I see what you did there.
Isn’t cork flooring catching on anywhere?
Heck, if bottlers change over, the government might have to subsidize the cork industry. Can you imagine more tax on bulletin boards?
Again, corks don’t permit air in; they permit gases built up during the long-term aging (after all the oxygen in the ullage has been reacted) to escape (and not through the body of the cork, which is nearly impervious, but around the sides). The early phases of aging (in oak, or for some white and ice wines, in stainless steel) may use some kind of mechanical closure, but few high end winemakers use screwcaps across their line. Corking of wine is rare as long as high quality cork is selected for the stoppers and the bottles are stored correctly (on their sides, the cork wetted by the wine, in a cool, dry, sun-free room with a consistently moderate humidity level). Unfortunately, some vintners don’t consistently follow the practice of using “old growth” cork (on a tree that has been already stripped two or three times. As the cork layer grows back (and in fact shedding the cork layer is a natural and healthy part of the tree’s growth cycle) it becomes more consistent and less porous. Good cork, though, is resilient and corking should be rare; I’ve only encountered two or three bottles of good wine that was definitively corked, and then likely because of poor handling and storage.
Mind you, screwtops are fine for most wine. Few reds, and almost no whites or fortified wines benefit from aging. Some of my favorite table wines are screwtops (the Bonny Doon wines, for instance) But personally, I like the ritual of opening the bottle with a flurish on the wine key and presentation of the removed cork.
I have to agree that the plastic corks are an abomination. The only reason they’re used is because they are cheaper than cork, and almost universally used on inferior quality wine.
Bravo, sir. Well played.
Stranger
Isn’t Añejos a tequila? And that’s one peculiar analogy to remark on whether gas exchange is desirable in wine aging.
Yeah. Mostly on the underflooring.
Any sommelier/waitron who does anything other than give the cork a glance to check for leakage and place it on the table out of the way is going to make me question the advisability of eating at that establishment. Presenting the cork is meaningless and annoying. What the hell am I supposed to do with it?
I love my cordless corkscrew. Works every time and I’ve never lost a cork.
So now all the upscale restaurants will have ‘screwing fees’?
Nod and say, “Yes, that’s fine, thank you.” What, were you raised in a barn?
Stranger
Manger, actually. Why do you ask? 
As the customer, if in fact you are buying a medium to higher-end wine, you should inspect it. Not smelling it, put squeezing it with your fingers. It should feel moist and not crumbly (unless its a very old wine). It helps give clues as to the wine’s storage.
Particularly if you’re blowing a huge wad of cash at restaurant prices on an aged, high end wine. You’d be surprised how many restaurants have expensive wines in their inventory that store them standing up in a makeshift “cellar” that’s 70 degrees F.
Good wines should always be stored on their sides. An old red wine that has sediment in it should be stood up hours prior to opening to allow it to settle to the bottom so its easily avoided.
You were supposed to say, “No, whorehouse.”
“Fear is not an option.”
Stranger
A sip will tell you a helluva lot more about the storage of a wine than the cork will. So why should I bother with the silly thing when the wine is right there in my glass?
If I’m blowing that kind of money, the sommelier had better be doing that before the cork ever gets near me. Thus, my comment about not trusting that establishment.
True, as will aromas, but the presentation of the cork is an observed tradition. All I was pointing out was that it isn’t entirely without meaning/substance.
No, not entirely. But meaningless (relatively) ritual should be, at the very least, soothing or comforting. I find the Cork Ritual (Orthodox and Reformed) to be irritating.
Again, my BIL the winemaker has no use for the presentation of the cork. He will smile at the waiter and put the cork down. The glass of wine is right there and will tell him all he needs to know. It may be an observed tradition, but I contend that it is entirely useless, and always has been.
Note to ralph124c: These go in Cafe Society. I’ll move this one there from The BBQ Pit.
Gfactor
Pit Moderator
“So is our electoral process. But we still vote.” – State and Main
Stranger
If I were presented with a rotten, crumbling cork, I’d make the sommelier taste it first.