# Next papal name. Place your Bets! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 11, 2013, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997 "2013-02-11T18:13:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![getitrite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47774/32.png) [@getitrite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/getitrite)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/81 "2013-02-13T06:08:17Z")
I vote for Pope Finis I ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/82 "2013-02-13T06:12:32Z")
**Happy Scrappy Hero Pope.** …you heard it here first. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/83 "2013-02-13T21:03:40Z")
Pope Calvin N. Hobbs ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/84 "2013-02-13T21:18:54Z")
Pope Ari? Too Jewish? ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/85 "2013-02-13T21:22:46Z")
> [@Infovore](#): > > Or we could use a new Hilarius. That’d be funny. Pope Hilarius Too. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/86 "2013-02-13T21:23:49Z")
> [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](#): > > **Happy Scrappy Hero Pope.** > …you heard it here first. 😃 And if the fates are kind we’ll hear it here last. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2013, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/87 "2013-02-13T21:36:27Z")
Seinfeld: “Bozo the Clown. I mean, does he really need “the Clown” in his title, as clown? Are we gonna confuse him with Bozo the District Attorney? Bozo the Pope? There’s no other Bozo” I think its time we had a Pope Bozo. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/88 "2013-02-14T00:40:51Z")
We’ll be told it’s “Sam the Pope” for its friendly appeal, but his real name will be Chandranath, since the jobs being outsourced to a call center in Bangalore. ---
**Author:** ![phxjcc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8491ac/32.png) [@phxjcc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phxjcc)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/89 "2013-02-14T00:45:15Z")
Pope Erazzi ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/90 "2013-02-14T04:13:07Z")
Pope Ignatius ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/91 "2013-02-14T04:42:40Z")
Pope Pope Bo-Bope Banana-fana Fo-fope Fee-fi-mo-mope Pope! ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/92 "2013-02-14T05:04:16Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > So everyone is sure they won’t follow that old document again and go with Petrus Romanus? And, thus, they don’t think he’ll be the last pope ever? Even setting aside the whole conspiracy theories, naming yourself Pope Peter would take some serious balls. I think most Catholics would consider it kind of sacrilege, even. Myron Pope 😉 Actually, considering that there’s going to be a new SW trilogy coming out, a Pope Lando II would be perfect! ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/93 "2013-02-14T05:24:40Z")
> [@Slithy\_Tove](#): > > We’ll be told it’s “Sam the Pope” for its friendly appeal, but his real name will be Chandranath, since the jobs being outsourced to a call center in Bangalore. Pope Chandragupta, now that’s a name I can get behind. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/94 "2013-02-14T12:19:21Z")
> [@AK84](#): > > Pope Chandragupta, now that’s a name I can get behind. Pope Koothrapali. It’s the perfect job for someone who doesn’t like talking to women. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/95 "2013-02-14T14:30:51Z")
Pope Judah now _that_ would be interesting ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/96 "2013-02-14T14:41:44Z")
Urban Meyer. ---
**Author:** ![LawMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@LawMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LawMonkey)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/97 "2013-02-14T14:49:42Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > Urban Meyer. _Oscar_ Meyer. I mean, the popemobile really isn’t all that charismatic in its current configuration… ---
**Author:** ![Enlightening\_Meditation](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecc23a/32.png) [@Enlightening\_Meditation](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enlightening_Meditation)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/98 "2013-02-14T15:03:35Z")
Pope Callixtus IV ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/99 "2013-02-14T15:30:16Z")
Interesting Pope Names We haven’t had for a While (with next number in parentheses) \*\*Marcellus (III) Callixtus (IV) Eugene (V) Celestine (VI) Honorius (V) Gelasius (III) Paschal (III) Damasas (III) Sergius (V) Agapetus (III) Marinus (III) Romanus (II) Formosus (II) Zachary (II) Sisinnius (II) Conon (II) Agatho (II) Donus (II) Adeodatus (III) Vitalian (II) Severinus (II) Sabinian (II) Vigilius (II) Silverius (II) Felix (V) Hormisdas (II) Symmachus (II) Simplicius (II) Zosimus (II) Siricius (II) Liberius (II) Marcellinus (II) Gaius (II) Eutychian (II) Dionysius (II) Cornelis (II) Fabian (II) Anterus (II) Pontian (II) Zepherinus (II) Eleuterus (II) Soter (II) Anicetus (II) Hyginus (II) Telesphorus (II) Evaristus (II) \*\* Of course, we can’t have another Pope Innocent. There have been too many of them, and nobody’s Innocent, these days. We also don’t need to go to double names, like John Paul. The first John Paul did it as a gesture to his two predecessors, and the second to honor the untimely-dying predecessor. But we don’t need to use those any more. Not when you look at all those pope najmes that have only been used once – 33 of them! Some would be bragging (“Soter” = “Savior”. “Formosus” = “beautiful”), and I wouldn’t suggest them. But we could have Pope Fabian II! How cool would that be? Or Pope Conon II the Barbarian! ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2013, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997/100 "2013-02-14T18:15:22Z")
Pope Gaius Zosimus Marcullus! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/next-papal-name-place-your-bets/649997.md?page=6)