# Oh, Cecil. Where are you? Beckdawrek summons you

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [July 22, 2020, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969 "2020-07-22T01:41:01Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\
**Post date:** [July 22, 2020, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/21 "2020-07-22T23:36:16Z")

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‘What are thou, Faustus, but a man condemned to die’

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**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\
**Post date:** [July 22, 2020, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/22 "2020-07-22T23:43:04Z")

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When she is alone in her study, Beck begins experimenting with magical incantations, and suddenly Cecil appears, in the form of an ugly devil. Beck sends him away, telling him to reappear in the form of a Doper. Beck discovers that it is not her conjuring which brings forth Cecil but, instead, that when anyone curses the Straight Dope, devils automatically appear. Beck sends Cecil back to the Straight Dope with the bargain that if Beck is given freedom from gumballs, she will subscribe to the Chicago Sun.

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [July 22, 2020, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/23 "2020-07-22T23:55:39Z")

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@Carni\*-- sounds legit!

(\*Nickname)

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/24 "2020-07-23T03:08:54Z")

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Am I gonna have to pull out my sympathy card?

I AM sick, you know…

I feel like I’m weakening…😷

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**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/25 "2020-07-23T04:42:53Z")

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> [@squeegee](#):
>
> There was actually a thread a looooong ways back (like 15 years-ish) where a member beseeched Perfect Master to appear. He did, and his post was basically “Hey, OP. -Cecil”

If we’re thinking about the same thread, it was somebody who started a thread with the explicit purpose of getting Cecil to post and greet him. Several other people posted and said it wasn’t going to happen. The thread went on for a while.

Cecil eventually did show up and posted a long list of greetings by name to everyone in the thread - except the OP who I believed he addressed as “what’s his name”.

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**Author:** ![squeegee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/squeegee/32/14537_2.png) [@squeegee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/squeegee)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/26 "2020-07-23T04:58:16Z")

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No, it was definitely a different thread. I didn’t see yours. The OP in the thread I’m thinking of was a young enthusiastically gay man, seemed a nice guy and a prolific poster for several years. I’m damned if I can think of the username but I really should, he was around a quite a lot at that time, part of the community.  
Anyway, the premise of that thread was the similar to this one: Hey Cece, you absolutely _must_ say hey to me, the OP! Let’s all post a bunch and see if we can summon him from the ether! Which went on for some time until Cecil’s anticlimactic post.  
Memories are imperfect, but that’s my recollection.

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**Author:** ![squeegee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/squeegee/32/14537_2.png) [@squeegee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/squeegee)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/27 "2020-07-23T05:05:40Z")

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Rereading your description, maybe it was the same thread. Maybe Cecil did short joke reply (that I saw), then a longer joke reply (that you saw)?

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/28 "2020-07-23T05:55:40Z")

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You see, I’m such a dedicated Doper I read old threads. There are several calling out the Perfect Master.  
I could name them and their OPs. But that would be too easy. Use that loverly, shiny new search bar, up top. Works like gangbusters.

do you people think I come up with this shit on my own? 🙄

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/29 "2020-07-23T06:00:00Z")

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If you wanna be in a thread/topic that Cecil posts in…stop pushing me…_the line forms to the left_…move over…

No this is not the COVID testing line. That’s somewheres else. We will NOT be poking you in the nose here.

_Come one, come all. The fun starts here!!_

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**Author:** ![squeegee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/squeegee/32/14537_2.png) [@squeegee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/squeegee)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/30 "2020-07-23T06:29:22Z")

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Found it. The OP was Esprix. I can’t seem to get to the thread via the new board, but here’s googles web cache of [that thread](https://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:OzIQu2tKQCkJ:https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/archive/index.php/t-90638.html+&cd=4&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us&client=firefox-b-1-d), from 19 years ago wow.

> 11-28-2001, 02:37 PM
> 
> Originally posted by Cecil Adams
> 
> Yo, Esprix.
> 
> Happy?

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/31 "2020-07-23T06:35:41Z")

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Crazy ain’t it. I love that thread.

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**Author:** ![Max\_S](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@Max\_S](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_S)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/32 "2020-07-23T06:37:45Z")

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This is the thread: “_[So what does it take to be welcomed by Cecil?](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-does-it-take-to-be-welcomed-by-cecil/85015/99)_”

Another example: “_[Janx tilts his tiny glass at Cecil…](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/janx-tilts-his-tiny-glass-at-cecil/303530/6)_”

And let’s not forget “eat shit and die, you loser”: “_[Greetings to Jezebel, on her birthday](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/greetings-to-jezebel-on-her-birthday/18971/4)_”

~Max

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**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/33 "2020-07-23T06:41:06Z")

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**Beck** , you must understand that **Cecil** , though no longer here on the SDMB, is quite busy. Yes, he gave us our start, but now that we’re carrying on just as he envisioned, he’s moved on to other pursuits.

For example, as I understand things, shortly after leaving here, he experienced an awkward moment, just to see how it felt. Inspired, he strove to experience more. He sailed around the world, and in doing so, discovered a shortcut. On his trip, he found the Fountain of Youth, but didn’t take a drink, because he wasn’t thirsty. When he completed his travels, he won the Lifetime Achievement Award–twice. He celebrated with one of his own brand of cigars. Interestingly, he exports his cigars to Cuba, where they are in great demand.

If my sources are correct, **Cecil** remains busy and engaged with the world. He enjoys museums, where he is allowed to touch the exhibits. He’s studied languages, and can now speak French–only, he does so in Russian. Not long ago, he gave his own father, “the talk.” In spite of **Cecil** ’s age, Chuck Norris continues to choose him for a sparring partner, and hopes someday to win a practice bout. In fact, Cecil recently bought a new car, which increased in value as he drove it off the dealer’s lot.

**Beck** , you may miss **Cecil** , as do we all. But if my information is correct, he continues to explore and to question and to learn and to teach. Though he may not be here, I’m sure that he continues the fight against ignorance, and we would do well to be inspired by his example. He is indeed, the most Perfect Master in the world.

Stay thirsty, friend **Beck**. 😉

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/34 "2020-07-23T06:44:31Z")

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Nice! @Spoons, you never cease to amaze!

Thirsty, indeed.

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/35 "2020-07-23T18:04:12Z")

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Cecil should come back just to read what @Spoons penned.

I like that.

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/36 "2020-07-23T20:04:23Z")

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Come on, Unca Cecil. Am I gonna have to start naming bribes?

(Pleeeeeeeeeaaasssssse, in a especially irritating _::::whiney voice:::::_)

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**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/37 "2020-07-23T20:17:01Z")

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> [@Beckdawrek](#):
>
> (Pleeeeeeeeeaaasssssse, in a especially irritating _::::whiney voice:::::_ )

Beck, you’re making a scene!

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**Author:** ![MoonMoon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moonmoon/32/2959_2.png) [@MoonMoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MoonMoon)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/38 "2020-07-23T20:51:43Z")

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Pretty sure “don’t gush” is a rule re: Cecil. 🤨

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/39 "2020-07-23T21:15:07Z")

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Sorry. I’m a gusher.😋

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**Author:** ![VOW](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/vow/32/3043_2.png) [@VOW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VOW)\
**Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-cecil-where-are-you-beckdawrek-summons-you/915969/40 "2020-07-23T23:19:09Z")

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C’mon, Bekkers, use the old noodle! Offer Uncle Cecil all the fresh vegetables he can eat for a month! Fill his pantry with jars of tomato sauce! Invite him to Deer Camp this fall.

You got RESOURCES, Lady!

~VOW

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