# Not Coming To A Theater Near You **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 7, 2009, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742 "2009-11-07T23:23:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 44
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2010, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/862 "2010-08-02T20:36:11Z")
**Edumacating Rita** : A young, inner-city hairdresser goes to junior college to better herself, only to find herself alienated from her _girl_friends as she discovers new worlds outside the ghetto. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2010, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/863 "2010-08-02T22:13:52Z")
**The Tree Amigos:** Hilarity ensues when a group of singing tree surgeons are called upon to vanquish a Mexican bandit. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2010, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/864 "2010-08-02T22:17:24Z")
**Eat Prey, Love:** A predator gets amorous with its dinner. Not necessarily in the Traditional Order. ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2010, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/865 "2010-08-03T00:16:39Z")
Pepper: Whoppi Goldberg stars as a kick ass CIA agent accused of betraying her country. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2010, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/866 "2010-08-03T00:55:29Z")
**Dr. Strangleglove** : a crippled physicist’s prosthetic hands have an evil mind of their own. ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2010, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/867 "2010-08-03T01:09:58Z")
Mr. and Mrs. Smith-Smith II: Jane Smith decides to keep her fake name after a divorce and re-marriage. ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2010, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/868 "2010-08-03T13:23:02Z")
Kiss Ass: World’s wimpiest super “hero” or Guy flatters villains and pretends to become their best friend, then stabs them in the back. ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2010, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/869 "2010-08-03T13:24:44Z")
**The 80 year old Virgin:** An octogenarian with cancer tries to get laid before she dies. Rated B for Borrrrrrrring ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2010, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/870 "2010-08-03T19:52:17Z")
**A Shit in the Dark:** Inspector Clouseau has to relieve himself in the middle of the night. Made entirely with scraps from the cutting room floor. And yes, it is as bad as you think it is. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2010, 7:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/871 "2010-08-05T07:40:25Z")
**Scots Pilgrim:** In order to win the hand of a Fair Maiden, A horny Scotsman must visit seven holy sites and kill the resident Bishop at each place. ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2010, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/872 "2010-08-05T18:37:33Z")
Some Like It Hoth: With the Empire closing in, Han Solo and Luke Skywalker must disguise themselves as women and join an all-girl band to escape detection. ---
**Author:** ![Loisseau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/2bfe46/32.png) [@Loisseau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loisseau)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2010, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/873 "2010-08-05T19:37:04Z")
**Barry Lyndon’s Johnson** : Once the ridicule of the court for lifting beagles up by their ears, Barry garners attention in a different way by inventing a penis vacuum pump and now needs a XXL codpiece. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2010, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/874 "2010-08-10T07:57:05Z")
**Oh Godzilla:** A huge fire breathing radioactive lizard has trouble convincing people he exists. ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2010, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/875 "2010-08-10T16:01:18Z")
Airbender: The Last Avatar: 14 year old kid must pretend he’s a blue alien to defeat evil corporation bent on stealing our world’s cliches. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2010, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/876 "2010-08-10T21:51:44Z")
**Driving Miss Crazy** : Transporting dementia patients can be a tough job, but this lady takes the cake! ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2010, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/877 "2010-08-10T23:47:09Z")
**One Flew Over The Cuckold’s Nest** : A psychiatrist, trying to treat a man incarcerated for sex offenses, brings the man home for the weekend where he proceeds to seduce the psychiatrist’s wife, mistress, daughter, secretary and widowed mother. At the end, the psychiatrist orders him lobotomized. ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2010, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/878 "2010-08-10T23:52:02Z")
**There Will Be Mud** : Noah plans ahead for when the forty days’ rains end and he faces challenges drilling for oil. ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2010, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/879 "2010-08-11T00:37:15Z")
Mothman’s Diary: An aging superhero reflects on past glory. Waiting to Inhale: The college life of Bill Clinton. Runaway, Bride!: A serial killer takes out wedding guests one at a time. ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2010, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/880 "2010-08-11T04:53:14Z")
Paddyshack: A boy dreams of winning the World Championships of Paddy Cake. The Wizard of Ozy: Ramses II hires a new adviser with the power to send enemies to Kansas. Silence of the Rams: Crazed by years of losing and mismanagement, one football fan takes it too far. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2010, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/881 "2010-08-12T01:26:51Z")
**Dog Day Afternoon Delight** : When the police surround the bank, the robbers decide to make the best of a bad situation… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742.md?page=43) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742.md?page=45)