to, even if they ended up accepting them more or less grudgingly. > > The only thing they feel confident of being able to accomplish is being reactionary obstructionist assholes who piss off liberals. And Trump has been constantly presenting himself as a master of reactionary obstructionist liberal-pissing-off assholery, so that’s what they see as his “fighting for them”. … Yes, the entire phenomenon of “American conservatism” is a fundamentally corrupt enterprise. It was formulated as a shell game and it’s continued to be nothing at all but a shell game. _Protect established wealth and power by convincing the rubes of the ridiculous premise that their own interests are served by protecting established wealth and power_…that’s all that conservatism has ever been. The sum total of ‘conservative’ positions amount to nothing more than distractions for those rubes. Support for the Troops, Support for Law Enforcement, Respect for the Nuclear Family, Opposition to Unions, “Law and Order” (i.e. keep the dark-skinned in line)—not one of these has any actual adherents among those conning the marks. They are all expendable if conditions require them to be expendable. They are all lip-service distractions, serving the purpose of keeping the marks from seeing the actual game: keeping the wealthy wealthy, and the powerful powerful. When an enterprise is founded on a lie, it ultimately fails. This is the problem that ‘conservatism’ cannot solve. All it can do is double down on the distractions as a tactic for convincing the rubes that their problem is _democracy_—that all would be Wonderful if only we had a Wise Leader at the helm for life. ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2021, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140/3529 "2021-02-22T01:04:03Z")
> [@DesertDog](#): > > > [@mikecurtis](#): > > > > Our guy has bigger campaign rallies!” > > > > > “Our guy has more twitface followers!” > > > “Our guy has more online posts about his accomplishments!” > > > “That proves our guy is better!” > > > It’s all just so…juvenile. Like we’re stuck in 7th grade discussing who should be prom king. > > You left out, “That proves our guy won!” which is infinitely more annoying. A “friend” on Facebook posted, as proof the Biden couldn’t have been legally elected, that not only did he have far fewer Twitter followers than people who supposedly voted for him, but that Trump had more Twitter followers that people who supposedly voted for him. Apparently you are required to follow someone on Twitter in order to vote for them, and vice versa. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140.md?page=175) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-1/911140.md?page=177)