# Non-Human characters you'd date **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 30, 2006, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763 "2006-08-30T06:29:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/1 "2006-08-30T06:29:53Z")
Since there’s a thread about literary crushes, this isn’t much stranger, right? Non-humans include those formerly human (vampires, werecreatures and I guess zombies) and those that are never were human like aliens, elves, and other magical creatures. Let’s leave out witches and wizards, since they’re basically human, though. So, if they were real, obviously, which characters would you consider relationship material despite their inhuman status? How come? **Nawat** (Trickster’s Choice & Trickster’s Queen) Sure, he’s a crow that was so facinated by humans that he decided to assume human form, but you can’t really hold it against the guy. He’s pretty witty (not a birdbrain, surprisingly), handy, and really really loyal. But on the other hand, he doesn’t let himself be taken for granted by the one he’s devoted to. Perfect. **The Phouka** (War For The Oaks) Unsurprisingly, he’s a phouka aka pooka; a shapeshifting type of fairyfolk. Some times he’s a large dog, at others a handsome black man. Despite a perchance for playing pranks, he’s a good ally, and _very_ smooth. Not to mention that he’s a win at any cost (except maybe your life) kind of guy. **Max Evans** (Roswell) He’s handsome, and…um… well, he can heal you if you ever get shot, so that’s good too. And did I mention that he’s handsome? ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/2 "2006-08-30T06:48:04Z")
Seven of Nine, …yes I know she was but even so. T’Pol ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/3 "2006-08-30T07:11:40Z")
[Lt. M’Ress.](http://www.danhausertrek.com/AnimatedSeries/MRess.html) ---
**Author:** ![Mbossa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/73ab20/32.png) [@Mbossa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mbossa)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 7:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/4 "2006-08-30T07:48:26Z")
Babs Bunny…mmmmmm… ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 11:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/5 "2006-08-30T11:51:51Z")
**Sy Borg** A tiny chrome-plated machine That looks like a magical pig With marital aids stuck all over it ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/6 "2006-08-30T12:04:55Z")
I’ve always had a secret crush on Justin, the rat from _Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH_ (later titled _The Secret of NIMH_, of course.) The movie didn’t help - he was just so strong and confident and dreamy, and he buckled when he swashed. Or something. ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/7 "2006-08-30T12:08:51Z")
Same as I said in the “literary crushes” thread, Discworld’s Angua. She may look human (most of the time), but she’s not, so she qualifies. She’s cool, tough, beautiful, smart, confident, an initiative-taker sexually and can defeat ten bandits in thirty seconds - what’s not to like? I’d totally date the Brad Pitt version of Louis Pointe du Lac (not the whiny boring book version). It’s not entirely clear if he retains amorous/sexual inclinations after his transformation, but I’ll take the chance. There must be some who don’t look human too… well, there are plenty that I wouldn’t mind some intimate knowledge of ([_cough_ Thundercats! _cough_](http://geocities.com/TelevisionCity/1356/cats.htm)), but as for actual dating relationship stuff… Leela from _Futurama_, of course. Hey, I’ve got a thing for ass-kicking women, no matter their number of eyes. Unfortunately, I have no clue what she’d see in me. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/8 "2006-08-30T12:09:41Z")
[QUOTE=Ranchoth] [Lt. M’Ress.](http://www.danhausertrek.com/AnimatedSeries/MRess.html) [/QUOTE] And you’d have competion, Bub. Oddly, there’s a certain [Orc Girl](http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Dungeon/9979/orcchr.htm) I might be interested in. And, of course, Elves. But **not** Pratchett Elves! ---
**Author:** ![Autumn\_Almanac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d26b3c/32.png) [@Autumn\_Almanac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autumn_Almanac)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/9 "2006-08-30T13:25:31Z")
I’ve always had a soft spot for Ryoko of the _Tenchi Muyo!_ franchise. Especially in _Tenchi Muyo! in Love 2_. ---
**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/10 "2006-08-30T13:44:03Z")
There are probably a lot I would be willing to ask out on a date. Fictional characters are generally better spoken, more intelligent, and funnier than real people, and with real people the odds that you’re going to be well spoken, intelligent, and funnier makes the odds that you will also be a complete and total babe go down a ways. Also translated as, “I’m not going to write a list because anything that long would look too geeky.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/11 "2006-08-30T14:47:50Z")
**Jessica Rabbit** , of course. And the Bette Midler-bot from the remake of **The Stepford Wives**. She had a rotisserie in her stomache! ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/12 "2006-08-30T14:50:12Z")
The Time Lord’s an alien, right? Also, Mr. Tumnus in his current movie-incarnation. It’s probably just James McAvoy, but… ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/13 "2006-08-30T14:57:39Z")
Dunkelzahn the dragon, from the RPG _Shadowrun_–in human form, of course. Always had a soft spot from him. Legolas wouldn’t be bad, either, especially if he looked like his portrayal in the movie… 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/14 "2006-08-30T15:14:51Z")
Wakko Warner. Don’t ask me why, I don’t know. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/15 "2006-08-30T17:00:23Z")
Smurfette. Jabba the Hutt. Treebeard. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/16 "2006-08-30T17:07:30Z")
Yosemite Sam. He a prospector’s prospector. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/17 "2006-08-30T17:36:52Z")
Saavik. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/18 "2006-08-30T17:42:14Z")
I’m having a surprisingly hard time finding a really good, representative picture of the lovely **Mamzelle Hepzibah** from Pogo online. Even the official Pogopossum site doesn’t have its characters page working, and stills of the animated version don’t cut it. ---
**Author:** ![Lips\_Obsession](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bbce88/32.png) [@Lips\_Obsession](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lips_Obsession)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/19 "2006-08-30T17:46:17Z")
I have to second Seven of Nine…especially in her later Voyager episodes holo-fantasies fancy duds… ---
**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763/20 "2006-08-30T17:48:17Z")
Legolas. Superman. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/non-human-characters-youd-date/370763.md?page=2)