# No intel job for me! (mild) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 9, 2005, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837 "2005-09-09T16:24:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837/1 "2005-09-09T16:24:57Z")
Bollox! I went to an information session at school yesterday for the Defense Intelligence Agency. They put on the little dog and pony show of how great the agency was, I knew better on a couple of points, but hey, I try and be realistic, every place has its problems, etc. Then they get to the eligibility requirements. No drugs in the last 18 months. Check. Not sleeping with any foreign nationals. Umm… Check. US citizen. Check. Not a dual citizen. … Crap! My newfound citizenship opens more career doors for me than it closes, so I can tell them “thanks anyway”, but its still frustrating that I sat through an hour of babbling about how great the DIA is. Oh well, such is life. Gar! ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837/2 "2005-09-09T16:37:08Z")
This forum is not secure. Call me back from a payphone in MPSIMS. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Scrivener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837/3 "2005-09-09T16:51:35Z")
FWIW, **CynicalGabe** , I doubt MI6 would want you either, since you misspelled “bollocks”. 😃 Have you considered working for FEMA? It seems they’ll accept _anyone_… ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837/4 "2005-09-09T17:21:12Z")
> [@The Scrivener](#): > > FWIW, **CynicalGabe** , I doubt MI6 would want you either, since you misspelled “bollocks”. 😃 > > Have you considered working for FEMA? It seems they’ll accept _anyone_… I could probably run the joint. And I can’t believe I misspelled bollocks. :smack: Forgive me, I just woke up. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2005, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837/5 "2005-09-09T21:41:31Z")
> [@CynicalGabe](#): > > Not a dual citizen. … Crap! What if you were to give up your second citizenship? ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837/6 "2005-09-10T00:04:54Z")
> [@Quartz](#): > > What if you were to give up your second citizenship? Having that opens more doors for me than it closes. ---
**Author:** ![fushj00mang](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d26b3c/32.png) [@fushj00mang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fushj00mang)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837/7 "2005-09-10T04:59:21Z")
Gabe, I’m guessing you’re either getting your BA/BS or are finishing graduate school. In either case, ever thought of working for the FBI instead of the DIA? I’m not sure of your qualifications, but since it’s the DIA I’m guessing its of a technical nature? The FBI’s always looking for good tech agents. (I would say go for the DoD and buck for officer, but I’m not sure if you’d want to be in the US Army. After all, the Royal Army is the dog’s bollocks! (Or so they say…)) ---
**Author:** ![zagloba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/977dab/32.png) [@zagloba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zagloba)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837/8 "2005-09-10T07:07:06Z")
Why not apply at AMD? You mean you don’t want to design microprocessors? ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837/9 "2005-09-11T02:37:38Z")
> [@zagloba](#): > > You mean you don’t want to design microprocessors? Can I steal plans for them from foreign governments instead? 🙂 Yes, FBI has occurred to me. My specialization is nonproliferation, and the FBI has some dealings there. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837/10 "2005-09-11T22:20:54Z")
**CynicalGabe** , Double Nought Spy! He’s worked for MI5, FBI, CIA, KFC… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-intel-job-for-me-mild/320837/11 "2005-09-11T22:31:24Z")
Who told you about my stint at KFC??? :mad: PS: This post will self-destruct in 5 seconds.