# Not a post-count party

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [August 6, 2000, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330 "2000-08-06T15:46:12Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/21 "2000-08-06T18:14:45Z")

</div>

Hey, good to have you, Silver\_Fire!

Feel free to not do either of those things. And where aren’t all the women? We need women if we’re not going to throw a proper party. Ultress showed up, but she didn’t bring friends.

I’m sure you won’t be able to find all the drinks that aren’t available.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/22 "2000-08-06T18:22:18Z")

</div>

Brat:  
Ok thanks for the beer. I am going to drink it but not in a celebratory fashion. Then if you don’t mind would you see if you could locate some chea…err mm cold champagne?

ultress:

> [@](#):
>
> Aha, wish you had some of the rain we got, three weeks of rain every day. But no complaints here, for the past few summers we’ve had droughts too.

Thanks ultress…

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/23 "2000-08-06T18:22:58Z")

</div>

Hey, can somebody please not hand me a beer? I think this is getting close to not being my 300th post, but I never look at the number, so I’m not sure.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![ultress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7c8e57/32.png) [@ultress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultress)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/24 "2000-08-06T18:34:51Z")

</div>

Anything for my best friend, aha. I’m not gonna smooch and hug on you since I’m not partying. And I’m not gonna get slobbering drunk and dance on the table.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/25 "2000-08-06T18:40:54Z")

</div>

Hey ultress . . .

I don’t have $50 here for you to not get undressed and dance for us. (I know you never mentioned getting undressed, but there’s only $30 not in it for you if you just not dance.)

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![aha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eada6e/32.png) [@aha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aha)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/26 "2000-08-06T18:50:55Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> Anything for my best friend, aha. I’m not gonna smooch and hug on you since I’m not partying. And I’m not gonna get slobbering drunk and dance on the table.

and I am not gonna enjoy the hell out of it ultress…I have to be careful tho… because I have been accused in another thread of kissing your ass. 😉

My answer to that was “Mark the spot.”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![ultress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7c8e57/32.png) [@ultress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultress)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/27 "2000-08-06T18:52:39Z")

</div>

Brat, the $30 that you don’t have won’t get me dance, but getting undressed is not worth $500 that you don’t have so I’ll stay dressed (am I getting confused or what?)

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/28 "2000-08-06T18:59:45Z")

</div>

Chronos neglects to stop in, and doesn’t kick back with a can of un-Pepsi, and doesn’t snap his fingers for one of the non-scantily clad women who doesn’t exist to stay where she is and not give him a personal show.

By the way, Bratman, not that I’m asking, but does this whole unParty thing fail to work when the cops don’t show up? And is going to neglect to strip for us, or not?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Scotticher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Scotticher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scotticher)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/29 "2000-08-06T19:28:06Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by BratMan007 \*  
> \*\* Go ahead and not ask for a lap dance from one of the women I haven’t hired as entertainment. \*\*

Pssst Bratman-

I am a woman, so lap-dancing women hold no interest for me. But, thanks for the offer!

Hope things are not moving along the way you don’t want them to! 😉

Scotti

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/30 "2000-08-06T19:36:43Z")

</div>

\<wandering by, purplebear just happens to hear some faint sounds of people not talking and not music being played, so she opens the door and steps inside, not wearing her purple bikini and open white lace shirt\>

\<walking up to BratMan as he’s not drinking something from a not empty keg, she doesn’t grab him and pull him down for a deep kiss of congratulation\>

\<clearing her throat after that wow! non-kiss, she says\> I am not thirsty though, is there some of that non-Bacardi and coke not available?  
Ok, now I’m getting confused here. 😛 I hope that came out right…errr… _didn’t_ come out right…err…

Never mind. 😉

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/31 "2000-08-06T19:41:12Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Scotticher \*  
> **I am a woman, so lap-dancing women hold no interest for me. But, thanks for the offer!**

Um, sorry. I feel so stupid now. Do you think we can ask the mods to put like the little symbols next to the user names to denote male or female to avoid just this sort of thing from happening?

I would also reply to **Chronos’s** post, but quite frankly, it confused the hell out of me.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/32 "2000-08-06T19:44:50Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by purplebear \*  
> **\<walking up to BratMan as he’s not drinking something from a not empty keg, she doesn’t grab him and pull him down for a deep kiss of congratulation\>**

I believe the proper response here would be from the wise and wonderful Jackie Gleason: _homina homina homina_

Nice to have you here, PB. You can help yourself to anything that’s not here. It’s all free. And when your finished not having your drink, I’ll gladly escort you to the hot tub that isn’t in the backroom.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/33 "2000-08-06T19:56:34Z")

</div>

There’s not a hot tub in the back room? I’m _so_ not there. Lead the way, please, my dear. 😃

And, I am also a bit confused by Chrono’s post. Is _who_ going to not strip for whom? 😕

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![2nd\_Law](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/2/f475e1/32.png) [@2nd\_Law](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2nd_Law)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/34 "2000-08-06T19:57:15Z")

</div>

\<not gesturing to Silver Fire because I don’t want her to not give me a lap dance\>

I don’t think this isn’t getting unconfusing… I must not need another un-beer!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/35 "2000-08-06T20:03:42Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by purplebear \*  
> \*\*There’s not a hot tub in the back room? I’m _so_ not there. Lead the way, please, my dear. \*\*

OK, I’ll not be taking PB to the back room where there isn’t a hot tub. Everyone be sure not to entertain yourselves until I don’t come back. I want to make sure everyone’s not having fun, since this isn’t a party after all!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Anniz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/cc9497/32.png) [@Anniz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anniz)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/36 "2000-08-06T20:04:37Z")

</div>

Since this is a no party celebration,  
I’m not here and I don’t want a beer  
and I’m not saying congratulations,  
well, not in English, but I say it in  
Swedish, is that okey?  
**Gratulerar!**

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/37 "2000-08-06T20:09:09Z")

</div>

Oh, hey a Swedish chick!

Would you care to not join purplebear and myself in the backroom? If sure you won’t be able to find the hot tub that isn’t there if you don’t look hard enough.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Anniz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/cc9497/32.png) [@Anniz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anniz)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/38 "2000-08-06T20:15:38Z")

</div>

Since it’s not there, I’ll not join you.  
I always behave or is it not behave???  
I’m starting to get confuse here…  
and I don’t even had a beer, yet,  
or did I…

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/39 "2000-08-06T20:23:36Z")

</div>

**Anniz** -  
I’ve been confused for the past 30 posts. I find the only thing to make my brain stop hurting is to shut it off and go with the feeling.

I’m sure purplebear doesn’t mind if you don’t join us. And if you don’t want a beer, they’re right over there where the kegs aren’t. Or maybe you’d prefer to not have a mixed drink from the bar?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Catrandom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7bcc69/32.png) [@Catrandom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catrandom)\
**Post date:** [August 6, 2000, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330/40 "2000-08-06T20:25:32Z")

</div>

Well, I won’t be stopping by to get a beer because I don’t want to celebrate 1,000 posts, either. Wow! None of the men around here can really move when they haven’t had a few drinks! I didn’t think anybody didn’t do the Hustle anymore!

Catrandom

[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330.md?page=1)

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-a-post-count-party/28330.md?page=3)