# NO, you can't do that! CAN'T!... CANNOT!...do you understand? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 24, 2003, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742 "2003-01-24T23:10:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2003, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/1 "2003-01-24T23:10:17Z")
No, you can’t send a fax from the fax machine at the moment because the bloody ‘stand alone email machine’ that you insisted on having, shares the same line and it is currently sending all your emails with unreasonably large attachments… NO!, you can’t take a copy of the stock and sales system home to work on it, NO… it’s not that I don’t want you to (although that may become the case shortly), it’s that it consists of an NT network running SQL server and serving an enormous database…NO! it won’t even fit on two floppy disks! NO, it isn’t possible to link up this office with the other one several miles away because, well, because for one thing, you won’t let me connect our network with the outside world and also there’s only one line going out of this building and \*\*AS I THINK I MAY ALREADY HAVE MENTIONED IT IS \*\ ***TIED UP FOR MOST OF THE DAY SENDING FAXES AND EMAILS!!!** No, you can’t…Oh why bother? [sub]I have had one of those weeks[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2003, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/2 "2003-01-24T23:21:18Z")
I’m sorry. I get it. I went out and bought another box of floppy disks. It was expensive ($5.99) but I read that many companies are spending that much on IT and I don’t want us to be left in the dust. I also put in a request for another phone line. You will have to share it with the receptionist but that should be more than enough right? ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2003, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/3 "2003-01-24T23:25:25Z")
I’m sorry, but I had to unplug the computer so I could nuke up my lunch. That was ok, wasn’t it??? ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2003, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/4 "2003-01-25T03:30:21Z")
Wow. That was some intensive coding. But the color gradient is cooooool! Can you do one for me with the Pride Rainbow colors? ---
**Author:** ![Siegfried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Siegfried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siegfried)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2003, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/5 "2003-01-25T03:46:00Z")
Reminds me of the CDW commercials with Fred the IT Guy. My favorite part is the guy sticking his head in the office and saying, “I’m off to crash the server. Wish me luck!” Anyway, sorry to hear about your week. Take the weekend off to unwind. And may next week be much better. ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2003, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/6 "2003-01-25T04:45:43Z")
Heheheh. Hey, Fred, there was no room left on the server, so I deleted all the files! ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2003, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/7 "2003-01-25T04:50:10Z")
Can somebody get all these idiot faxes and emails off the phone line? My lag time on networked MechWarrior4 is getting me cooked! ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2003, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/8 "2003-01-25T04:57:58Z")
My cupholder’s broken! ---
**Author:** ![Nanoda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Nanoda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nanoda)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2003, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/9 "2003-01-25T05:02:04Z")
I bought everybody inkjet printers 'cause they were so cheap at the store! Isn’t that great? ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Kumquat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gary\_Kumquat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Kumquat)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2003, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/10 "2003-01-25T06:00:36Z")
You run SQL server? This after your confession of shopping at PC World? I fear we’re going to need a chat. ---
**Author:** ![Blackclaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e68b1a/32.png) [@Blackclaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackclaw)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2003, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/11 "2003-01-25T14:48:25Z")
Look at the pretty colors my monitor makes when I run this magnet over the screen! ---
**Author:** ![Floater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/dc4da7/32.png) [@Floater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Floater)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2003, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/12 "2003-01-25T15:44:12Z")
Reminds me of when Dilbert’s boss asked him to download the internet on a diskette. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2003, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/13 "2003-01-27T00:17:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Homebrew \* > \*\*Wow. That was some intensive coding. But the color gradient is cooooool! > > Can you do one for me with the Pride Rainbow colors? \*\* What would you like the text to say? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2003, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/14 "2003-01-27T00:34:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Gary Kumquat \* > \*\*You run SQL server? > > This after your confession of shopping at PC World? > > I fear we’re going to need a chat. \*\* Also not my choice; the company I work for just bought out one of it’s clients; my job was to transplant their system on our network (whihc was fairly simple) - SQL server, though, is vastly superior to anything that I had previously been allowed to use… ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2003, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/15 "2003-01-27T04:49:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mangetout \* > \*\*What would you like the text to say? \*\* Homebrew, not just for breakfast! ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2003, 10:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/16 "2003-01-27T10:50:53Z")
**Homebrew, not just for breakfast!** I’ve made it bold because the colours show up better that way; you can modify the font style/size etc by wrapping the whole thing in tags of your choice. (Also…shouldn’t it be a semicolon instead of a comma?) ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2003, 11:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/17 "2003-01-27T11:05:17Z")
Were all these assinine requests from the same person? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2003, 11:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/18 "2003-01-27T11:11:25Z")
And then some. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2003, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/19 "2003-01-27T14:29:24Z")
Now that’s **wicked cool**! Thanks! ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2003, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742/20 "2003-01-27T14:51:50Z")
Although now I have to face the fact that God will cast me into a fiery pit for all eternity for _helping **Homebrew** to be gay_, or, rather, worse still; \*helping \*_Homebrew to do icky gay things_ - a sin so heinous and unspeakable that the Bible authors did not dare mention it. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-do-that-cant-cannot-do-you-understand/150742.md?page=2)