# Nothing Ever Comes to No Good Up On Choctaw Ridge (Mysteries in pop music) **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 14, 2007, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012 "2007-12-14T17:31:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2007, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/61 "2007-12-14T23:53:54Z")
[QUOTE=Mangetout] It’s pretty clear from context that it was _14 k of g in a f p d_ [/QUOTE] Nope. It was the remains of the singer’s fetus after having a do-it-yourself abortion! (IIRC, that was one of the popular “urban myth” explanations.) ---
**Author:** ![Ichbin\_Dubist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ichbin\_Dubist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ichbin_Dubist)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/62 "2007-12-15T00:56:27Z")
I have to wonder how he know the train he heard in Folsom was going to San Antonio. Anyway, mysteries: there’s the fate of the protagonist in Tom Waits’ “Swordfishtrombone”: _Now some say he’s doing the obituary mambo and some say he’s hanging on the wall perhaps this yarn’s the only thing that holds this man together some say he was never here at all_ And the whereabouts of the eponymous Bill in Camper Van Beethoven’s “Where the Hell is Bill?”: _Maybe he went to get a mohawk And maybe he went to get some gnarly thrash boots Maybe he went to go ride his skateboard Maybe he went to see the Circle Jerks_ ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/63 "2007-12-15T02:14:14Z")
We never find out why the company had a sign saying “Long-Haired Freaky People Need Not Apply”. The hippie goes in to ask why, but gets sidetracked by an impromptu job offer. ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/64 "2007-12-15T09:16:32Z")
How can you mend a broken heart? How can a loser ever win? How can you stop the sun from Shining? What makes the world go 'round? What does “Doo Wah Diddy” mean? Who taught the Thompson Twins, Timbuk 3 and the Ben Folds Five how to count? ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/65 "2007-12-15T09:32:18Z")
Seriously… Was Natalie Merchant’s song “Wonder” about the Elephant Man? ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/66 "2007-12-15T13:59:26Z")
Who the fuck is Alice? ---
**Author:** ![11811](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/1/9d8465/32.png) [@11811](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/11811)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/67 "2007-12-15T16:47:37Z")
[QUOTE=Bricker] Are there any other enduring mysteries in pop music? [/QUOTE] Let’s start with the basics: What’s that smell? Can’t you smell that smell? Really, did something die in there? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/68 "2007-12-15T17:16:36Z")
[QUOTE=ElvisL1ves] Who the fuck is Alice? [/QUOTE] The one you’re supposed to ask? (Alice Liddell, of course.) Or the one who owns the restaurant? (No idea.) ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/69 "2007-12-15T17:30:54Z")
[\*This \* Alice.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CsrfovOPcjk) Stop, hey, what’s that sound? ---
**Author:** ![Sir\_Prize](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d2c977/32.png) [@Sir\_Prize](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sir_Prize)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/70 "2007-12-15T18:08:19Z")
[QUOTE=ElvisL1ves] Who the fuck is Alice? [/QUOTE] Go ask her. I think she’ll know. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/71 "2007-12-15T18:16:34Z")
[Quote=Ichbin Dubist] Anyway, mysteries: there’s the fate of the protagonist in Tom Waits’ “Swordfishtrombone”: [/QUOTE] Not to mention this one from _Mule Variations_: He has a router And a table saw… and you Won’t believe what Mr. Sticha saw There’s poison underneath the sink Of course… But there’s also Enough formaldehyde to choke A horse… What’s He Building In There? ---
**Author:** ![Ferd\_Burfel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecccb3/32.png) [@Ferd\_Burfel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferd_Burfel)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/72 "2007-12-15T18:56:29Z")
What really happened in that mine? > [@The Buoys](#): > > Timothy, Timothy, Joe was looking at you > Timothy, Timothy, God what did we do? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/73 "2007-12-15T18:57:24Z")
[QUOTE=pepperlandgirl] Not sure what you mean. The first verse is about a friend of John’s who was decapitated in car crash, and John read about it in the news (He blew his mind out in car/he hadn’t noticed that the light had changed–he blew through a red light). [/QUOTE] Was he from the House of Lords? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/74 "2007-12-15T19:01:24Z")
[QUOTE=Little Nemo] What exactly did Paul Simon do with Julio do down by the schoolyard? All we know is that it was against the law and the mama pajama saw it. Some have speculated it was sex but I doubt that would have been put on the cover of Newsweek. [/QUOTE] I always figured it was **gay** sex, which was “against the law” in many states back then – and that the Mama Pajama caught them in bed; they hung out at the schoolyard at some other time. But alternate explanations are always arguable. Really, a **lot** of Simon & Garfunkel – and later Paul Simon – songs have cryptic lyrics. I love to sing “You Can Call Me Al” whenever I can find it in the karaoke book, I’ve done it dozens of times, but don’t ask me what it means. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/75 "2007-12-15T21:47:02Z")
Who wants to ride that chrome three-wheeler? What? What is a chrome three-wheeler other than a child’s tricycle, and if so, how does that relate to Fire Lake? ---
**Author:** ![MizTina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MizTina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MizTina)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/76 "2007-12-15T22:38:27Z")
[QUOTE=Evil Captor] Who wants to ride that chrome three-wheeler? What? What is a chrome three-wheeler other than a child’s tricycle, and if so, how does that relate to Fire Lake? [/QUOTE] I imagine Bob was talking about something like [this.](http://www.netupandgo.com/hankschopshop/images/harley1200sportster.jpg) I surely do hope so anyroad. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/77 "2007-12-15T22:45:38Z")
[QUOTE=Baldwin] They found him “Guilty!” in a make believe _trial_; then the judge, if recall, slapped the sheriff on the back with a smile. So, what’s with the lights? Were they using an electric gallows? * * * Can’t believe I’m the first to say this: who shot the deputy, if it wasn’t the guy who admittedly shot the sheriff? Or was the deputy not even shot? And if not, why mention him at all? Maybe it’s supposed to be a mitigating factor: “Yeah, I shot the sheriff. But, hey – I did not shoot the deputy. Could have; gave it a pass.” [/QUOTE] possibly - but they’re arresting him “for the killing of the deputy”, so the deputy is dead. so, yeah, who did shoot him? As for Delta Dawn - is she imagining a fella? or did she have a one night stand with him 25 years ago just before he was sent to prison and is being let out now? ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/78 "2007-12-15T22:53:37Z")
[QUOTE=MizTina] I imagine Bob was talking about something like [this.](http://www.netupandgo.com/hankschopshop/images/harley1200sportster.jpg) I surely do hope so anyroad. 🙂 [/QUOTE] Seems slightly more likely than a child’s tricycle, but I don’t know how it relates to "going down to Fire Lake’ which is clearly a metaphor for a place where the living is fast, the girls are easy and life is cheap. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/79 "2007-12-15T23:37:30Z")
King Arthur, Gwenevere, & I are still wondering…_What **Do** The Simple Folk Do_? ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2007, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012/80 "2007-12-16T00:50:27Z")
[QUOTE=RealityChuck] Is Lola female or male? A case can be made for either. [/QUOTE] … I’m a man, and so is Lola. Just what are the other 45 ways to leave your lover? Why did Aneka’s Japanese boy leave? Was it something she said or did? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nothing-ever-comes-to-no-good-up-on-choctaw-ridge-mysteries-in-pop-music/430012.md?page=5)