# NYC pastor obsessed with semen, demons, and latte. Oh, my! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 17, 2015, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373 "2015-07-17T00:15:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Mr.Greenjeans](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.greenjeans/32/551_2.png) [@Mr.Greenjeans](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Greenjeans)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2015, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/21 "2015-07-17T17:27:30Z")
That was death? I thought it was just bad Chinese food. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2015, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/22 "2015-07-17T17:35:28Z")
> [@Gorsnak](#): > > I take it he’s an authority on consuming gay semen and on being gay? I \*hope \*he’s not an authority on jacking off into peoples’ latte. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2015, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/23 "2015-07-17T17:50:21Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > It would take a whole dairy farm of semen-cows to keep the whole Starbucks franchise supplied. There must be whole herds of minimum wage employees producing product at various densely packed feed lots throughout the nation. C’mon, this is Starbucks. They only use the finest, free-range, ethically-sourced gay semen. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2015, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/24 "2015-07-17T18:19:19Z")
> [@3trew](#): > > I wonder how they get the pumpkin spice flavoured semen, because I would love to have that as my superpower. You can, you can, but you have to live on nothing but pumpkin pie for about a month . . . ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2015, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/25 "2015-07-17T20:10:52Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > They are going to be using modern mechanical suction devices,… XXX machina ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2015, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/26 "2015-07-17T20:36:40Z")
We got one like that in my town. Every now and then we’d get a mass mailing or faxing going on and on about the anus and how the homosexuals should not be given any break because of the public threat involved with people getting up one another’s anuses. Come to think of it I haven’t heard of him in a while. Maybe he has fallen up his own anus. Then again the office fax has been broken for months… > [@D\_Odds](#): > > Take one for the team, visit, and report back. I would, but it’s _all the way_ up in Harlem. 🆒 Damn how did I not know about this before? ---
**Author:** ![mischievous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@mischievous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mischievous)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2015, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/27 "2015-07-17T20:37:02Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > It would take a whole dairy farm of semen-cows to keep the whole Starbucks franchise supplied. There must be whole herds of minimum wage employees producing product at various densely packed feed lots throughout the nation. Over a period of multiple generations, they would be bred for maximum productivity (measured, perhaps, in gallons per day)… Erm… sodomites aren’t known for their _breeding_, ifyaknowwhatImean. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2015, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/28 "2015-07-17T20:54:57Z")
So THIS job is why everyone is illegally immigrating from Mexico. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee7513/32.png) [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 9:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/29 "2015-07-18T09:35:55Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > So THIS job is why everyone is illegally immigrating from Mexico. To take jobs jerking off into lattes from hard working Americans? ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 9:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/30 "2015-07-18T09:53:24Z")
> [@Darth\_Panda](#): > > To take jobs jerking off into lattes from hard working Americans? It’s much cheaper; they work for pennies on the dollop. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/31 "2015-07-18T10:01:43Z")
> [@Darth\_Panda](#): > > To take jobs jerking off into lattes from hard working Americans? When they can’t hire enough hard Americans to do the work, they’ll hire hard workers wherever they can find them. ---
**Author:** ![grude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47774/32.png) [@grude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grude)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/32 "2015-07-18T12:46:28Z")
Start looking beyond the shores of the US if anti-gay pastors are entertaining to you, in places not as gay friendly they beat this loon easily! Remember the eat the doo doo guy? I like when they start describing the sex acts those gays get up to in lurid tones, but just so the congregation and radio audience can understand how disgusting it is of course.😉 ---
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/33 "2015-07-18T14:44:10Z")
> [@grude](#): > > Remember the eat the doo doo guy? I have never been more glad to not remember something. ---
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/34 "2015-07-18T14:46:28Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > **Demon Semen**??? > > BAND NAME! Their lead singer is Jack Latte. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/35 "2015-07-18T14:51:16Z")
> [@Mr.Greenjeans](#): > > That was death? I thought it was just bad Chinese food. It sure feels like death. ---
**Author:** ![grude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47774/32.png) [@grude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grude)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/36 "2015-07-18T15:29:28Z")
> [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](#): > > I have never been more glad to not remember something. Probably because I messed it up, it is eat the poo poo, apologies. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/euXQbZDwV0w/maxresdefault.jpg "EAT DA POO POO") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=euXQbZDwV0w) > [@](#): > > Anti-homosexuality Pastor Martin Ssempa, perhaps best known for his so-called “eat the poo-poo” lecture, is now being accused of promoting homosexual behavior in his home country of Uganda. > > In an article for Uganda’s First Class Magazine, writer Paul Kaliisa, of Mbarara University of Science and Technology, claims Ssempa spreads “gayism” through his lectures and gay porn screenings at churches. Under the African nation’s Anti-Homosexuality Act, which was signed into law February 2014, Ssempa could potentially get jail time for allegedly encouraging homosexual behavior – precisely what he claims to advocate against. > > Kaliisa’s harshly worded article reads, in part: > > [Ssempa] has on a number of occasions showed gay porn to members of the congregation on a projector. He explains to the Church what the homosexuals do step by step baring all and hiding nothing. Pastor Ssempa has homosexual porn on his laptop and all his gadgets. He almost seems obsessed with it. … Pastor Ssempa easily comes off as Uganda’s number one and strongest fighter homosexuality but in truth, he is Uganda’s number one promoter of the vice. He is promoting the things of these monsters and destroyers of man-kind [all sic]. > **[Anti-Gay Pastor Known For 'Eat The Poo-Poo' Lecture In Hot Water For...](https://www.huffpost.com/entry/uganda-anti-gay-martin-ssempa_n_5213571)** > > Anti-Gay Pastor Known For 'Eat The Poo-Poo' Lecture In Hot Water For Incredibly Ironic Reason ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/37 "2015-07-18T17:22:48Z")
> [@grude](#): > > Probably because I messed it up, it is eat the poo poo, apologies. > > [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=euXQbZDwV0w#t=13](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=euXQbZDwV0w#t=13) > > ['Eat The Poo-Poo' Anti-Gay Pastor In Hot Water For Ironic Reason | HuffPost Voices](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/04/25/uganda-anti-gay-martin-ssempa_n_5213571.html) Eat the poo poo and wash it down with the gay latte. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/38 "2015-07-18T18:15:41Z")
Uhhhh, I think I’ll stick with the lime in the coconut, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/39 "2015-07-18T18:28:47Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > > [@](#): > > > > “Semen flavours up the coffee, and makes you thinks you’re having a good time.” > > 😕 How the hell does he know that? ---
**Author:** ![ctnguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@ctnguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ctnguy)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2015, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373/40 "2015-07-18T20:44:54Z")
He also has [an, um, interesting theory about the Supreme Court](http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/anti-gay-preacher-supreme-court-justices-blackmailed-secret-gay-lovers): > [@](#): > > Not only did Manning spend time criticizing President Obama, but he also castigated the Supreme Court, arguing that “the Devil himself has written this opinion” on marriage equality. > > He also told host Rick Wiles that “perhaps [Justice] Kennedy and many of those who are on the Supreme Court have had sodomite relations themselves” and were being blackmailed by their secret gay lovers: “They have got to support this sodomy, they’ve got to say it or otherwise they get exposed.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nyc-pastor-obsessed-with-semen-demons-and-latte-oh-my/725373.md?page=3)