# Not-so horny pandas
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-so-horny-pandas/293927
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [March 10, 2005, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-so-horny-pandas/293927 "2005-03-10T23:58:03Z")
**Posts on this page:** 9
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)
#### Post date: [March 10, 2005, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-so-horny-pandas/293927/1 "2005-03-10T23:58:03Z")
[http://slate.msn.com/id/2114661/](http://slate.msn.com/id/2114661/)
Poor pandas. Don’t the zookeepers know they can’t do it while their being watched?
Leave the poor things alone! 🙂
Quote of the Day:
> [@Slate Magazine](#):
>
> We don’t really know what turns them on.
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### Author:  [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)
#### Post date: [March 10, 2005, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-so-horny-pandas/293927/2 "2005-03-10T23:59:05Z")
Oh, and I forgot to mention what studs the rhinos are.
> [@Slate](#):
>
> In the wild, the white rhino lives in small herds; it turns out that a male needs to interact with a number of females in order to be properly aroused.
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### Author:  [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)
#### Post date: [March 11, 2005, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-so-horny-pandas/293927/3 "2005-03-11T00:29:31Z")
This is not the first time that panda breeding (or the lack thereof) has come up on the Dope. Back in 2002, **Zorro** was incensed enough to take on the subject in the Pit (a great thread IMHO).
Link: [Pandas can f\*\*\* off](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=136547)
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### Author:  [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)
#### Post date: [March 11, 2005, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-so-horny-pandas/293927/4 "2005-03-11T03:24:02Z")
Isn’t it the pandas they show the animal porn to?
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### Author:  [@Twoflower](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Twoflower)
#### Post date: [March 11, 2005, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-so-horny-pandas/293927/5 "2005-03-11T04:00:19Z")
You can spy on the pandas in question [here](http://nationalzoo.si.edu/Animals/GiantPandas/) .
Looks like they’re sleeping separately at the moment …
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### Author:  [@Mississippienne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mississippienne)
#### Post date: [March 11, 2005, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-so-horny-pandas/293927/6 "2005-03-11T05:47:05Z")
I think it was Robin Williams who said the female panda was probably one ugly panda bitch. Maybe that’s the problem. They just need to get the male panda drunk and put a bag over her head. 🙂
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### Author:  [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)
#### Post date: [March 11, 2005, 9:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-so-horny-pandas/293927/7 "2005-03-11T09:12:57Z")
Jeez, you’d think being endangered they’d at least _try_ to help us. But nooooo… 😛
> [@Zsofia](#):
>
> Isn’t it the pandas they show the animal porn to?
::knock on door::
Female Panda: _Who is it?_
Male Panda: _The plumber, ma’am_
Female Panda: _Oh dear it appears you have caught me without any clothes on…which is quite normal since I am a panda._
Male Panda: _Well that’s just fine…since I am a panda and have neither the dexterity, nor the opposable digits to do plumbing._
Female Panda: _Since we are both Pandas should we really be talking.?_
Male Panda: _Who cares? Let’s have sex…_
_WAKA CHIKA WAKA CHIKA WAKA CHIKA WAKA CHIKA WAKA CHIKA WAKA CHIKA WAKA CHIKA WAKA CHIKA_
Now available at all good retailers of cheap animal porn…
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### Author:  [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)
#### Post date: [March 12, 2005, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-so-horny-pandas/293927/8 "2005-03-12T01:29:26Z")
yep, they have panda porn for pandas; used on pandas in captivity. they (as far as i know, but really who knows what ideas scientist will come up with.) don’t set up porn theatrs in the wild.
pandas raised in captivity have little to no chance of happening on a “panda frolic.”
there is a theory that pandas in the wild may catch a brief glimpse of panda whoopie. they may then remember the glimpse and know what to do if a frolic opportunity occurs. of course with all the other repro. hurdles, pandas are thought to be rather nearsighted. i’m sure it is all just a blur for them.
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### Author:  [@The\_Hook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hook)
#### Post date: [March 12, 2005, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/not-so-horny-pandas/293927/9 "2005-03-12T01:38:10Z")
The only downside to Panda porn is that it’s in black and white.