NEW Stupid Republican Idea of the Day

“Equal justice under the law”.

The CIA is running an ad looking for diverse employees. Republicans, in particular Ted Cruz, are outrage. Cruz said, "If you’re a Chinese communist, or an Iranian Mullah, or Kim Jong Un…would this scare you?

We’ve come a long way from Jason Bourne."

Tennessee state legislator claims that the 3/5 compromise was designed to end slavery. After he finished speaking the other Republicans in the legislature gave him a standing ovation.

Kevin McCarthy rents a room from a lobbyist.

I never kept up with the Bourne franchise, but isn’t Jason Bourne the CIA assassin who went rogue and spent the next decade or so in a bloody vendetta with various subspecies of other CIA assassins to thwart their nefarious plots?

Is Ted Cruz under the impression that that’s how the CIA leadership actually wants their agency to operate? In fact, does he believe that Jason Bourne is in any way representative of the norm of CIA agents? Has he spent all those years in Washington without realizing that the typical CIA agent is a data analyst sitting at a computer, who probably doesn’t know one end of a gun from the other?

“Ted Cruz” and “realizing” almost never need to be in the same sentence.

I think Rafael only cares that Jason Bourne is a straight white male.

Also, has he forgotten that Kim Jong Un was exchanging love letters with his buddy Trump? Cruz is such a Jackass. I really don’t understand his wife being ok with him sucking the ass of Trump.

Ugh

She shares his (urk) values.

I know, but damn! I mean Trump called her ugly, with side by side pictures, on twitter! That’s gotta be hard to swallow!

Well, yeah, but as long as the guy doesn’t bring Kev cocoa in bed, read him a story, and tuck him in with his teddy every night, what’s the big deal? :face_with_raised_eyebrow:

Reaction has been swift:

Does he perhaps not understand that Jason Bourne is a fictional character?

A generation ago Dan Quayle embarrassed himself by criticizing Murphy Brown, but now Pubs seem just fine with holding up fictional characters as real-life role models. Or something.

They have lost touch with reality. And reality has lost touch with them.

At least Murphy Brown was styled as a real human being, with real human problems and real human solutions. Bourne is barely recognizable as a human, not only does Cruz reference the character, he wants our government agencies to operate as though they’re staffed with mind controlled killing machines.

She’s married to Ted Cruz, so I imagine she can put up with a lot.

This goes to show how completely performative the Republican idea of governance has become.

Apparently the primary purpose of the intelligence agencies is no longer gathering information or assessing threats. It’s pure intimidation, our adversaries are supposed to stop their bad acts because they’re intimidated by the idea of a “bad-ass” secret agent coming after them.
Even if we have no idea what those bad acts are, because the agencies don’t do real work anymore.
But if our enemies succeed in pulling off those bad acts, the Republicans will just blame the Democrats, so it’s a win-win for them

Lost touch my ass. Reality has moved on and left no forwarding address.

I know what wouldn’t be scary to potential enemies of the US: a spy agency made up entirely of straight white Christian men trying to be inconspicuous in places that aren’t. :roll_eyes:

If your purpose in hiring for the CIA is to scare your enemies, you want “rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists.”