# "NO.... ADRIAN!" The new Rocky movie **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 28, 2006, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439 "2006-06-28T02:56:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2006, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439/1 "2006-06-28T02:56:01Z")
I didn’t realize until recently that Stallone is broke, but he must be because that’s the only reason he’d be doing [Rocky Balboa](http://imdb.com/title/tt0479143/) and [Rambo IV](http://imdb.com/title/tt0462499/) back to back. Perhaps next year he’ll start work on _Stop or My Mom Will Shoot…Again!_ and _ANOTHER Party at Kitty & Stud’s_. Anyway, does anybody know the plot of this movie? I as wondering why Talia Shire is not on board, nor has the role of Adrian been given to another actress. A gossip rag says that Adrian is dead and Rocky, still penniless as in the last movie (how many plotholes had to lead to that?) returns to the ring ([Gump:]Uh-gain![/Gump]) to help out his son who’s deeply in debt. (Irony would have been if Rocky, Jr., played last time by Stallone’s real life son Sage, were played by Talia Shire’s real life son [Jason Schwarzman](http://imdb.com/name/nm0005403/)). Has any boxer ever fought at that age (Rocky would have to be pushing 60 just as Stallone is.) I’ll probably see this movie as a “complete the series” thing, but I’m guessing it’s gonna make _Rocky V_ look like _Godfather 2_. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2006, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439/2 "2006-06-28T02:58:30Z")
[Stallone is almost 60 years old!](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sylvester_Stallone) He’s not actually going to **fight** in this movie, is he?! :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![ululate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/59ef9b/32.png) [@ululate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ululate)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2006, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439/3 "2006-06-28T03:01:00Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > Anyway, does anybody know the plot of this movie? IIRC, Adrian is dead, Rocky is trying to move on by parlaying his celebrity into a successful restaurant – and some new computer simulation lets folks plug in the relevant stats to see how Mike Tyson would’ve done against Joe Louis, or how the current champ would’ve done against Rocky Balboa in his prime. The latter invites all the interest, as well as all the trash talk from the champ about how he roxxors and would’ve pwned Rocky hard, which is why the music eventually gets cued up and so on and so forth. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2006, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439/4 "2006-06-28T04:30:35Z")
He helps Bullwinkle escape from Boris and Natasha. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2006, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439/5 "2006-06-28T04:42:08Z")
> [@Thudlow Boink](#): > > He helps Bullwinkle escape from Boris and Natasha. Sounds like beeg troouble for Moose and Squirrel!\* I can club that squirrel three times a night, so I can! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2006, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439/6 "2006-06-28T04:43:30Z")
According to Wikipedia, Stallone is still getting 20 million per picture. Is that possible? Stallone is in great shape, and with the miracle of movie retouching and makeup could probably pass for someone in his late 40’s/early 50’s. George Foreman won the heavyweight title at age 45, and Larry Holmes almost did too. Archie Moore won the light heavyweight title at age 49. So, if we assume Rocky’s going to break the record, I think they could plausibly claim that he was, say, 53 or 55 or something and still win the title. It’d be a stretch, but not wholly impossible. ---
**Author:** ![Arnold\_Winkelried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2006, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439/7 "2006-06-28T04:59:19Z")
> [@ululate](#): > > Rocky is trying to move on by parlaying his celebrity into a successful restaurant Please please please tell me that the theme song to the movie will be _The Rye or the Kaiser_ by Weird Al Yankovic! (sing to the melody of “The Eye of The Tiger”). The lyrics include: > [@](#): > > Fat and weak, what a disgrace. > Guess the champ got too lazy. > … > But he’s no bum, he works down the street > He bought the neighborhood deli. > Back on his feet, now he’s choppin’ up meat. > Come inside, maybe you’ll hear him say, > > Try the rye or the kaiser, > They’re on special tonight. > If you want, you can have an appetizer > … > So today, his deli comes first > Still he dreams of his past days of glory > Goes in the back and beats up on the liverwurst > … ---
**Author:** ![hey\_alright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/90ced4/32.png) [@hey\_alright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hey_alright)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2006, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439/8 "2006-06-28T05:43:12Z")
Rocky VII: Adrian’s Revenge! ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2006, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439/9 "2006-06-28T06:06:38Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > Rocky, still penniless as in the last movie (how many plotholes had to lead to that?) Just one. But it was a big one. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2006, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439/10 "2006-06-28T14:47:44Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > [Stallone is almost 60 years old!](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sylvester_Stallone) He’s not actually going to **fight** in this movie, is he?! :rolleyes: [Yup,](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=340246) [ayup](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=339677), he is. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2006, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-adrian-the-new-rocky-movie/362439/11 "2006-06-28T15:03:30Z")
Interesting that he didn’t get his real-life kid to play his movie kid like he did in Rambo V. I wonder why that is?