# No, you can't use my bathroom **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 7, 2005, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491 "2005-07-07T19:05:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![matt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@matt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/101 "2005-07-08T15:03:30Z")
Well, this has been an education for me! Up until about fifteen minutes ago, I was under the impression that most people have a pain-free option of delaying taking a dump for up to ~12 hours after the urge hits, as I do. To me, unless I’m staying overnight, taking a dump in someone else’s bathroom is as unnecessary as clipping my toenails in their living room. And so I’ve always regarded it in much the same light. Equipped with this misinformation, my sympathy was with the OP. Now I know better, but it is possible that **Sat on a Cookie** hasn’t fully taken in the implications of what she’s been told. ---
**Author:** ![EleventyOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecb155/32.png) [@EleventyOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EleventyOne)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/102 "2005-07-08T15:03:54Z")
Well, in case the OP ever deigns to read the entire thread, I too am still wondering how this guy managed to befoul her bathroom so badly it’s unusable after two days. The answer could go a long way toward redeeming her in this thread. Scenario one: The guy had a jet-powered sphincter and spattered poop all over all four walls and ceiling, finger-painted a picture of his penis on the mirror with it, and used her grandma’s antique linen napkins he found stored in the side cabinet to wipe his ass. Reaction: Well, in that case I’d pit the hell out of this guy too. And maybe call a HAZMAT squad. Scenario two: The guy did a stinky doody, flushed, and boy did the room smell for a half-hour. The OP doesn’t want to go back in there until all the potential germs die of old age. Reaction: Thread continues as it is. ---
**Author:** ![bordelond](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bordelond/32/150_2.png) [@bordelond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bordelond)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/103 "2005-07-08T15:26:15Z")
> [@matt](#): > > … I was under the impression that most people have a pain-free option of delaying taking a dump for up to ~12 hours after the urge hits, as I do. :eek: Holy … well, you know. Is that even halfway common? ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/104 "2005-07-08T15:29:20Z")
> [@bordelond](#): > > :eek: > > Holy … well, you know. > > Is that even halfway common? Hell, maybe back in the days when my asshole was young and shiny… ---
**Author:** ![Greathouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/greathouse/32/2992_2.png) [@Greathouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greathouse)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/105 "2005-07-08T15:29:23Z")
I’ve never heard of such a thing. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/106 "2005-07-08T15:29:41Z")
**EleventyOne** : Welcome to the boards. A wonderful sum-up, that was. ---
**Author:** ![xbuckeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9e8a1a/32.png) [@xbuckeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xbuckeye)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/107 "2005-07-08T15:35:42Z")
> [@matt](#): > > \To me, unless I’m staying overnight, taking a dump in someone else’s bathroom is as unnecessary as clipping my toenails in their living room. And so I’ve always regarded it in much the same light.\ OMG!! I had someone do this once!!! And they left the clippings in the carpet!!! But I didn’t rush off to the pit\*, because it was a girl that was staying with me as a favor to a friend of a friend thing and she was like 14 or something. I used my trusty rusty vacuum, clippings were gone, I got over it. I can’t imagine 2 days later being all "I can’t _possibly_ set foot in the living room because some skanky little girl cut her toenails in there and took like 15 minutes and probably masturbated while doing it! \*OK, so I hadn’t even met the Pit yet, but I wouldn’t have, had I known about the Pit, either ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/108 "2005-07-08T15:37:25Z")
> [@Stonebow](#): > > Seriously, when I have anyone working for me- contractor, repairman, etc. I … let them know where the facilities are. I also make a point of shaking their hand before and after the job is done. I just hope they washed their hands, first. ---
**Author:** ![matt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@matt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/109 "2005-07-08T15:46:54Z")
> [@bordelond](#): > > :eek: > > Holy … well, you know. > > Is that even halfway common? I have no idea, but I guess we’re going to find out. Like I said, I’ve been assuming it was the norm for the past 30-odd years… ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/110 "2005-07-08T15:48:25Z")
> [@matt](#): > > Up until about fifteen minutes ago, I was under the impression that most people have a pain-free option of delaying taking a dump for up to ~12 hours after the urge hits, as I do. Wow. That would be useful, like at work. But I can’t do that at all – when I gotta go, I gotta go fairly quickly. I can’t hang on for hours and hours. I’ve been in many a stinky bathroom. It sorta goes with the territory. That’s what the air freshener is for! ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/111 "2005-07-08T15:57:01Z")
> [@matt](#): > > I have no idea, but I guess we’re going to find out. Like I said, I’ve been assuming it was the norm for the past 30-odd years… I can, in dire straits, hang on for an hour or two. Sometimes. 12 hours? Uh-uh, no way. You must have the Sphincter of the Gods. ---
**Author:** ![FaerieBeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e95f7d/32.png) [@FaerieBeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FaerieBeth)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/112 "2005-07-08T16:08:36Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > I just hope they washed their hands, first. ::_Bar soap and liquid soap pump deployed to the guest bath_:: > [@This Year's Model](#): > > You’re forgetting the issue of Playboy. Hmm, this will be a problem. Thanks to the DVD player and the Internet, we have very little paper porn in the house. I did just get a Fredrick’s of Hollywood catalog in the mail, though, so perhaps that will do in a pinch. > [@Stonebow](#): > > And remembered to have her husband reschedule his lunch so that he could be home with her when the cable guy arrives- in the event that 70’s style porno music starts when he walks through the door, I’m burning the house down. So you’re saying I shouldn’t answer the door in my red nightie? Dammit. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/113 "2005-07-08T16:12:50Z")
One can only hope that **Sat On Cookie** only has that one bathroom and while sticking to her highly evolved pricipals, explodes in a matter of days. Of course, being that up tight, I bet she can last for months. ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/114 "2005-07-08T16:13:36Z")
> [@This Year's Model](#): > > You must have the Sphincter of the Gods. \*Band na… \* Never mind I used to be able to schedule my sphincter in high school, because there was no way I was going to crap in the bathroom there, in a door-less stall, amid the smokers. Since I grew up and discovered coffee, and inadequate sleep, my anus is all over the map when it comes to poop time. Usually in the morning, after two cups of coffee, but sometimes in the afternoon (and at 8pm last night - what was up with that?). However, if I have a Starbucks bottled Frappuccino, the 10 minute countdown starts immediately. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/115 "2005-07-08T16:16:21Z")
> [@matt](#): > > I have no idea, but I guess we’re going to find out. Like I said, I’ve been assuming it was the norm for the past 30-odd years… Once a day, between 4 and 4:30 am. Unless I’ve eaten something yukky, you can wind your watch by me. ---
**Author:** ![Dazzling\_White\_Diamonds](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/41988e/32.png) [@Dazzling\_White\_Diamonds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dazzling_White_Diamonds)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/116 "2005-07-08T16:17:39Z")
> [@FaerieBeth](#): > > I’m so glad I read this thread. The cable guy is coming to work on the modem today, so I’ve double checked the guest bath to make sure it’s stocked with toilet paper and a handy can of aerosol disinfectant in the top drawer. Precisely. That is EXACTLY what I do. ---
**Author:** ![Uvula\_Donor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e19adc/32.png) [@Uvula\_Donor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uvula_Donor)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/117 "2005-07-08T16:21:34Z")
> [@5que](#): > > . . . my anus is all over the map when it comes to poop time. . . Reason #42 why I love the SDMB: The verbal imagery. ---
**Author:** ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/118 "2005-07-08T16:34:02Z")
> [@Sat on Cookie](#): > > I don’t have time to read the whole thread; I just wanted ya’ll to know I’m not avoiding you on purpose. I will say that regardless of various less-than-complimentary sentiments, no one is going to change my mind. I’m satisfied I’m not a jerk and my complaint is warranted, so there ya go. > > As you were. I imagine her sitting at her computer with her fingers jammed into her ears, yelling “LA LA LA LA LA!” at the top of her voice. Honey, this _is_ avoiding us on purpose. If you feel like making statements but have no interest in the replies, do us a favor and just say them aloud to yourself in the privacy of your own home. A message board is not for someone who just wants to take a verbal dump. It’s about _discussion_. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/119 "2005-07-08T16:34:13Z")
> [@Sat on Cookie](#): > > Stop taking 15 minute dumps in my bathroom. It’s fucking disgusting. > > [snip] > > It’s been two days since you and your partner cleaned the carpets and I still can’t bring myself to use the bathroom you “occupied.” . Maybe you should have called Stanley Steemer instead of Cleveland Steamer. (Why didn’t I think of this pun earlier? :D) ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2005, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491/120 "2005-07-08T16:35:11Z")
> [@Uvula Donor](#): > > Reason #42 why I love the SDMB: The verbal imagery. You just entered a [world](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=80957) of [hurt](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=1800866&postcount=60). 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/no-you-cant-use-my-bathroom/311491.md?page=7)