How about
Podcaster
Lifecoach
Realitystar
??
You win. We’re done here.
I’m surprised that nobody has mentioned Mr. and Mrs. Cashier yet.
Seemed impolitic to do so since they were just … you know … cashiered and are now sans occupation. 
How about Kevin Frycook? John Hashslinger?
Mike Reactor
Sherry Moderator
Timothy Troll
Serena Sidehustle
Barbie Blade
Sigmund Stroll
Bennie Booster
Dena Dates
Hannah Hacker
Amelia Activist
Anson Allie
Susie/ Sammy Surrogate
I’m just watching the football (soccer) female U19 European Championship final Spain-Germany, and one of the Spanish players is named Wifi. Maybe this is one of the modern surnames.
See here.
The original occupations that gave rise to the names would have been passed from father to son, but that doesn’t work now when Jeremy Javacoder’s dad would have been Carl Cobolprogrammer.
Hmmm
Hilde Javacodersdottir?
Yeah it pretty quickly gets into patronymics but you can still see the occupation
And yes I’m pretty sure that’s not how those particular patronymic names work.
Unless there was what PG Wodehouse called “some raw work at the font”. But then we’re into peculiar choices of given names.