# NEW Stupid Republican Idea of the Day (Part 4) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 22, 2025, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678 "2025-02-22T21:08:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 17
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 11:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/321 "2025-03-19T11:57:07Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > Also, I don’t want chickens that shoot optic beams like Cyclops. > > Who’s going to gather eggs from **them**?! I think if you had a flock of laser-beam-eyed chickens in a short while you wouldn’t have a well-protected flock, but rather a pile of partially dismembered, somewhat cooked chicken parts. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/322 "2025-03-19T14:13:06Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > I think if you had a flock of laser-beam-eyed chickens in a short while you wouldn’t have a well-protected flock, but rather a pile of partially dismembered, somewhat cooked chicken parts. Or you spend a fortune on little red sunglasses. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/323 "2025-03-19T14:43:39Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > Or you spend a fortune on little red sunglasses. Yeah, but if the chicken’s laser-beam eyes are thwarted by wearing the glasses, what’s the point of them having laser beam eyes in the first place? I think that chickens would be too dumb to raise them if they had to, no matter what raising mechanism you design. ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/324 "2025-03-19T15:41:51Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > > [@Atamasama](#): > > > > Also, I don’t want chickens that shoot optic beams like Cyclops. > > > > Who’s going to gather eggs from **them**?! > > I think if you had a flock of laser-beam-eyed chickens in a short while you wouldn’t have a well-protected flock, but rather a pile of partially dismembered, somewhat cooked chicken parts. Isn’t that the new slogan for KFC? ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/325 "2025-03-19T16:41:44Z")
If the chickens ( or Cyclops) can’t control the frikken laser beams coming out their eyes, and they need red glasses, where does the energy go that is always coming out? Must get hot under those goggles. ---
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/326 "2025-03-19T17:06:55Z")
Umm, y’all are aware that red chicken eye coverings were a thing? [![](https://www.nationalband.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/chicken-glasses.png) ](https://www.nationalband.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/chicken-glasses.png) [![](https://www.nationalband.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/chicken-glasses-2.png) ](https://www.nationalband.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/chicken-glasses-2.png) > **[Chickens Can Put Their Shades On Too – National Band and Tag Company](https://www.nationalband.com/chickens-can-put-their-shades-on-too/)** ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/327 "2025-03-19T17:59:17Z")
Getting them to sit and read the eye charts so the prescription would be correct must have been a trip. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/328 "2025-03-19T18:01:01Z")
> [@crowmanyclouds](#): > > Umm, y’all are aware that red chicken eye coverings were a thing? Oh shit, maybe all of this has already happened and it’s just not well-known. ---
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/329 "2025-03-19T18:15:44Z")
Y’all had your choice of timelines, the one where chickens naturally have _Cyclops_ powers and the one where RFK artificially breeds chicken through multiple epidemics so they have _Cyclops_ powers. ---
**Author:** ![commasense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/commasense/32/3017_2.png) [@commasense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/commasense)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/330 "2025-03-19T20:08:58Z")
I’m just here to beat @Stranger_On_A_Train to the punch in pointing out that RED sunglasses wouldn’t filter out RED laser beams. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/331 "2025-03-19T20:13:45Z")
They’re powerful enough they shoot green lasers. ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/332 "2025-03-19T20:16:58Z")
> [@Exapno\_Mapcase](#): > > Getting them to sit and read the eye charts so the prescription would be correct must have been a trip. You think _that’s_ bad? Try playing chess with one. Although, they’re generally better opponents than pigeons are. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2025, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/333 "2025-03-19T20:31:11Z")
> [@commasense](#): > > I’m just here to beat @Stranger_On_A_Train to the punch in pointing out that RED sunglasses wouldn’t filter out RED laser beams. Technically they aren’t lasers, it’s a heatless concussive force that just has the appearance of red light. And they’re blocked by “ruby-quartz”, one of those fictional comic book materials that have unique physical properties that try to explain whatever implausible shit the writer came up with. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2025, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/334 "2025-03-20T01:22:50Z")
The Sevretary of Commerce is now acting like a crypto bro grifter trying to convince the marks to “buy the dip” so he can cash out and leave them holding the bag. [![](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4llrhdclvdlmmynkwsmg5tdc/bafkreidq63aivk3vuq6ahhh2rcmb5fg2osj3ncnfnrirjxa3fxrbxdu27e@jpeg) ](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4llrhdclvdlmmynkwsmg5tdc/bafkreidq63aivk3vuq6ahhh2rcmb5fg2osj3ncnfnrirjxa3fxrbxdu27e@jpeg) ---
**Author:** ![commasense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/commasense/32/3017_2.png) [@commasense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/commasense)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2025, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/335 "2025-03-20T02:39:33Z")
News flash: Fox News publishes a true statement!!! “Democrats want to destroy Musk.” ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2025, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/336 "2025-03-20T03:07:49Z")
[It looks like republican presidential candidates aren’t the only republican losers turning to violence.](https://www.aol.com/news/failed-candidate-found-guilty-shooting-020732646.html) > [@](#): > > A failed Republican candidate was found guilty Wednesday of hiring people to shoot at the homes of local Democratic leaders after he lost an election for the New Mexico House of Representatives, according to his attorney. > > Solomon Peña, 41, was charged with multiple felonies, including three counts of solicitation to commit a crime of violence, three counts of using and carrying a firearm during and in relation to a crime of violence and discharging the firearm, being a felon in possession of a firearm and conspiracy, according to a [federal superseding indictment](https://www.justice.gov/usao-nm/media/1345566/dl?inline) filed against him in U.S. District Court in Albuquerque, New Mexico. > > A jury found him guilty on all counts Wednesday evening, according to Peña’s lead attorney, Nicholas T. Hart. > > Peña faces life in prison. A sentencing date has not been set. Interesting. And he was already a convicted felon before this stable genius move. ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_Godot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/buck_godot/32/6573_2.png) [@Buck\_Godot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_Godot)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2025, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/337 "2025-03-20T03:54:20Z")
> [@SunUp](#): > > Plus, we would at the same time be breeding new - and shorter, i.e. faster - generations of flu virus that can evade the immune systems of those superchickens. Rinse and repeat. Or perhaps evolve to quit the chickens altogether and go after another species that spends a lot of time around chickens. ---
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2025, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/338 "2025-03-20T12:44:11Z")
> [@SunUp](#): > > we would at the same time be breeding new - and shorter, i.e. faster - generations of flu virus I’ll need a cite that short viruses are faster than tall ones, it seems like human sprinters tend to be taller than average. Although I imagine shorter/faster ones would find it easier to evade antibodies and T-cells, so you may be on to something. ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2025, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/339 "2025-03-20T12:56:54Z")
An important piece of _this_ one that all should be aware of: > **[Trump's US Commerce Secretary, who owns Tesla stocks, publicly recommends to...](https://electrek.co/2025/03/19/trump-us-commerce-secretary-owns-tesla-recommends-buy-tsla-stocks/)** > > Trump’s US Commerce Secretary, Howard Lutnick, who indirectly owns Tesla (TSLA) stocks through his firm, has publicly recommended buying Tesla... He’s not just currying favor with Musk, here. > [@](#): > > After being nominated by Trump, Lutnick said that he would be divesting from his holdings, which are mainly linked to Cantor Fitzgerald, within 90 days. > > The 90 days are not up yet, but there is no update on whether he has started divesting yet. [![](https://electrek.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2025/03/Screenshot-2025-03-19-at-10.20.40%E2%80%AFPM.jpg?quality=82&strip=all&w=1024) ](https://electrek.co/wp-content/uploads/sites/3/2025/03/Screenshot-2025-03-19-at-10.20.40%E2%80%AFPM.jpg?quality=82&strip=all&w=1024) [but maybe this is what you were getting at, **Smapti**] ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2025, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678/340 "2025-03-20T15:43:12Z")
> [@Folacin](#): > > I’ll need a cite that short viruses are faster than tall ones, it seems like human sprinters tend to be taller than average. I always thought it was creepy how much the flu virus looks like a naval mine. [![](https://answers.childrenshospital.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/05/AdobeStock_73714707.jpeg) ](https://answers.childrenshospital.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/05/AdobeStock_73714707.jpeg) [![](https://preview.redd.it/vihujfrkokb41.jpg?width=640&crop=smart&auto=webp&s=429eff4bda1de57221ee3526e489b62981ba3bc4) ](https://preview.redd.it/vihujfrkokb41.jpg?width=640&crop=smart&auto=webp&s=429eff4bda1de57221ee3526e489b62981ba3bc4) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678.md?page=16) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day-part-4/1014678.md?page=18)