# Nominate a profession for the Golgafrincham b ark **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 30, 2011, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612 "2011-08-30T12:14:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/21 "2011-08-31T06:18:08Z")
Reality TV stars. Don’t get me wrong, I hate Lady GaGa but I can understand why she’s famous. The Situation or whatever the hell? Yeah, send them away. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/22 "2011-08-31T06:24:25Z")
> [@JoelUpchurch](#): > > And who created the complicated laws? Do you think that you could run a large society at all well without complicated laws? A society that is too large and complicated for a single person to understand is going to require a complicated system of laws to run it. It was necessity that ultimately forced the creation of a complex system of laws. Eliminating lawyers wouldn’t make the laws much if any less complex; it just means that you’d have to try to deal with them without any help. ---
**Author:** ![Alka\_Seltzer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c89c15/32.png) [@Alka\_Seltzer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alka_Seltzer)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/23 "2011-08-31T09:38:15Z")
> [@mrklutz](#): > > “The first thing we do, let’s kill all the lawyers.” Isn’t that Shakespeare? Reluctantly, I have to concede ridding ourself of all the lawyers isn’t practical. Some good suggestions above. I’d like to add, anyone who skims money while contributing nothing to society, such as anyone involved with running a penny auction site, or “noise” traders. We could also ship off the career-unemployed (never worked, never intend to work) and prison population. Space, the giant Australia. ---
**Author:** ![willthekittensurvive](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/91b2a8/32.png) [@willthekittensurvive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/willthekittensurvive)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/24 "2011-08-31T10:39:23Z")
I would like to nominate female swimsuit and lingerie models, their existence does nothing but give normally built woman low self esteem. I would also nominate myself as captain on said spaceship. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_the\_Immortal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Max\_the\_Immortal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_the_Immortal)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 11:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/25 "2011-08-31T11:04:46Z")
> [@RandMcnally](#): > > Reality TV stars. Don’t get me wrong, I hate Lady GaGa but I can understand why she’s famous. The Situation or whatever the hell? Yeah, send them away. I nominate reality TV _producers_ and their ilk. Basically anyone who would rather make bland entertainment than try to make good art. ---
**Author:** ![kferr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/71e660/32.png) [@kferr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kferr)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/26 "2011-08-31T11:54:45Z")
> [@bump](#): > > What’s a chugger? Charity Mugger. The people you see in the high street or mall pestering everyone to contribute to whatever charity they’re pushing. Can I nominate SDMB moderators without getting banned? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 12:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/27 "2011-08-31T12:02:06Z")
> [@kferr](#): > > Charity Mugger. The people you see in the high street or mall pestering everyone to contribute to whatever charity they’re pushing. “Could I have a moment of your time?” “Certainly. \* [Beat]\* And I hope you enjoyed it. Good day.” ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/28 "2011-08-31T13:31:02Z")
> [@kferr](#): > > Charity Mugger. The people you see in the high street or mall pestering everyone to contribute to whatever charity they’re pushing. Hah.. now that I know what the word means, I know what you’re talking about. The second-to-last time I was in the UK, I was in London, walking down Tottenham Ct. road, and some chick started haranguing me to sign up for some petition for British whales or sloths or some shit, and I very politely said (in my normal Gulf Coast/SE Texas accent) “Well, ma’am, I’m not from here. I don’t think I’m eligible to sign up.”, meaning that I’m an American, and probably not an eligible petitioner to the Crown or whoever. She says without batting an eye “That’s ok- you don’t have to live in London.” Either she was deaf, stupid or not even paying enough attention to realize I’m not British in any way except far distant ancestry. ---
**Author:** ![Filbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/filbert/32/3433_2.png) [@Filbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Filbert)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/29 "2011-08-31T14:14:00Z")
> [@bump](#): > > Hah.. now that I know what the word means, I know what you’re talking about. > > The second-to-last time I was in the UK, I was in London, walking down Tottenham Ct. road, and some chick started haranguing me to sign up for some petition for British whales or sloths or some shit, and I very politely said (in my normal Gulf Coast/SE Texas accent) “Well, ma’am, I’m not from here. I don’t think I’m eligible to sign up.”, meaning that I’m an American, and probably not an eligible petitioner to the Crown or whoever. > > She says without batting an eye “That’s ok- you don’t have to live in London.” > > Either she was deaf, stupid or not even paying enough attention to realize I’m not British in any way except far distant ancestry. I don’t think that would matter, I’m pretty sure you don’t need to be British to sign up for that sort of petition. It’s just a mission to get a lot of names/money, no-one normally cares who they are, so long as they’re real people. I know I signed up on a similar thing in Australia when I was over on holiday. I’d like to nominate the vast majority of house rental agencies. I’m leaving a few in the hope that one of them, somewhere, actually is helpful… I can dream. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/30 "2011-08-31T15:04:00Z")
Here, depending on what the petition’s for, you may have to be a registered voter in the jurisdiction where the petition is being presented. Certain legislative petitions to get things on the ballot require this. This probably isn’t the case for something without any legal weight that supposedly reflects popular opinion. ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/31 "2011-08-31T16:08:13Z")
> [@Dragwyr](#): > > Not a profession, but a single person: Some no-talent socialite named Paris Hilton, who apparently thinks she is Og’s gift to the world. I want to upgrade that to the entire category of no-talent socialites who think they’re Og’s gift to the world, who are famous for no reason other than “they’re famous.” Kardashian sisters, I’m looking at YOU. ---
**Author:** ![JoelUpchurch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f05b48/32.png) [@JoelUpchurch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JoelUpchurch)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/32 "2011-08-31T16:39:35Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > Do you think that you could run a large society at all well without complicated laws? A society that is too large and complicated for a single person to understand is going to require a complicated system of laws to run it. It was necessity that ultimately forced the creation of a complex system of laws. Eliminating lawyers wouldn’t make the laws much if any less complex; it just means that you’d have to try to deal with them without any help. This is obviously wrong. The U.S. has one lawyer for every 320 people. Japan has one for every 8,195 people and Korea has one for every 15,748. By your reasoning Japan must be society of primitive agrarians and Korea must be inhabited by tribes of hunter gathers. Our laws aren’t long and complicated because the cover complex subjects, but because they are deliberated obfuscated so people won’t understand them. I remember reading parts of the climate bill last year where they went on for several pages and after hours reading it I figured out out they were carving out a special exception for California. Of course, they could say that the laws apply to every state, except California, hence the obfuscation. Long complicated laws also end up being Rube Goldberg devices that end up being very inefficient and sometimes accomplishing no net work at all. I remember the climate bill had one section that cut down trees as biofuel and another section that planted them as carbon sinks. We have bills that are thousands of pages long and often have 100s of pages of amendments that are put in hours before the votes, not because the issues are complex, but because they don’t want people, including the members of congress, to know what they are voting on. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/33 "2011-08-31T18:32:37Z")
Lobbyists! There ya go! ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/34 "2011-08-31T18:50:23Z")
Human Resources. Ship 'em out. ---
**Author:** ![Snickers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Snickers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snickers)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/35 "2011-08-31T18:51:02Z")
> [@bump](#): > > …I very politely said (in my normal Gulf Coast/SE Texas accent) “Well, ma’am, I’m not from here. I don’t think I’m eligible to sign up.”, meaning that I’m an American, and probably not an eligible petitioner to the Crown or whoever. Heh. I spent a semester in Australia in college, and would give people like these all of my time and attention until they realized that I was no good to them. I talked to the Australian equivalent of ROTC - I think he twigged on after I said “Sure,” but asked me where I was from anyway. Then he smiled and said thanks and let me go. I was kind of sad that Greenpeace in Brisbane didn’t want me, though - just because I’m an American in Australia doesn’t mean I don’t care about the environment! ETA: During our short talk, the Greenpeace reps specifically said that they were trying to drum up local support, and then thanked me for talking with them anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/36 "2011-08-31T18:52:03Z")
Reality television stars! ---
**Author:** ![Snickers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Snickers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snickers)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2011, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/37 "2011-08-31T18:58:07Z")
huh. no idea what happened there. Removing dupe post. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/38 "2011-09-14T20:09:35Z")
> [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](#): > > Human Resources. Ship 'em out. If you ever face losing your job for unfair reasons, you’ll be glad HR exists. I sure was, once upon a time. Among other things, HR made sure my department gave me a generous severance and guaranteed unemployment benefits. May I nominate paid lobbyists? ---
**Author:** ![No\_umlaut\_for\_U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ea5d25/32.png) [@No\_umlaut\_for\_U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/No_umlaut_for_U)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/39 "2011-09-14T20:21:54Z")
I’m considering cable installers/repairers unless the third time’s a charm. Authors of vampire novels. Anne Rice can stay, however. ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612/40 "2011-09-15T01:58:36Z")
Administrators. Their numbers are growing like some kind of cancer. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nominate-a-profession-for-the-golgafrincham-b-ark/594612.md?page=1)