# Newbie (hi) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 11, 2004, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888 "2004-06-11T22:04:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2004, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/21 "2004-06-11T23:13:25Z")
> [@Blonde Keira](#): > > ok well im basically wondering why your being such an asshole about this, … Quick tip for ya: The Pit is the place for that sort of thing. Just relax:) ---
**Author:** ![MrFantsyPants](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ba0ec/32.png) [@MrFantsyPants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrFantsyPants)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2004, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/22 "2004-06-11T23:14:54Z")
Welcome Keira. Enjoy your new career as Crusader against Ignorance. Hope you stick around. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2004, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/23 "2004-06-11T23:15:38Z")
**Blonde Keira** : A word of advice. Calling people an asshole is not a good way to make a good impression. People here are somewhat tolerant of “newbies”, but there are limits. Making a few mistakes comes with the territory. Stay around long enough, and you’ll pick up on the style. But name-calling is generally not acceptable except in The Pit. Anyway, it’s best not to take things too personally around here. Personally, I’d love to get more “newbies” in here. I’d hate for this to turn into an exclusive club! Okay (and I promise I’m not being an asshole), since you brought it up: > [@](#): > > MY HOBBIES INCLUDE > Cheerleading, sunbathing, shopping, beach volleyball Cheerleaders creep me out. The way they shuffle their pom-poms and display their death-rictus-like smiles is just… creepy. > [@](#): > > WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU HAD 1 MILLION DOLLARS? > Buy all the clothes in the mall Geez, that’s a lot of clothes! I’d buy a helicopter. > [@](#): > > NAME SOME QUALITIES YOU LOOK FOR IN THE OPPOSITE SEX > sense of humor, someone who really loves me Humour, I’ve got. Love? I doubt I’ll ever let that happen again. > [@](#): > > WHAT ARE YOUR FUTURE GOALS? > law school then hopefully a lawyer As good a goal as any. What kind of lawyer? > [@](#): > > FAVOURITE QUOTE > Dont do anything i wldnt do 😉 I prefer other quotes. > [@](#): > > FINAL WORDS > please rate me! You seem enthusiastic. Be nice to people, and they will be nice to you. ---
**Author:** ![Blonde\_Keira](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8edcca/32.png) [@Blonde\_Keira](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blonde_Keira)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2004, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/24 "2004-06-11T23:17:20Z")
Its ok but 1. I wasnt dropping my clothes, thats the only pic i have right now. 2. I wasnt fishing for compliments at all, i was just putting my profile up, considering that i cant see anyone else’s profile. 3. Ive had a really bad day too and i cant stand it when people are sarcastic (lowest form of wit and all that stuff) I mean, dont get me wrong i use sarcasm alot but i hate it when i hear it on a bad day Anyways whatever in the end its your own opinion on what i was doing 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Blonde\_Keira](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8edcca/32.png) [@Blonde\_Keira](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blonde_Keira)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2004, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/25 "2004-06-11T23:21:43Z")
You seem enthusiastic. Be nice to people, and they will be nice to you. [/QUOTE] ok im not a normal cheerleader, thats stuck up and doesnt care about other people. I hope to one day become a lawyer of some sort, not sure exactly what yet. And i was being nice i just hate it when people think im deliberately doing stuff when im not. I dont wanna make enemies on here, in fact the total opposite 😃 so, sorry if i offended anyone by swearing but it really \*\*\*\*\*\*(censored) me off when people do stuff like that ---
**Author:** ![sofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/35a633/32.png) [@sofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sofia)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2004, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/26 "2004-06-11T23:21:52Z")
well…as another guest, i offer greetings…i can’t welcome you…not yet, anyway. hope you have a better day tomorrow. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2004, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/27 "2004-06-11T23:48:07Z")
Welcome to the SDMB, **Blonde Keira**. 🙂 I like the fact that you offered your profile even though you are a guest, and I do not hold it against you that we were forced to see you in a skimpy and _very_ alluring two piece. In fact, I was thinking of posting a new profile showing _me_ in a skimpy two piece. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2004, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/28 "2004-06-11T23:53:35Z")
Hey, so **Keira** (I hope it’s okay to call you that; we have no other **Keira** s here, so there need be no distinction;)), how’d you find out little corner of the internet? ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/29 "2004-06-12T00:15:52Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > In fact, I was thinking of posting a new profile showing _me_ in a skimpy two piece. 😃 AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! I’m Bliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiind!!! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/30 "2004-06-12T00:20:09Z")
Maybe we could forgo the subscription cost for anybody posing in a bikini?? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Shaolinrabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Shaolinrabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shaolinrabbit)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/31 "2004-06-12T00:26:20Z")
> [@GorillaMan](#): > > Maybe we could forgo the subscription cost for anybody posing in a bikini?? 😛 Ah, if only this were a democracy. Although let us not forget **Czarcasm** ’s example and remember that that may have consequences we are unwilling to bear. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Kaotic\_Newtral](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/71e660/32.png) [@Kaotic\_Newtral](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaotic_Newtral)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/32 "2004-06-12T01:47:37Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Welcome to the SDMB, **Blonde Keira**. 🙂 > I like the fact that you offered your profile even though you are a guest, and I do not hold it against you that we were forced to see you in a skimpy and _very_ alluring two piece. In fact, I was thinking of posting a new profile showing _me_ in a skimpy two piece. 😃 Can I get my money back? Just kidding\*(sorta)\*, **Czar** 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/33 "2004-06-12T04:40:48Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Welcome to the SDMB, **Blonde Keira**. 🙂 > In fact, I was thinking of posting a new profile showing _me_ in a skimpy two piece. 😃 After seeing this little hottie, I too was thinking of putting up a pic of me in a sexy 2-piece. Sadly, however, it would take 4 or 5 pieces just to cover my ass. Anyway, **Keira** as the self-appointed Official Welcomer around here, I’d just like to offer a friendly peni— er, hand and say you have great knockers. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/34 "2004-06-12T07:21:34Z")
Alright, lads: the high school girls are coming, and they look good in bikinis. Wear tight pants and think about baseball because they aren’t legal yet. **Kiera** , welcome to the Boards. As the official SDMB ladykiller I’d like to invite you to my apartm… er… the Straight Dope Message Boards. Here’s a quick tour: See smart people answer lots of silly questions in **General Questions.**! See smart people argue endlessly with other smart people in **Great Debates** (with occasional pauses to agree that yes, weed should be legal)! See nerdy-and-proud people share their Winger/Star Trek/Buffy the Vampire Slayer obsessions with other equally obsessed people, and one guy who wants to know how to use Kazaa without getting sued, in **Cafe Society**! See adolescent boys ask if their penises are big enough in **In My Humble Opinion**! Occasionally, see almost-always-female-Dopers asking how to resolve their latest workplace crises! See really, really funny people (and me) have “conversations” about the most inane subjects possible in **MPSIMS**! (Think Seinfeld, minus ratings) See all the people I offended in this post calling me an asshat in **The BBQ Pit**! Disclaimer: adolescent boys’ penises may be smaller than claimed in **IMHO** Don’t go into **About This Message Board** or **Comments on Cecil’s Columns/Staff Reports**. Bad things happen there. ---
**Author:** ![Already\_in\_Use](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@Already\_in\_Use](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Already_in_Use)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 7:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/35 "2004-06-12T07:54:15Z")
Hi, **Keira**. I’m afraid you don’t realize the consequences of your posting in chatroom style. Your lawn will die. Longtime friends will leave you. Your buttocks will lose their natural bounciness and start sagging and resembling cottage cheese and… what was I just saying? Mmmm, bouncy buttocks. Anyway, if you want to avoid those horrible fates, I can help. I’m a friend of **Cecil** ’s… yeah, that’s right, a friend. Heh heh. And all it will take to get you on his good side is a few naked pics of your lovely self sent my way! Howsabout that, eh? Sound like a deal? ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/36 "2004-06-12T14:07:14Z")
> [@](#): > > As the official SDMB ladykiller… You condone homicide? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/37 "2004-06-12T14:11:49Z")
> [@Johnny L.A.](#): > > You condone homicide? 😕 Don’t sweat that guy. He’s an asshat. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/38 "2004-06-12T14:11:57Z")
> [@Shaolinrabbit](#): > > Ah, if only this were a democracy. Although let us not forget **Czarcasm** ’s example and remember that that may have consequences we are unwilling to bear. 😃 Yes, if the wrong people (such as me) bare, it would be hard to bear… **Blonde Keira** : Do you ever watch the show {i]Friends\*? If you do, then imagine **Shaolinrabbit** (and about half the Dopers, for that matter) asking “how _you_ doin’?” in the style of Joey Tribbiani. Clearer now? Hope you stick around! ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/39 "2004-06-12T16:19:00Z")
> [@Johnny L.A.](#): > > You condone homicide? 😕 Not condone, _commit_ 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2004, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888/40 "2004-06-12T16:29:06Z")
> [@Really Not All That Bright](#): > > Not condone, _commit_ 😉 :eek: I hereby retract my aforementioned “asshat” comment as I would very much enjoy not being dead. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/newbie-hi/249888.md?page=3)