# Not Coming To A Theater Near You **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 7, 2009, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742 "2009-11-07T23:23:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 38
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2010, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/741 "2010-06-14T01:14:25Z")
**Repo Man: The Genetic Opera:** A white suburban punk pays for his plastic surgery addiction by stealing cars. That glowing green car has aliens in the trunk Aliens in the trunk? Aliens in the trunk ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2010, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/742 "2010-06-15T20:06:06Z")
**Gone in 60 days:** A car thief returns from jail only to find out he’s being evicted from his apartment. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2010, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/743 "2010-06-16T20:01:59Z")
**The A is A Team:** Objectivist mercenaries fight for their own self interest and against the forces of altruism. Famous for the scene where they switch sides when offered more money. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/744 "2010-06-17T13:26:39Z")
> [@Hypno-Toad](#): > > **Song of the Sith** : The tales of Qui-Gon Remus and his encounters with Br’er Sidious and Br’er Maul. WIN! a ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/745 "2010-06-17T18:56:28Z")
**Hatch** - A conservative senator retires from politics and then starts an agency to teach lobbyists how to influence the politician of their dreams. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/746 "2010-06-17T19:11:54Z")
**The Scarlet Pimp:** During the French Revolution, a masked man whores out fugitive aristocrats. ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2010, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/747 "2010-06-17T20:46:40Z")
**The Ex-Terminator** : In an alternate timeline of the Terminator saga, the T-100, programmed with Windows 12 OS, is infected with a worm that causes it to fight on the side of mankind. ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2010, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/748 "2010-06-21T15:28:32Z")
AAA - The government recruits a non-assuming insurance agent to infiltrate an organization bent on reducing the world to a state of anarchy. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2010, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/749 "2010-06-21T15:56:05Z")
**W for Vendetta** - a dyslexic burn victim battles to free England from her fascist oppressors. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2010, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/750 "2010-06-21T18:23:52Z")
**Fat on a Hot Tin Roof:** Thee story of the development of the first solar powered deep fryer. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/751 "2010-06-23T14:25:12Z")
**Soldiers, Once, We Were** : Yoda remembers his days in the Air Cavalry in 'Nam. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2010, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/752 "2010-06-23T14:26:24Z")
Very nice. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/753 "2010-06-24T13:29:11Z")
\*\*MacGruden \*\*- With 20 seconds left to play, and no timeouts, and his contract in jeopardy, a coach must defuse a long bomb being thrown by a terrorist quarterback. **Zapruder** - An amateur filmmaker has 20 seconds to defuse a bomb that will destroy the Presidential Archives that contain the information about the Kennedy Assassination. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/754 "2010-06-24T16:52:31Z")
**Gangs of New Zealand** - following the defeat of Sauron by the Men and Elves, isolated groups of Orcs run rampant through the countryside. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/755 "2010-06-24T19:53:15Z")
**Robbin’ Hood:** An outlaw steals from the rich, but never gets around to giving to the poor. ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/756 "2010-06-24T19:58:04Z")
**Boyz in the Robin Hood** : The word is out–this man in tights is light in the moccasins; he hangs out in the Sherwood Forest Rambles, giving it all away. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/757 "2010-06-24T20:15:34Z")
**Jonah X:** A disfigured white cowboy joins the Nation of Islam. Rated R-Squared for Racism in multiple directions. ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2010, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/758 "2010-06-24T20:26:18Z")
> [@Johnny\_Q](#): > > **Jonah X:** A disfigured white cowboy joins the Nation of Islam. Rated R-Squared for Racism in multiple directions. Well played, sir! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2010, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/759 "2010-06-25T05:50:04Z")
**Viva Vulvazela:** The story of the world’s horniest horn. Currently playing in a double feature with **The Crotchflute Chronicles** Not reccomended for those with sensitive sensibilities or stomachs. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2010, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/760 "2010-06-25T14:37:08Z")
**500 Days of Sumer:** The story of a young man pining for the Mesopotamian city that doesn’t love him back. **Superbald:** The story of the only student to be held back 23 times. On a side note, does Mace Windu have a wallet that says, “Bald Motherfucker?” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742.md?page=37) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742.md?page=39)