# New Year’s Rant Solutions (January mini-rants)

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-year-s-rant-solutions-january-mini-rants/995437>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [January 1, 2024, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-year-s-rant-solutions-january-mini-rants/995437 "2024-01-01T06:00:57Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 1\
**Showing post:** 414

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**Author:** ![Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mundane_super_hero/32/6304_2.png) [@Mundane\_Super\_Hero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mundane_Super_Hero)\
**Post date:** [January 21, 2024, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-year-s-rant-solutions-january-mini-rants/995437/414 "2024-01-21T18:38:01Z")

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I feel a little guilty. Evidently, I kicked someone when they were down; not just short… down.

I posted a pretty brutal beat-up about Hallmark Christmas Movies in December (maybe November) and it kicked one of the “Christmas Queens” below the belt.

Who could forget this quote?

> [@Ho Fucking Ho - December Mini-Rants](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ho-fucking-ho-december-mini-rants/993961/81):
>
> “It’s a Pregnant Cat that Needs a Man Christmas!”  
> “My Clock is Ticking Fa-La-La… La-La… La-La-La-La”  
> “I’m a Princess! Gimmee Mah Prince!”  
> “Where’s My Serviceman? I Can’t Swim Out to Troop Ships in Pumps”  
> “Where’s My Farmer? I Wanna Pony…!”  
> “Hidey-Ho, Cowboy! There’s Poutine In Mah Boot!”  
> “If I Have Smokey Eye, Where’s Mah Fireman…?”  
> “Desperate D-Band Diva Seeks Ken Doll”  
> “I’m Moving Back to my Hometown. Who Can I Bang?”  
> “I’m a Baker and Chocolatier, But I Only Like Thin Guys”  
> “I Married All The Leading Men; Time To Do Commercials Yet?”  
> “I Have So Much Christmas Spirit Ima Openin’ a Winery”  
> “I Have So Much Christmas Spirit that If Y’all Light A Match, This Whole Town Will Go Up Like a Cogeneration Plant!”  
> “If I Blink 50 Times A Minute, Will You Marry Me?”  
> "It’s a \< Insert Rich City Name \> Christmas ( notice that they never say Detroit )
> 
> What will they think of for 2024?
> 
> “Ho-Ho-Ho… Ho-Ho-Ho… A Cringe-gal All The Way”…?

Well, I’ve noticed that they don’t show her movies anymore on Hallmark. Knowing Hallmark as the skin-flint outfit that it is, she probably got a swift kick from a Timberland boot as a pension.

Last week, while changing the channels, I saw her hawking fashion styles on QVC. It’s honest work, but she deserves better. Now, last night on SNL they had other original ‘Mean Girls’ on the show doing cameos… but not her. Today, while reading some of the shows reviews, I heard that she is the only ‘Mean Girl’ who was left out of the movie.

( How very ‘Mean Girl’ of that scumbag, Tina Fey. Somebody ought to nail her on a NYC street with an egg.)

For my part… I’m sorry, Lacey.

If you put your brand on boxed chocolate for Valentines Day, maybe you can laugh at Fey all the way to the bank? Best Wishes…

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