# obviously gay christian men in the closet... **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 16, 2010, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317 "2010-10-16T03:06:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Trepa\_Mayfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@Trepa\_Mayfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trepa_Mayfield)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/41 "2010-10-18T18:55:19Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Michael Bolton was in the closet for a while, despite writing songs that sounded suspiciously like those of Elton John. I don’t think gay people have a certain musical style the way you’re implying. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/42 "2010-10-18T18:57:45Z")
I don’t think most gays are no-talent assclowns, either. 😉 [sub]C’mon, it was BEGGING for that![/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/43 "2010-10-18T18:58:01Z")
> [@Monstera\_deliciosa](#): > > Catholics do occasionally use the term pastor [informally,](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pastor#Roman_Catholic.2C_Orthodox.2C_Anglican) usually in my experience, to refer to the senior priest in the parish. There’s nothing informal about it: > [@Code of Canon Law](#): > > Can. 515 ß1 A parish is a certain community of Christ’s faithful stably established within a particular Church, whose pastoral care, under the authority of the diocesan Bishop, is entrusted to a parish priest as its proper \*\*pastor. \*\* > . > . > . > Can. 519 The parish priest is the proper **pastor** of the parish entrusted to him. He exercises the pastoral care of the community entrusted to him under the authority of the diocesan Bishop, whose ministry of Christ he is called to share, so that for this community he may carry out the offices of teaching, sanctifying and ruling with the cooperation of other priests or deacons and with the assistance of lay members of Christ’s faithful, in accordance with the law. > . > . > . > Can. 529 ß1 So that he may fulfill **his office of pastor** diligently, the parish priest is to strive to know the faithful entrusted to his care. He is therefore to visit their families, sharing in their cares and anxieties and, in a special way, their sorrows, comforting them in the Lord. If in certain matters they are found wanting, he is prudently to correct them. He is to help the sick and especially the dying in great charity, solicitously restoring them with the sacraments and commending their souls to God. He is to be especially diligent in seeking out the poor, the suffering, the lonely, those who are exiled from their homeland, and those burdened with special difficulties. He is to strive also to ensure that spouses and parents are sustained in the fulfillment of their proper duties, and to foster the growth of Christian life in the family. [Here is an article](http://www.catholicherald.com/detail.html?sub_id=13278) from my diocesan newspaper announcing the appointment of pastors to new assignments in the diocese. > [@Zsofia](#): > > If you have both a confessional box and a pastor, I think you’re more confused than he is. (Unless there’s some denomination that does both that I’m completely ignorant of?) Yes, it’s called “Roman Catholicism.” A small denomination, but slated for great things, I’m certain. Catholics refer to their parish priest as a pastor, and (obviously) have confessional boxes. ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/44 "2010-10-18T19:25:22Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Why do you think a celibate life is abnormal? > > It’s certainly _atypical_, but abnormal connotes something pathological, distasteful, unhealthy, or sickening. I can’t see a reason to call voluntary celibacy abnormal that would not also apply to homosexuality. I decline to label either as such. Well, I wouldn’t read all those meanings into “abnormal”. I would say, however, that: (1) celibacy can have an unhealthy result for some people; (2) celibacy keeps people who wish to have a normal healthy sex life out of the Catholic priesthood and religious orders; and (3) the Catholic Church’s insistence on clerical celibacy is partly because the senior clergy, who make the decisions, view sex as distasteful – even though they say it is fine for married couples – perhaps because they personally have never had a normal sex life of any kind. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/45 "2010-10-18T22:10:52Z")
> [@Giles](#): > > Well, I wouldn’t read all those meanings into “abnormal”. I would say, however, that: > (1) celibacy can have an unhealthy result for some people; > (2) celibacy keeps people who wish to have a normal healthy sex life out of the Catholic priesthood and religious orders; and > (3) the Catholic Church’s insistence on clerical celibacy is partly because the senior clergy, who make the decisions, view sex as distasteful – even though they say it is fine for married couples – perhaps because they personally have never had a normal sex life of any kind. Define “normal” as used in point (2) above. ---
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2010, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/46 "2010-10-18T23:29:27Z")
All I know is my gut says “maybe”. ---
**Author:** ![monavis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e0b2c6/32.png) [@monavis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monavis)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 11:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/47 "2010-10-19T11:14:14Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > They need to know the Lord Jesus better to be set free of the closet. To rise above what is holding them back and not to be afraid of what others may think of them, knowing that God Loves them as His child. Also thoughts that many people are living under fear who are Christians, and rarely does others in Christianity help, usually in my experience pastors and the like just help keep them in bondage, such as Jesus said of the Pharisees, Luke 11:46, (or Luke 11: 37-53 for context). They cannot know the Lord Jesus better, only what some believer’s idea of the Lord Jesus, and believing in the Lord Jesus doesn’t make their sexuality go away.Why some live in guilt about their sexuality. Reading the NT some could even say the Lord Jesus was gay, according to John he refers to himself as the apostle the Jesus loved, if a person today introduced an other man as the man that loved him, people would assume it was his gay partner! If Jesus loved all his apostles then it would sound different, and would translate differently! ---
**Author:** ![monavis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e0b2c6/32.png) [@monavis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monavis)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 11:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/48 "2010-10-19T11:21:00Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Why do you think a religious life is “abnormal”? Living an abnormal life is an adult who has normal sexual drives and is expected to keep them under control for a life time, even believing or taught that mastrabation is sinful. I know several nuns and priests who either had breakdowns or became alcholic. Even thinking of sex is considered an impure thought! In that sense a religious life is unnatural. ---
**Author:** ![monavis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e0b2c6/32.png) [@monavis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monavis)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 11:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/49 "2010-10-19T11:33:09Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > Define “normal” as used in point (2) above. If I may speak for Giles; Humans are built in to have a sex drive to propgate the species, that is the norm. People sex drives are all different, some have a low drive and others more, while some may have non at all. depending on their drive for sexual expression it makes a difference in how they can handle it. Some may enter a celibate life then realize they cannot sustian it for a life time. If they can find no realease their frustrations may lead to a break down, leaving an order, or what they call sinning! ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/50 "2010-10-19T12:45:22Z")
> [@monavis](#): > > If I may speak for Giles; Humans are built in to have a sex drive to propgate the species, that is the norm. People sex drives are all different, some have a low drive and others more, while some may have non at all. depending on their drive for sexual expression it makes a difference in how they can handle it. > > Some may enter a celibate life then realize they cannot sustian it for a life time. If they can find no realease their frustrations may lead to a break down, leaving an order, or what they call sinning! I agree with this. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/51 "2010-10-19T13:04:07Z")
> [@Antinor01](#): > > I believe you’re thinking of Ray Boltz. Yes. I knew it sounded wrong, but I foolishly went ahead anyways. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2010, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/52 "2010-10-19T13:17:52Z")
> [@pedescribe](#): > > I don’t think gay people have a certain musical style the way you’re implying. I don’t either, in general. But I do think Elton John has a specific theatrical style that Boltz shares–a style that is rare amongst Christian singers. The implication is that, since Elton John has been around a while, he may have inspired Boltz. And this is unusual in the homophobic Christian music world. (The same homophobia that keeps Boltz’s songs from being played anymore.) The only actual correlation I see is the same one that makes people erroneously assume all gay men are flaming–the ones that are different are the ones you notice. ---
**Author:** ![Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/f04885/32.png) [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qin_Shi_Huangdi)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2010, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/53 "2010-10-20T01:05:44Z")
They should control their sinful behaviour especially since they as Christians know better. ---
**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2010, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/54 "2010-10-20T02:02:50Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > If you have both a confessional box and a pastor, I think you’re more confused than he is. (Unless there’s some denomination that does both that I’m completely ignorant of?) The pastor is the senior priest in a Catholic church. These days you’re lucky if your church doesn’t have to share its priest with another church but when I was a child we had a pastor and priest / assistant pastor. My grandmother’s church had five priests at the time and the pastor really ruled the roost. He was a difficult supervisor according to the others. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2010, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/55 "2010-10-20T02:18:00Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > the homophobic Christian music world …exists mostly in nontraditional contexts like Christian rock and megachurch culture. In many mainstream denominations, there is an unspoken understanding that church music directors are very often gay males. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2010, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/56 "2010-10-20T03:09:56Z")
I generally feel sorry for them. They’re set up to fail according to the usual Christian interpretation. I have a friend who my wife, my hairdresser (flamingly gay man) and several others are absolutely convinced is gay. He’s pretty stereotypical- extremely well dressed, really concerned about personal appearance, hangs out with way too many guys, etc… He’s also hyper-Christian, and doesn’t really have any friends who aren’t church friends. He even distanced himself from the rest of us, who he’d known for 10 years or so, when he started going to this evangelical church. What makes me wonder is because he rejects women out of hand for the most stupid and superficial of reasons. No woman is ever good enough for him. To wit: We’re at a Hooters with a buddy of his, and our waitress is smoking hot… hot enough to be in that year’s Hooters national calendar, as a matter of fact. She’s kind of flirting with us- my buddy looks a lot like Billy Baldwin in Backdraft, and at that point, I wasn’t too bad looking either. What does he say? “She’s got man-hands.” and then starts making Seinfeld jokes with his buddy. I was mortified. This girl was easily one of the hottest women I’d seen that year, second only to the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader I worked with for a couple of months. And what’s my buddy do? Doesn’t even play along with the flirtation; just throws out a silly reason to ignore her. Anyway, despite his stupidity, if he is gay, then I feel awful for him, because he’ll never admit it, get a boyfriend and be happy. He’ll always be single and finding reasons to not be interested in any women, and that makes me sad. It also angers me to think that a bunch of sanctimonious assholes are filling his head with a bunch of noise about whether it’s right or wrong, and not really giving him a free choice in the matter. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2010, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/57 "2010-10-20T04:36:23Z")
> [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](#): > > They should control their sinful behaviour especially since they as Christians know better. Oh just stop it already. Unless by “they” you’re talking about people who should “stop making condescending, judgmental comments about things of which, you know very little?” ---
**Author:** ![Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/f04885/32.png) [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qin_Shi_Huangdi)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2010, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/58 "2010-10-20T04:39:57Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Oh just stop it already. Unless by “they” you’re talking about people who should “stop making condescending, judgmental comments about things of which, you know very little?” Now I understand some people have a natural tendecy to homosexuality like some people do to other sins. However they should 1) know its sinful and 2) therefore control it and avoid sinful thoughts and actions. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2010, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/59 "2010-10-20T05:07:15Z")
> [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](#): > > Now I understand some people have a natural tendecy to homosexuality like some people do to other sins. However they should 1) know its sinful and 2) therefore control it and avoid sinful thoughts and actions. You really need to start thinking for yourself instead of parroting what you’ve read in a book that even you have stated should not be taken literally. You are plenty old enough to start using that brain of yours. Stop being so lazy. ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2010, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317/60 "2010-10-20T09:50:15Z")
> [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](#): > > Now I understand some people have a natural tendecy to homosexuality like some people do to other sins. However they should 1) know its sinful and 2) therefore control it and avoid sinful thoughts and actions. **Qin,** I’m beginning to suspect that you’re using the Dope to test some of the stuff you find in your head that you’re beginning to suspect just might be B.S. Good for you. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/obviously-gay-christian-men-in-the-closet/557317.md?page=4)