# odd sex questions that starts with some sort of complaint about previous threads (edited title) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 22, 2015, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242 "2015-04-22T00:53:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 15
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/281 "2015-04-28T19:10:42Z")
> [@Martian Bigfoot](#): > > One of the, I guess, not entirely PC opinions I have is that it may be impossible, or at least very difficult, for a woman to rape a man. I mean, go ahead, try it. Good luck. Either you won’t be able to, or more likely, the man will be completely OK with what you’re doing. It’s entirely physically possible for a woman to rape a man. ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/282 "2015-04-28T19:16:23Z")
> [@Martian Bigfoot](#): > > it may be impossible, or at least very difficult, for a woman to rape a man. > > \ > > For a female-on-male rape, you need a motivated female, who is stronger than the male, and an unwilling male. > [@Velocity](#): > > It’s entirely physically possible for a woman to rape a man. Will an unwilling male, who is threatened, achieve an erection? If not, it may be pretty damn difficult to load that flaccid penis in there. ---
**Author:** ![Umbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Umbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Umbridge)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/283 "2015-04-28T19:20:26Z")
> [@Acsenray](#): > > You’re not describing something that would ordinarily be described as “horny.” He was behaving in a sexually suggestive manner. That doesn’t mean he felt a strong urge to have sex at that moment. Well, “horny” means “sexually aroused”. And I’m pretty sure he was sexually aroused or just excited about sex. It seemed to me that he wanted to initiate a sex act, but because he was at someone else’s house, he knew that it was not okay to have sex at someone else’s house. So, out of boredom, he asked his friend whether he could lick his friend’s fingers instead, presumably as a replacement for doing the sex act. In a conversation I had with him and the other guy, I found out that he wanted to watch the 50 Shades of Gray with his girlfriend as a way to “spice up his sex life”. I wasn’t sure if he was joking or serious, because he always laughed and had a quirky sense of humor. The other guy mentioned that he went to his senior prom with his girlfriend. In my mind, I was like, “Is he gay, bisexual, or just interested in homoerotic jokes?” ---
**Author:** ![Umbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Umbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Umbridge)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/284 "2015-04-28T19:29:09Z")
> [@Omar\_Little](#): > > Will an unwilling male, who is threatened, achieve an erection? If not, it may be pretty damn difficult to load that flaccid penis in there. An erection doesn’t have to be voluntary. It is certainly possible for a man to have an erect penis in embarrassing situations. I once heard of an embarrassing erection story in class. Penile plethysmograph is a tool used to measure bloodflow in the penis and has been used in research studies. Erection is what happens when the penis is engorged with blood through stimulation or not. It may be possible, but I am not entirely sure, that a man can actually be erect involuntarily, and the female aggressor can take advantage of him that way. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/285 "2015-04-28T19:38:08Z")
> [@Omar\_Little](#): > > Will an unwilling male, who is threatened, achieve an erection? If not, it may be pretty damn difficult to load that flaccid penis in there. Arousal does not mean consent. And rape of a man does not necessarily have to involve his penis at all. ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/286 "2015-04-28T19:40:39Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > The dubious argument that “arousal = consent.” 😉 If he’s willing, then I’m willing. ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/287 "2015-04-28T19:41:46Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > And rape of a man does not necessarily involve the penis at all. Yeah, you best keep that thing away from my bum! ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/288 "2015-04-28T20:03:06Z")
Umbridge, I think if you don’t already have the urge to get naked and have sex you will never truly understand it. An analogy to me is food, if you didn’t have the urge to eat and didn’t think food tasted good, you wouldn’t bother eating except for survival. Or your favorite book, TV show or movie. You can’t necessarily say why you like a book or TV show, but you know that you do. What people get out of sex is intimacy, lips-to-lips and skin-to-skin feels really good, especially when it is with the right person. The act of penetration feels exceptionally good, take a good massage and multiply it by 50. You don’t have to worry about thrusting, you will know what to do. Best thing to do is lose yourself in the physical and mental feelings and just go with what feels good. Who is the right person? That is sort of an intangible thing, it’s partly the person’s looks, partly personality, and maybe it is pheromones too. But you just know when you desire someone. A lot of other posters say that porn videos aren’t a good depiction of normal sex, and while I generally agree (people generally aren’t having group sex all the time), porn videos are at least a real depiction of sex. People can and do have sex like in porn videos. However a porn video is more like watching a NASCAR race to learn how to drive. The actors are pros, and everything is flashy, exaggerated, and not that realistic because there is no passion or love. But it’s still real sex. The plots (or lack thereof) are really the most unrealistic part of porn. If you can watch or think about two people having normal passionate sex and not be that interested in it, then maybe you are just an asexual person. And that’s ok. But trying to learn everything about sex through clinical/critical thinking is really counter to what sex is all about. Sex is not logical, you can’t think yourself into understanding sex. Those of us that enjoy sex desire it on a pure basic level as much as we desire food and water. The desire for sex can be as all-consuming as the thirst of a person in the desert who hasn’t drank in days. It’s biological. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/289 "2015-04-28T20:07:18Z")
> [@Umbridge](#): > > It may be possible, but I am not entirely sure, that a man can actually be erect involuntarily, and the female aggressor can take advantage of him that way. For a lot of guys from puberty to mid-20s boners are involuntary. Also fetus’ get boners. > [@](#): > > As early as 16 weeks, erectile response in male fetuses has been viewed with ultrasound (Haffner, 1999; Martinson, 1994; Parrot, 1994) [http://www.ejhs.org/volume11/Newman.htm](http://www.ejhs.org/volume11/Newman.htm) ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/290 "2015-04-28T21:29:00Z")
Aside from alcohol/drugs example already given… a woman can tie a guy up (I will grant you that I probably couldn’t restrain and rape a man with just my body; I’m not that strong), manually stimulate him to erection and slap a cock ring on him. After that, desire or not, that erection will last long enough for her to have her way. Or she can manually or orally rape him - flaccid penises are just fine for that. I absolutely agree that it’s probably nowhere near as common as men raping women, for many reasons. But it’s not even close to impossible, and accusations of rape from men should be taken just as seriously as those from women. ---
**Author:** ![Jay\_Walker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f19dbf/32.png) [@Jay\_Walker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jay_Walker)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/291 "2015-04-28T22:53:10Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > Aside from alcohol/drugs example already given… a woman can tie a guy up (I will grant you that I probably couldn’t restrain and rape a man with just my body; I’m not that strong), manually stimulate him to erection and slap a cock ring on him. After that, desire or not, that erection will last long enough for her to have her way. Or she can manually or orally rape him - flaccid penises are just fine for that. HAH!! I’d like to see you try that on me!! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2015, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/292 "2015-04-28T23:52:12Z")
> [@Martian Bigfoot](#): > > Fair point, I suppose. Although, in almost all cases, all this will get you is a willing male. > > BTW, I go both ways on that. The same thing goes for adding booze to a lady. If she ingests it on her own accord, and proceeds willingly to have consensual sex with someone that she might not have been too keen on while sober, that’s not rape. Stupid, but not rape. > > I do think getting her blind drunk on purpose in order to take advantage is rape, though. > > So, yeah, I suppose a lady could get an unwilling male blind drunk and do the same. Does it happen a lot? No way. For one thing, a desperate lady will have much simpler ways of finding a partner. For another, ladies are usually not that sexually aggressive, period. Not motivated, as I said. > > Even if a few are, most aren’t. Or she could just use a foreign object on him. ---
**Author:** ![Spud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spud/32/347_2.png) [@Spud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spud)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2015, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/293 "2015-04-29T00:12:24Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > There are plenty of places to share pornographic fiction. This is not one of them. I have a strong feeling it will be much more like slapstick comedy. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2015, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/294 "2015-04-29T01:27:59Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > It’s entirely physically possible for a woman to rape a man. I concede the point. Oh, heck, who is keeping score? I’ve changed my mind on this now. How’s that? Just for the record. 😉 I apologize for opening up that particular debate in this thread, BTW. It probably really wasn’t the place for it. Just how my foot-in-mouth disease breaks out sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2015, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/295 "2015-04-29T02:59:23Z")
> [@Steken](#): > > Mind you, to the best of my knowledge, a lack of sexual feelings might by and in itself be fine and dandy - asexuality need not, I think, necessarily be pathological - but your complete lack of understanding of human thought and human emotions, generally, _MIGHT_ (I repeat: _MIGHT_) very well be a sign of mental problems. Asexuality, by itself, is fine. I have known two people who I would confidently classify as asexual. One was a friend of one of my exes. The other is my brother. They’re both fine. Perfectly normal, sweet and… normal. They just don’t get the whole birds and the bees thing. No apparent interest in it, no need for it, no intuition for it. Just mild bemusement over what the supposedly big deal is, if anything. To be honest, if I could swap with them, maybe I would. I guess they miss out on some things, but they seem to get a whole lot of peace of mind in return. **Umbridge** , the responses you are getting in this thread questioning your mental state have nothing whatsoever to do with sex, as such. They are entirely about your unusual way of communicating. Just so you know that. ---
**Author:** ![Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ac8455/32.png) [@Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Your_Great_Darsh_Face)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2015, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/296 "2015-04-29T05:38:29Z")
> [@Martian Bigfoot](#): > > I concede the point. Oh, heck, who is keeping score? I’ve changed my mind on this now. How’s that? Just for the record. 😉 > > I apologize for opening up that particular debate in this thread, BTW. It probably really wasn’t the place for it. Just how my foot-in-mouth disease breaks out sometimes. I hope you have a Martian Bigmouth, in that case. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2015, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/297 "2015-04-29T15:46:53Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > What was that you were saying about an “invasion of privacy?” Stop invading her privacy by reading the words she typed on a public message board. ---
**Author:** ![Umbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Umbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Umbridge)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2015, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/298 "2015-04-29T23:19:14Z")
If people want sex so badly and don’t want to deal with pregnancy and find prophylactics a pain in the neck, then why can’t they just have gay sex? Gay sex = no babies. Sure, you may not be “attracted” to the same sex, but if you are desperate, then you wouldn’t be so picky, would you? ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2015, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/299 "2015-04-29T23:26:32Z")
> [@Umbridge](#): > > If people want sex so badly and don’t want to deal with pregnancy and find prophylactics a pain in the neck, then why can’t they just have gay sex? Gay sex = no babies. Sure, you may not be “attracted” to the same sex, but if you are desperate, then you wouldn’t be so picky, would you? If you have a choice of 1) small risk of pregnancy via sex with your preferred gender, or 2) zero risk of pregnancy with someone you’re not attracted to, I think most people would go with option one. Some people, of course, like the gay sex for other reasons, and that’s fine. But I think most people would prefer to fool around with their preferred gender. If pregnancy risk is too much, I assume they’d rather engage in sexual activities that don’t involve penis in vagina, before they’d have “gay sex.” There are lots of reasons to try “gay sex,” but I’d put fear of pregnancy and hassle of using prophylactics down on the list. ---
**Author:** ![mrldii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@mrldii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mrldii)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2015, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242/300 "2015-04-29T23:43:30Z")
> [@Umbridge](#): > > …As far as I know, the woman does not have to do anything during sex but stay still. By ‘do nothing but “stay still” during sex’, do you mean she should simply stop trying to run away so the sexing may commence? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242.md?page=14) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/odd-sex-questions-that-starts-with-some-sort-of-complaint-about-previous-threads-edited-title/718242.md?page=16)