# Not Coming To A Theater Near You **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 7, 2009, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742 "2009-11-07T23:23:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2009, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/121 "2009-11-18T23:30:51Z")
**Harry Pothead The Stoned Sorcerer:** When the stress of being the Chosen One getss to be too much, The Boy Who Lived decides to take some time and mellow out. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2009, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/122 "2009-11-23T16:43:35Z")
**Enema at the Gates** : Jude Law learns to guard his rear. **Great, Balls On Fire!:** Jerry Lee Lewis just can’t sit down when he’s at the piano. **Uncle Bucs:** The Tampa NFL franchise must take care of their brothers’ kids for the weekend. **The Curious Case of Private Bejamin Button:** By the time she finishes boot camp, Goldie Hawn is only half the age of when she started it. **Where the Wilde Things Are** : Oscar and co. camp it up. ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2009, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/123 "2009-11-24T01:32:50Z")
The Legend Of Downfall River: Lizzy Borden and Adolf Hitler go on a date. I got this Idea from Netflix Recommends: A Fish called Ghandi: Fish goes on hunger strike to protest unfair treatment by humans. ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2009, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/124 "2009-11-24T01:35:21Z")
> [@Hypno-Toad](#): > > **The Curious Case of Private Bejamin Button:** By the time she finishes boot camp, Goldie Hawn is only half the age of when she started it. We all feel like we aged two lifetimes after we finished watching it. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2009, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/125 "2009-11-24T01:43:11Z")
**Conchords: Airport '10:** New Zealand’s fourth greatest digi-Folk band are all that stands in the way of disaster when a high tech passenger plane is about to crash. With Karl Malden as the Mad Bomber. ---
**Author:** ![wedgehed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8edcca/32.png) [@wedgehed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wedgehed)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2009, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/126 "2009-11-24T06:20:36Z")
**The Best Goodyears of Our Lives** - Returning war vets get a great deal on a set of tires. ---
**Author:** ![wedgehed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8edcca/32.png) [@wedgehed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wedgehed)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2009, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/127 "2009-11-24T06:40:12Z")
**Escape To Brokeback Mountain** - Two stranded space travelers race towards a rendezvous that could take them to Uranus. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2009, 8:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/128 "2009-11-24T08:47:40Z")
**Piranha on a Bus:** A madman’s plot to hide carnivorous fish on public transit as part of an extortion scheme works rather less well than he planned. ---
**Author:** ![wedgehed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8edcca/32.png) [@wedgehed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wedgehed)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2009, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/129 "2009-11-24T10:25:10Z")
**Mutiny On The Trip To Bountiful** - An old woman commandeers a bus, leaving the driver & passengers stranded & forced to walk all the way back to town. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2009, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/130 "2009-11-24T13:09:53Z")
**Bob and Carol and Ted and Alice and Master and Commander and Turner and Hooch:** A K-9 cop investigates a swingin’ situation on board a frigate in the Napoleonic war. ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2009, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/131 "2009-11-24T13:34:04Z")
**Snacks on a Plane** When a container-load of pretzels and Cheezelets goes missing at 37,000ft, there’s only one man who can save the day! (Contains infrequent salty language; not suitable for nut allergy sufferers.) **Allens in the Attic** A group of children on vacation fight a horde of neurotic Jewish film-makers that have invaded their home. **Drag Me to Hull** A loan officer ordered to evict an old woman from her home finds herself the recipient of a supernatural curse, which obliges her to live out her days in a bleak industrial town on the east coast of England. **Million Dollar Babby** They need to do way instain figther\> who hit thier oponnents. becuse these boxxes cant frigth back it was on the news this mroing a laddy in ca who had fougth her three box. they are taking the laddy back to mo too lady to rest my pary are with the traininger who lost his figther ; i am truley sorry for your lots **Turn After Reading** Gritty British road movie following a sales rep in his Ford Mondeo as he leaves the M4 at junction 12 (Theale, Pangbourne) en route to a rendezvous in Purley-on-Thames. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2009, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/132 "2009-11-24T18:00:34Z")
**Triumph of the Wii:** Like Call of Duty but with a REALLY alternate ending. **Rock Band of Brothers:** The 101st uses it’s star power to airdrop into Normandy! **Logan’s Cannonball Run** : Logan must get across the country to reach sanctuary! ---
**Author:** ![KRC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/45deac/32.png) [@KRC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KRC)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/133 "2009-11-25T04:11:15Z")
**The Tetanic** The legendary maiden voyage of the greatest ship on Earth ends in tragedy due to rusty nails. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/134 "2009-11-25T06:13:05Z")
**The Master and Commander:** A renegade Timelord takes over a British warship as part of his plan to rule the universe. ---
**Author:** ![wedgehed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8edcca/32.png) [@wedgehed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wedgehed)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/135 "2009-11-25T06:20:10Z")
**The Way We Were Soldiers** - An unlikely romance blooms between a radical Jewish girl & a clean cut American boy after he napalms her kibbutz. ---
**Author:** ![zamboniracer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e9a140/32.png) [@zamboniracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zamboniracer)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/136 "2009-11-25T16:34:18Z")
**Gilmore Girlfriends** - Four sharp and sharp-tongued black women find themselves in a strange little town in Connecticut. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/137 "2009-11-25T17:55:06Z")
**The Sixth Element** : The worst ever Bruce Willis crossover. **Conan the Mediator:** Conan finally admits that violence never solves anything. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/138 "2009-11-25T19:38:59Z")
**Hannibals:** A mercenary, a murderous psychiatrist, and a reincarnated Carthaginian general meet in Mark Twain’s hometown. Hilarity, as always, ensues. ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/139 "2009-11-25T19:42:02Z")
> [@Johnny\_Q](#): > > **The Master and Commander:** A renegade Timelord takes over a British warship as part of his plan to rule the universe. The Master and Commander Captain Jack Harkness is demoted and has a love affair with The Master. ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2009, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742/140 "2009-11-25T19:53:32Z")
Bridge Over The River Kawaii; Dejiko is forced by Rabe-en-Rose to build a bridge. Bridge turns into giant robot and defeats Rabe-en-Rose. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-coming-to-a-theater-near-you/516742.md?page=8)