# Not Coming To A Theater Near You **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 7, 2009, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742 "2009-11-07T23:23:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![wedgehed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8edcca/32.png) [@wedgehed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wedgehed)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2009, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/181 "2009-12-01T01:12:00Z")
**Ferris Ballou’s Day Off** - With his older sister off on a tri-state crime spree, young Ferris skips class to hang out in front of the feed store. ---
**Author:** ![eenerms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cdc98d/32.png) [@eenerms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eenerms)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2009, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/182 "2009-12-01T05:55:09Z")
**A Cora Line** : an animated story of a girl doing high kicks and eating a lot. ---
**Author:** ![Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f08c70/32.png) [@Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crowbar_of_Irony_3)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2009, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/183 "2009-12-01T06:18:22Z")
**The Day after Tommorow Never Dies** : James Bond must prevent a cunning mastermind who is going to set off tidal waves to destroy US coastline cities! **Star Trek: Armaggedon** : USS Enterprise under the command of Captain Picard must travel in time to Earth to provide diaster relief when a meterorite strike. **The Scorpion King of Scotland** : A journalist covers the reign of an immortal king since the times of Sodom, who nows stage an insurrection in South Amercia ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2009, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/184 "2009-12-01T07:11:24Z")
**In Her Majesty’s Victoria’s Secret** James Bond finds a sinister plot in the Queen’s underwear drawer. **Last Year at Bad Marion’s** Upper class snobs recount a bizarre night at an upscale bordello. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2009, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/185 "2009-12-01T08:15:07Z")
Fantastic Misses’ Box A direct to DVD Porno. ---
**Author:** ![wedgehed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8edcca/32.png) [@wedgehed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wedgehed)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2009, 8:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/186 "2009-12-01T08:57:41Z")
**My Big Fat Greek Ass** - The honeymoon is over. ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2009, 9:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/187 "2009-12-01T09:14:11Z")
**Dragon** - It’s a story about a fucking dragon, OK, because that’s how you spell dragon. ---
**Author:** ![wedgehed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8edcca/32.png) [@wedgehed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wedgehed)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2009, 10:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/188 "2009-12-01T10:45:20Z")
**My Fair _Laaady_!** - Jerry Lewis tutors a perfectly normal young girl in the ways of cretinism. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2009, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/189 "2009-12-02T21:57:14Z")
**Flags of Our Fahdders:** Tony Curtis climbs Mt. Surabachi. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2009, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/190 "2009-12-02T22:21:04Z")
**She-Man:** When danger threatens, a weak prince transforms into an Amazon Warrior to fight evil. Contains wacky subplot where Prince Herman’s best buddy keeps hitting on She-Man. ---
**Author:** ![UncaStuart](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/uncastuart/32/404_2.png) [@UncaStuart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncaStuart)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2009, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/191 "2009-12-02T22:56:31Z")
**The Blind Sideways:** Uplifting story of a ghetto youth taken in by a rich family who discover he has an amazing palatte for wine tasting. Awesome scene in the crackhouse when he’s offered a glass of merlot. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/192 "2009-12-03T04:53:46Z")
**The man With the Golden Eye, Arm Finger, and Gun:** Mr Scaramanga dabbles in alchemy. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/193 "2009-12-03T15:55:17Z")
**Avatarbaby**. _Song of the South_… in 3-D CGI! ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/194 "2009-12-03T16:19:18Z")
**Three Men and Rosemary’s Baby:** 3 single men try to raise the Antichrist, hilarity ensues. **Lord of the Ring:** Comfortable in retirement Bilbo Baggins receives a mysterious VHS tape. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/195 "2009-12-03T16:30:11Z")
**Tora! Bora! Bora!** : Some Japanese pilots decide they’d rather hit the beach instead. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/196 "2009-12-03T16:32:50Z")
Tit Antics II - In this sequel to Titanic Rose stupidly refuses to sell the Heart of the Ocean to support herself. So she puts her new found nude posing skills to work to earn some money. Hilarity ensues. ---
**Author:** ![Serenata67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/serenata67/32/10646_2.png) [@Serenata67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Serenata67)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/197 "2009-12-03T17:38:57Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#): > > - > > Bruces Almighty\* - The members of the Philosophy Department of the University of Woolloomooloo face an existential crisis when they are temporarily given divine powers. YES!! ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/198 "2009-12-03T19:55:08Z")
> [@Sitnam](#): > > **Three Men and Rosemary’s Baby:** 3 single men try to raise the Antichrist, hilarity ensues. > > **Lord of the Ring:** Comfortable in retirement Bilbo Baggins receives a mysterious VHS tape. Lord of The Ring: “777 pages from now you will lose your finger” Thin Blue Line: A small group of Smurfs must fight an evil horde. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/199 "2009-12-03T20:22:06Z")
**What’s New, Crouching Tiger Lily?** Just switch a few subtitles, and POW a comedy! **The Dork Knight:** Bruce Wayne starts posting on the SDMB! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2009, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/200 "2009-12-03T20:36:31Z")
**The Last Sam-I-Am:** Tom Cruise introduces green eggs and ham to the Japanese [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742.md?page=11)