# Off-board drama: how should we handle it? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 31, 2008, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426 "2008-03-31T18:49:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/141 "2008-04-03T16:40:01Z")
Could you all fight somewhere else, please? Like in a new thread? That would be super, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![bbs2k](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e495f1/32.png) [@bbs2k](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bbs2k)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/142 "2008-04-03T16:42:47Z")
[QUOTE=El Cid Viscoso] What Exit? - you really are a fucking dingbat. [/QUOTE] Please post good cites next time. I don’t see any here. And I’m still waiting on **DDG** ’s examples. And I mean that, I’m asking so that I know what can come across as annoying. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Cid\_Viscoso](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/41988e/32.png) [@El\_Cid\_Viscoso](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Cid_Viscoso)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/143 "2008-04-03T16:46:06Z")
[QUOTE=WhyNot] Not emailing a reply to a report about spam =/= making a mod’s job harder. Where do you get this stuff? [/quote] Damn girl what’s wrong with your eyeballs? If you’re at work and you receive 100 emails on the same subject, doesn’t it make your job all that harder? Spam is easy to write off. Researching the validity of a tardpit cross-pollinating insult, nsm. Again, my main problem is that some nuisance dopers will take it upon themselves to monitor external conversations and report suspicious behavior. To me that’s the essence of tattling: gaining advantage through dropping dime. Brown-nosing. Apple-polishing. Gobbling the boss’s knob. ---
**Author:** ![fluiddruid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@fluiddruid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fluiddruid)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/144 "2008-04-03T16:46:33Z")
From a mod’s perspective… [QUOTE=WhyNot] Stats? What stats? I’ve “noticed” that only some mods reply too. 'Cause I have an email address book with a few mods emails in it (from when they emailed me) and not all of them. Hardly rigorous compiling going on. [/quote] I’ll chime in here that I personally do not respond to most reported posts. I do respond to PMs and straight up emails. I take a reported post to be a “look at this”; if you want a response, or have a question, just let us know and we will get back to you. Keep in mind we’re not always at our keyboards! > [@](#): > > As I tell my kids: there’s a difference between alerting and tattling. Alerting is what you do when there might be a violation of State or Mom law or to keep someone safe. Tattling is what you do to get someone in trouble. It seems like\*\* El Cid\*\* thinks **What Exit?** is tattling - is there any evidence of that? Everything on the Dope is a public board. We have a lot of people who don’t post in the thread but still report, and generally things that are actionable tend to get multiple reports (unless we get to them quite quickly). We do have some persistent reporters who I tend to take with a grain of salt. I always read the post anyway, but the “report post” button isn’t a “I don’t like what this person said” button! That said, don’t let this dissuade you from reporting rule-violating posts. I’ve never taken action against anybody about reports that I can recall - even for really hostile and nasty “reports” - unless you’re actually spamming reported posts, report away if you want to. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/145 "2008-04-03T17:04:52Z")
[QUOTE=El Cid Viscoso] Damn girl what’s wrong with your eyeballs? If you’re at work and you receive 100 emails on the same subject, doesn’t it make your job all that harder? Spam is easy to write off. [/QUOTE] But, but…just a bit above I was told it’s assholish to post “reported post”! So how am I s’possed to signal to other posters that an offending post has been reported so the mod doesn’t GET 100 emails? 😕 I think, perhaps, I’ll take the word of every mod that’s ever weighed in on this issue that they appreciate post reporting and it makes their jobs easier. > [@](#): > > Researching the validity of a tardpit cross-pollinating insult, nsm. Oh, I agree, which is why I said all the way back on page one that I thought mods shouldn’t really go out of their way to research off board shenanigans. It was just this reporting posts in general tangent that got me defensive ('cause, as you may have guessed, I report posts sometimes.) And now, I’m outta here, since \*\*Giraffe \*\*asked us to knock it off. Link me if you need to start a new thread. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/146 "2008-04-03T17:08:10Z")
So what’s the current feeling about what to do, **Giraffe**? Leave things as they are, or change the rule? ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/147 "2008-04-03T17:52:18Z")
Well, you can see how easily a consensus was achieved in this thread. 😃 We’re considering having a Circle of Death style brawl to settle the issue, but we can’t figure out a way to choose who will represent the “change the rules” side and who will be the “leave the rules alone” fighter. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/148 "2008-04-03T17:56:38Z")
[QUOTE=MrDibble] So what’s the current feeling about what to do, **Giraffe**? Leave things as they are, or change the rule? [/QUOTE] As I mentioned earlier in the thread, I didn’t have any concrete ideas about rule changes when I started this, I mostly wanted to poll the membership to find out if you guys were chafing under the current situation and wanted to see us move more strongly toward more/less moderation of this. I haven’t really seen anything to suggest we should make major changes in how we handle things. People clearly don’t want a bunch of new rules (and neither do I), but it’s still useful to keep a separation between some other sites and this one. I think we need to keep our prohibition to linking to other sites with a history of discussion about this one which is consistently outside our forum rules, as otherwise it gives people an easy way to circumvent the forum rules. I personally don’t think we need to make mere mention of places like the snark blogs a taboo offense, provided people aren’t referencing a specific location. (And incidentally, references like “The Place That Shall Not Be Named” is no different in our minds from simply saying “the snark blog”, except that the former is more irritating.) This will probably be one of those areas where there will always be a lot of shades of grey and very little black and white, and how each situation is handled will mostly depend on the mod’s judgement rather than quantitative rules and precedent. I know some people hate those situations, especially when similar cases may be handled differently, but I think it’s unavoidable. I’m still interested in hearing people’s thoughts, so don’t take this as a final conclusion. It’s more of a mid-thread summary. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/149 "2008-04-03T18:18:42Z")
[QUOTE=fluiddruid] \ Keep in mind we’re not always at our keyboards!\ [/QUOTE] Hey, this one gnawed through her leg-irons! Somebody get the welding kit! ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/150 "2008-04-03T19:03:11Z")
Just to post to topic, I think mention of the other place by name here should not be forbidden. It seems silly to dance around it. As silly as it was when we could not use the term troll and then under the bridge dweller. It is like a loud whisper that only encourages interest in finding out what this other place is. I do agree that bringing the crap from off board, whether it be the other place or one of the other SDMB semi-related places that don’t live in the dark, should continue to be not allowed. If I recall correctly, it was off board actions on some other dope gathering place and the other place we cannot mention that had people going after \*\*Evil Captor \*\* a few years ago. That seems like the kind of stuff that I thought the rules were in place for and thus the rules were used to squelch it at the time. Am I at all correct about this or am I wrong in the details and intent? ---
**Author:** ![Eureka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/74df32/32.png) [@Eureka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eureka)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/151 "2008-04-03T19:14:58Z")
To me, a general policy that drama which starts off-board (whether in real life, or in the snarkpit, or on some other message board) should stay off-board makes sense. It won’t always be enforceable, but it is a policy which seems more likely to increase my enjoyment of this message board more than a truly hands-off anything goes policy. It also fits my general understanding of the present status quo. I’ve seen people complain before that there is something unfair about a policy which means that we only ever see one side of a fight. But when married couples squabble in the Pit, it generally ends up feeling voyeuristic to read-- as well as the rest of the problems with certain types of marital arguments. Insults which originate on some website dedicated to “One Stop Insult Shop” or worse “SDMB Insult Shop” or “Straight Dopers are Losers” should be treated the same way other insults are. Deal with it on a case to case basis. I see little or no harm in breaking links to websites which seem to exist purely for the purpose of creating insults, especially if they are focused on the SDMB. ---
**Author:** ![Omegaman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e480ec/32.png) [@Omegaman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omegaman)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/152 "2008-04-03T19:49:13Z")
[QUOTE=Giraffe] Could you all fight somewhere else, please? Like in a new thread? That would be super, thanks. [/QUOTE] What the hell? Did you lose your jackboots or something? Maybe you could invite them for tea and crumpets. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/153 "2008-04-03T20:55:45Z")
[QUOTE=Marley23] Well, you can see how easily a consensus was achieved in this thread. 😃 We’re considering having a Circle of Death style brawl to settle the issue, but we can’t figure out a way to choose who will represent the “change the rules” side and who will be the “leave the rules alone” fighter. [/QUOTE] “Who Rule Dopertown?” “Modster-Banster rule Dopertown” “Two Mod Enter! One Mod Leave! Two Mod Enter! One Mod Leave!” ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/154 "2008-04-03T22:22:57Z")
[QUOTE=WhyNot] Should I cut that out? [/QUOTE] Yes, dear. 😃 Because apparently Certain People are finding it annoying, and generally when one discovers that certain actions of one are becoming annoying to certain other people, then one wants to stop performing those annoying actions so that those Certain Other People can stop being annoyed. Or something. > [@](#): > > ! So how am I s’possed to signal to other posters that an offending post has been reported so the mod doesn’t GET 100 emails? You’re not. Clam up. ‘Cause some people are interpreting it as Junior Modding, and it’s makin’ them cranky. Last time I looked, the Internets weren’t charging by the pixel. If a mod’s Inbox gets 100 e-mails for a piece of spam instead of only one, so what? They’ve got that handsome Straight Dope coffee mug to console them for the microsecond’s inconvenience it takes to delete them. 😃 > [@bbs2k](#): > > DDG, can you show us an example of annoying “reported” instances? I’d like to make it 100% absolutely crystal clear that I don’t have a dog in this fight; I can’t remember a single instance of caring even slightly whether somebody already reported a post. So no, I don’t have a mental catalogue handy of “OMG that’s so annoying!” Post-Reported quote-unquote junior modding. But I do understand where the Certain Other People are coming from. ---
**Author:** ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2008, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/155 "2008-04-03T23:20:47Z")
I think imported jerkitude is jerkitude. I think the importer should get one of those nice little private notes, like: > [@Jackbooted Modulating Thug](#): > > We know who you are, and we know what you did. Do it again, and your butt goes outta here like a field goal. Jerks understand shit like that. Tris ---
**Author:** ![CarnalK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnalk/32/486_2.png) [@CarnalK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CarnalK)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2008, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/156 "2008-04-04T06:19:31Z")
[QUOTE=Triskadecamus] Jerks understand shit like that. [/QUOTE] 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2008, 10:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/157 "2008-04-04T10:31:28Z")
For those who are upset about the snark boards, I’d like to ask-have any of you actually _read_ that stuff? It’s pretty pathetic. Mostly teenage netspeak and talking about how so and so doper needs to get fucked up the ass, etc. ---
**Author:** ![SpaceDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spacedog/32/9932_2.png) [@SpaceDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpaceDog)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2008, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/158 "2008-04-04T11:09:37Z")
[QUOTE=Giraffe] I personally don’t think we need to make mere mention of places like the snark blogs a taboo offense, provided people aren’t referencing a specific location. (And incidentally, references like “The Place That Shall Not Be Named” is no different in our minds from simply saying “the snark blog”, except that the former is more irritating.) [/QUOTE] What really tweaks me is when someone makes a reference to the ‘other place’ and then the next twenty posts are from people wondering what ‘other place’ is. Then followed by a series of posts about how pathetic it is after they’ve found it after a helpful PM. In the meantime a perfectly reasonable thread is derailed. So, do we ban the references? Well no because … [QUOTE=WF Tomba] 4. The prohibition against even mentioning the snark site is the dumbest rule we have here, bar none. [/QUOTE] We’re about fighting ignorance. Let’s admit the boards exist (hell link to them in the FAQ if you want). Let’s allow people to say ‘snarkpit’ in threads and apply the normal rules: [ul] [li]No URLs, some of it’s borderline NSFW anyway.[/li] [li]No dragging off board shit onto here (“he called me a name on the snark board”).[/li] [li]No being a jerk. [/li][/ul] With a side of “If the snark boards upset you don’t read the damn things”. Seems fair to me. SD ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2008, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/159 "2008-04-04T11:53:28Z")
[QUOTE=Guinastasia] For those who are upset about the snark boards, I’d like to ask-have any of you actually _read_ that stuff? It’s pretty pathetic. Mostly teenage netspeak and talking about how so and so doper needs to get fucked up the ass, etc. [/QUOTE] In the greater sense of the term, doesn’t everybody need to get fucked up the ass? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2008, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426/160 "2008-04-04T13:07:12Z")
[QUOTE=Scumpup] In the greater sense of the term, doesn’t everybody need to get fucked up the ass? [/QUOTE] True, unless you’re like my uncle, who HAS no asshole. (He’s got a colostomy bag now) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/off-board-drama-how-should-we-handle-it/443426.md?page=9)