# Not for Amy **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 8, 2000, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789 "2000-06-08T19:27:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/41 "2000-06-09T15:05:08Z")
[This site](http://dailypennsylvanian.com/street/99_09_30/scubbin/scubbin.html) seems to answer teabagging and so much more. Gotta love the search power of Google. ---
**Author:** ![dook](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cdc98d/32.png) [@dook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dook)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/42 "2000-06-09T15:05:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*\* > > ok, now you’ve done it… forced me to get references. In other words, if I’m wrong, DAMNIT I’m taking the _L.A. Times_ down with me! > > > > [http://www.kiwi-magic.com/humour/rood/gerbil.htm](http://www.kiwi-magic.com/humour/rood/gerbil.htm) > > \*\* > > I think you’ve gotten yourself a UL there, dook. > > That is not a link to the LA Times, that is a link to a humor site claiming the story is from the LA Times. If you contact the Times, I doubt any trace of that story would be found. Here’s why I think so: > > \*\* I’m sure someone else has heard the same story. I heard it on the radio sometime during the summer of 96 (I remember that because I was working on a farm that summer, and I was listening to Steve & DC while mowing down a field of soybeans on a big green deere 🙂 They mentioned the LAT, and after I looked it up on the net that night, the story I found said it came from the LAT too. It had several quotes from specific people, not “some guy said: blah”. The link that I posted yesterday is in reference to the original article (which I did at one point have saved on my hard drive, several years ago). I couldn’t find the original because… well, who wants to sift through 20 pages of links about ‘felching’. But anyway, if it _is_ an urban legend, it’s truly remarkable that ALL of the names (of the people, the gerbil, the newspaper, etc) stayed the same? Don’t these things usually change around to “A nurse at the local hospital told me…” Ahhh well. I think this one was a true story but if anyone can come up with proof one way or another, I’d be happy to hear it. -dook ---
**Author:** ![Arnold\_Winkelried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/43 "2000-06-09T15:31:35Z")
In the Chick tract “The Gay Blade”, my favourite scene was the archeologist about to toss his cookies when discovering some old depictions of homosexuality. I’ll give Jack T. Chick credit though, he didn’t try to gloss over the fact of Lot’s pimping his young virgin daughters. ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/44 "2000-06-09T15:39:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > I was listening to Steve & DC . . . They mentioned the LAT, and after I looked it up on the net that night, the story I found said it came from the LAT too. > \*\* Did you read what you just typed? Steve and DC? Correct me if I’m wrong, but aren’t they trying to entertain an audience? The story you read said it came from the Times, but YOU DID NOT SEE IT IN THE TIMES, you are taking other people’s word for it. > [@](#): > > \*\* > It had several quotes from specific people, not “some guy said: blah”. > \*\* I can make up realistic sounding names. In fact, just the other day, my friends Dan Lonneberg, Steve Bowers, and Andy Dunworth, were just discussing how easily these things can happen. Said Andy Dunworth, an electrical engineer from the University of St Louis and president of the Electrical Workers of America, local 479, “It’s really amazing how some people can just tack names and some made up personal info onto a quote and other people will just believe it.” BTW, what’s the hospital spokeperson’s name? Doesn’t have one, does he? And yes, it is amazing that all the names remained the same in the ONE copy of this I have seen. How many copies of the story have you seen to know that ALL the names are the same? Cut and paste is a remarkable thing, isn’t it? > [@](#): > > \*\* > Ahhh well. I think this one was a true story but if anyone can come up with proof one way or another, I’d be happy to hear it. > \*\* One statement: _ **The hospital held a press conference!** _ That does not happen! Hosptials do not reveal the state of their patients! It is ILLEGAL! When you hear about a celebrity’s health status, it does not come from the hospital, it comes from spokesmen or family of the celebrity. Why would the hospital hold a press conference on rectal burns of a nobody, and why would LA Times publish a story that happened in Salt Lake City at a hospital that does not seem to exist? If this was ever published, it would have been in a Salt Lake paper. It seems unlikely the Times would publish a story about two bozos in Salt Lake. LA is a big enough town that it can fill a paper with its own news. I have done a search of the LA Times archive which goes back to 1990, and there are no stories found when I type gerbil, burn, felching, Salt Lake City in the browser. You can believe it all you want, but you submitted the story to us as true, I say it’s up to you to prove its validity, not up to us to disprove it. We can settle this. Call the Times. Ask them about this. They will deny it. ---
**Author:** ![Kiki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dc4da7/32.png) [@Kiki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiki)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/45 "2000-06-09T15:44:55Z")
Well, I guess you really do learn something new everyday. I now know the definitions for felching **AND** teabagging! Tea-bagging… that’s too funny. I’d like to see that happen at a party sometime! I’d be LMAO. ---
**Author:** ![vandal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/858c86/32.png) [@vandal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vandal)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/46 "2000-06-09T15:47:35Z")
Yeah, the site Mullinator provided pretty much describes what _tea bagging_ is. But I disagree with the passed out part. Tea bagging is just what it sounds like. A guy dips his scrotum in and out of one’s mouth. Sure, that person can be passed out (like it says at the site), but it is not a requirement. Now as for snowballing… This is when a guy ejaculates into one’s mouth (male or female), then kisses that person, thus transfering the remains. There’s a good reference to snowballing in the movie, _Clerks_. ---
**Author:** ![Moe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moe/32/2972_2.png) [@Moe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moe)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/47 "2000-06-09T19:33:34Z")
Well, I started this thread to learn about felching, yet I’ve learned so much more. BTW those chick tracts are among the funniest things I’ve read in a long time. I mean it. I was rolling out of my seat. Thank you all. ---
**Author:** ![dook](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cdc98d/32.png) [@dook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dook)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/48 "2000-06-09T20:05:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > I say it’s up to you to prove its validity, not up to us to disprove it. > \*\* I think you missed something here. I’m not _trying_ to prove anything to you, and I’m not trying to convince you one way or another, but let’s look at a couple of things that you said that struck me as… well, stupid. > [@](#): > > \*\* > YOU DID NOT SEE IT IN THE TIMES, you are taking other people’s word for it. > \*\* Yes, I was taking other people’s words for it… lots of other peoples. And if I had seen it in the times, I would have been taking _their_ word for it, since I was not there to witness it (thank God for that). > [@](#): > > \*\* > If this was ever published, it would have been in a Salt Lake paper. It seems unlikely the Times would publish a story about two bozos in Salt Lake. > \*\* I have **never** seen a newspaper that was filled with _only_ local news. I’m not saying that they don’t exist… but every paper I’ve read has stories about bozos in other cities, other countries… Lots of papers have sections about strange things such as the felching article in question. The one that my paper carries that contains stories like that is called “News of the Weird”. > [@](#): > > \*\* > And yes, it is amazing that all the names remained the same in the ONE copy of this I have seen. How many copies of the story have you seen to know that ALL the names are the same? > \*\* Again – these URLs still offer no proof of anything, and I am not offering them as such. But if you would like to dig through them all instead of just assuming that I’m lying to cover up for not having proof… here they are. [http://hjstar.postech.ac.kr/~yunsoh/realityIsFunny.html](http://hjstar.postech.ac.kr/~yunsoh/realityIsFunny.html) [http://www.mysticorp.com/html/humor12\_1\_96.html](http://www.mysticorp.com/html/humor12_1_96.html) [http://homepage.fcgnetworks.net/brenspc/Hurt3.HTM](http://homepage.fcgnetworks.net/brenspc/Hurt3.HTM) [http://www.actaeon.org/humor/zoonews1.html](http://www.actaeon.org/humor/zoonews1.html) [http://www.valaron.com/Jokes/kiki.htm](http://www.valaron.com/Jokes/kiki.htm) [http://www.gagler.com/Jokes/raggot.htm](http://www.gagler.com/Jokes/raggot.htm) [http://www-personal.umich.edu/~mhgraham/gerbil.txt](http://www-personal.umich.edu/~mhgraham/gerbil.txt) [http://www.emoti.com/archives/freak-flag/0039.html](http://www.emoti.com/archives/freak-flag/0039.html) [http://www.nwlink.com/~jimmyjr/gerbil.htm](http://www.nwlink.com/~jimmyjr/gerbil.htm) [http://www.csdl.tamu.edu/~marcus/STORIES/Raggot.txt](http://www.csdl.tamu.edu/~marcus/STORIES/Raggot.txt) [http://www.pedeyland.com/flipside/newsplus/gerbil.html](http://www.pedeyland.com/flipside/newsplus/gerbil.html) [http://www.lonekeep.com/BaudyHumor/too.htm](http://www.lonekeep.com/BaudyHumor/too.htm) [http://users.skynet.be/sexybones/art/stories.htm](http://users.skynet.be/sexybones/art/stories.htm) [http://www.shults.com/hypermail/jokes/0646.html](http://www.shults.com/hypermail/jokes/0646.html) Is that enough different copies for you to assume that maybe I’m not lying about the names being the same? Now, as for the ‘proof’. I can’t find any proof of this story happening, and I haven’t found anything that says it didn’t happen. And you know what? I don’t care. I beleived it when I heard it, and if I heard it on the radio tomorrow, I’d probably beleive it then too. I _do_ tend to be skeptical about a lot of things; I don’t beleive everything I hear or read, but I don’t automatically discount everything I hear as being false just because it sounds unlikely. As for the times… they haven’t returned my email yet. I assume they have more important things to worry about. I imagine they get a lot of people asking about this story, but in my quick scan I was unable to find a FAQ. Couldn’t find a “Salt Lake City Hospital” either. Oh darn. Oh… yes, and one more thing. > [@](#): > > \*\* > I just realized I can be very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very cranky without my cigarettes. > \*\* Truer words have never been spoken. I don’t think I gave you any reason to jump on my ass… So please either chill and be happy in the fact that you’re _probably_ right to disbeleive this story, or go have a smoke. -dook ---
**Author:** ![dook](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cdc98d/32.png) [@dook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dook)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/49 "2000-06-09T20:27:05Z")
Ok… finally, halfway down on the **7th** page of search results, I found a couple that claim the story as being false. > **[Urban Legends Store](https://shop.urbanlegends.com)** > > Shop exclusive music from the Official Urban Legends Store. [http://www.thewell.com/user/cynsa/hamster.html](http://www.thewell.com/user/cynsa/hamster.html) [http://www.stanford.edu/~zeade/public/humor/gerbil\_up\_the\_butt](http://www.stanford.edu/~zeade/public/humor/gerbil_up_the_butt) Now, granted… that is not “proof” that this story is false, as Bratman007 would be sure to point out. But I’ll happily take their word for it. Sheesh… and I thought I’d never get tired of hearing about “gerbil ass-cannons”. 😉 -dook of URL ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/50 "2000-06-09T21:12:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > I’m not _trying_ to prove anything to you, and I’m not trying to convince you one way or another, but let’s look at a couple of things that you said that struck me as… well, stupid. \*\* You cited it as a reference, therefore, you wanted me to accept it as true. And as for things striking people as . . . well, stupid . . . you cited a humor page as a reference. > [@](#): > > \*\* > Yes, I was taking other people’s words for it… lots of other peoples. And if I had seen it in the times, I would have been taking _their_ word for it > \*\* I was not referring to the fact that you were taking aother people’s word for it that it happened, a history book is someone else’s word for what happened, I meant you were taking someone else’s word for it that it was in the Times. > [@](#): > > \*\* > I have **never** seen a newspaper that was filled with _only_ local news. I’m not saying that they don’t exist… but every paper I’ve read has stories about bozos in other cities, other countries… Lots of papers have sections about strange things such as the felching article in question. The one that my paper carries that contains stories like that is called “News of the Weird”. > \*\* The Times carries news of the weird? My point there, which I admit was not very clear, was that it seems unlikely that the Times would carry a story like that, and all further stories would mention the Times, but no one refernced the story to a Salt Lake paper, where it allegedly happened. > [@](#): > > \*\* > \ > Is that enough different copies for you to assume that maybe I’m not lying about the names being the same? > \*\* I don’t recall ever saying you were lying about it. You also said you don’t disbelieve something because it sounds unlikely. This sounded more than unlikely to me simply because of the line that said the hospital held a press conference. Any hospital that would hold a press conference to make public the circumstances of a patient would get sued hard and fast, and the doctor who told would be quickly out of a job, or at least have his malpractice insurance rates skyrocket. > [@](#): > > \*\* > Truer words have never been spoken. (In reference to me being cranky without my smokes) I don’t think I gave you any reason to jump on my ass… So please either chill and be happy in the fact that you’re _probably_ right to disbeleive this story, or go have a smoke. > \*\* I don’t feel I ‘jumped your ass’ I took exception to someone posting a humor page as a reference, then chose to overlook obvious faults in the story (no hospital of that name, no name of the hospital spokesperson, the hospital holding a press conference) when I simply posted my reasons for believing that that was a UL. Go back and read my first post about this. Did I jump your ass, or did I simply state reasons why this is a likely UL? You continued to argue your points with me, which I then counter-argued. That’s called a discussion, or a debate (I know, this is the wrong place for those). I didn’t get mean, call you names, or call your thinking as . . . well, stupid. (Was any of my thinking any more stupid than believing a hospital would hold a press conference to discuss its patients?) I did get sarcastic, but I’m always like that. I am not cranky for lack of smokes, I was just staying true to the Straight Dope and tried to fight ignorance. And yes, I did see the other post about you finding claims that deny the validity of that story before I posted it. I just take offense to someone telling me that my thinking is stupid and suggesting all I need is a smoke when they don’t even know me. You can post whatever you want after this in regards to the butt-gerbil, I’m finished with it. ---
**Author:** ![Moe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moe/32/2972_2.png) [@Moe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moe)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/51 "2000-06-09T21:24:57Z")
When I was in 6th grade, we had a gerbil as a classroom pet. I don’t recall anyone ever sticking it up any butts though. But I do remember one day it got lost and we couldn’t find it anywhere. That quiet kid who always sat in the back corner, he was so sad that he just sat there wiggling the whole day. He always did seem to be especially close with it. Then it showed up again in its cage the next day. I guess it got home sick. Bye. ---
**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2000, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/52 "2000-06-10T05:20:52Z")
Are we going to have a whole bunch of “Amy threads” now? Filled with these…err…interesting practices? :eek: (At least the “Michelle threads” were pretty much PG-13 rated) ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2000, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/53 "2000-06-10T06:50:34Z")
With respect to Coventry, _Brewer’s_ says the phrase comes from Royalist prisoners captured in Birmingham being sent to Coventry, a Parliamentarian stronghold. The editors attribute the phrase to Clarendon’s _History of the Great Rebellion_, which is a contemporary account. However, _Brewer’s_ also gives the version that the townsfolk of Coventry did not like soldiers, and would taboo any woman seen talking to a soldier, “hence when a soldier was sent to Coventry he was cut off from all social intercourse.” [and presumably other types of intercourse too, but the editors of _Brewer’s_ are too high-minded to dwell on that possibility.] ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/54 "2000-06-18T16:34:50Z")
Look, I realize I’m a week or so late on this topic, But did any of y’all think to **CHECK WITH THE MASTER???** [Here](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2_216b.html) is what Cecil has to say on gerbiling. Unfortunately the follow up colums where Cecil spars with Chuck Shepard, the guy who writes “News of the Weird”( Hmmmm. Sounds like that should be MY newsletter.) are not included. Mr. Shepard ( whose work I enjoy, I read NOTW every week) admits that including gerbils in his rectal foreign bodies column was a mistake. The follow ups are included in the relevent book. ( I THINK it’s ROTSD ) Finaly, for those of you who are entirely TOO fascinated with this subject, I recomend the [Rectal Foreign Bodies](http://www.well.com/user/cynsa/newbutt.html) home page. Everything you need to know,_including X-rays!_ ---
**Author:** ![Moe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moe/32/2972_2.png) [@Moe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moe)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2000, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789/55 "2000-06-19T00:04:12Z")
Well, my original OP was actually on “felching”, not “gerbiling”, but WOW!! did you believe that list of things Cecil found in his research of foreign objects found up anuses. Whoa! and Ouch!! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-for-amy/21789.md?page=2)