# Oh, did I hurt your widdle feelings? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 29, 2001, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364 "2001-10-29T20:36:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2001, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/1 "2001-10-29T20:36:11Z")
You said, “That shot must have been a fiasco”. So I said, “What’s wrong with it?” You said, “Nothing; it just must have been a fiasco getting the fire to burn just right, not too much not too little, and at the right time of day.” I said, “Well is that what it’s supposed to look like?” You blew up and said something, I don’t remember, and I said, “Well, you said ‘fiasco’. Fiasco means when something gets so messed up it’s ultimately not worth the time it took to screw it up. Clusterfuck, in other words.” You said, “Well you know what? I don’t care! I’m going to keep saying it that way! I swear, you’re the only person I know who does that!” Bite my shiny metal ass. If you’re using a word that has the complete opposite of the meaning you’re trying to express, and I rightfully don’t understand what you’re getting at and ask for clarification, I’m going to inform you so you don’t keep using the wrong word! So other people can understand you! How is it an insult? ---
**Author:** ![Daowajan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@Daowajan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daowajan)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2001, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/2 "2001-10-29T20:40:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rilchiam \* > \*\* > Bite my shiny metal ass. \*\* YEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!! ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2001, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/3 "2001-10-29T20:45:56Z")
> [@](#): > > ‘When I use a word,’ Humpty Dumpty said, in a rather scornful tone,’ it means just what I choose it to mean, neither more nor less.’ > > ‘The question is,’ said Alice, ‘whether you can make words mean so many different things.’ > > ‘The question is,’ said Humpty Dumpty, ‘which is to be master - that’s all.’ _Through the Looking Glass_ ---
**Author:** ![Kamandi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5daacb/32.png) [@Kamandi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamandi)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2001, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/4 "2001-10-29T21:07:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Daowajan \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Rilchiam \* > > \*\* > > Bite my shiny metal ass. \*\* > > YEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!! \*\* Bender - Futurama. Nice use of the line, **Rilchiam**. By the way, the exact same thing happens when I ask my wife to clarify a word I suspect she’s used incorrectly. I’ve learned not to ask for clarification. ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2001, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/5 "2001-10-29T22:56:33Z")
So let me get this straight, you were out starting fires? ---
**Author:** ![Mac\_Guffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Mac\_Guffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mac_Guffin)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2001, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/6 "2001-10-29T23:07:55Z")
Back when I was younger, I attended a fly-by-night radio school put on by a local DJ. He had the habit of using the word “detrement” repeatedly. However he would use it in place of “benefit”. Or at least I think he was doing that. He would say things like’ “This class will be a huge detrement to your radio career.” Thinking back, he may have been right. He was plenty embarrased when a couple of us in his class pointed out his error. “I do not think that word means what you think it means.” ---
**Author:** ![december](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/838e76/32.png) [@december](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/december)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2001, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/7 "2001-10-29T23:20:16Z")
If \*\*Rilchiam \*\* is a male and “you” happens to be his wife, then I recommend the useful phrase “Yes, dear.” ---
**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2001, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/8 "2001-10-29T23:23:17Z")
It’s inevitable, that people will do that. Out of utter confusion. When a person is using the wrong word, people who DO understand what it means will ask for clarification. This defensive guy is just trying to put off the inevitable. Someone else (and then someone else, and yet another person) will be rightly confused when he uses that word incorrectly. It’ll never end! I wonder how long he’ll hold out before finally conceding that he’s using it incorrectly. ---
**Author:** ![Syzygy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Syzygy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syzygy)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2001, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/9 "2001-10-29T23:23:31Z")
May I add a :rolleyes: to that comment. Thanks. I had a professor who constantly used “implicit” when he meant “explicit”, or vice versa. It was infuriating, as we couldn’t correct him for fear of a lower grade. ---
**Author:** ![Syzygy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Syzygy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syzygy)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2001, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/10 "2001-10-29T23:24:35Z")
I meant **december** ’s comment, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2001, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/11 "2001-10-29T23:32:02Z")
I understand the embarrassment at being caught using a word incorrectly - but not the defensive or angry reaction. The only thing you can do is suck it up, admit you’re (for the moment) an idiot, and move on. To this day I recall burning shame, distress, and horror when, in seventh grade, I described something as the EPI-tome of perfection, and the teacher corrected me, telling me it was pronounced e-PIT-toe-me. Sheesh. And in ninth grade, talking about something related to teen angst, I used the word ennui, pronouncing it EN-you-I. I was an idiot. As long as we’re on the subject, **particlewill** - I think the word you’re describing is spelled _detriment_. - Rick ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2001, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/12 "2001-10-30T00:01:49Z")
this whole thread is emphatic. ---
**Author:** ![Mac\_Guffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2bfe46/32.png) [@Mac\_Guffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mac_Guffin)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2001, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/13 "2001-10-30T00:14:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bricker \* > \*\* > As long as we’re on the subject, **particlewill** - I think the word you’re describing is spelled _detriment_. > > - Rick \*\* Ya know, I spelled it that way at first but it just didn’t look right for some reason. I really need to get a word proccesing program with spell check. I really do. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2001, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/14 "2001-10-30T00:30:54Z")
Gah! I can’t believe I forgot to check the e-mail option! No, I’m female, and the person using “fiasco” was Friend. He wanted to borrow something, and I brought it over when he was watching the last five minutes of a movie, which involved a fire. He wasn’t truly offended; I think his defensiveness was a front for embarrassment. Amazingly, today’s [Big Nate](http://www.unitedmedia.com/comics/bignate/index.html) includes the proper use of “fiasco”! I sent it to him in e-mail. We’ll see. Good anecdotes, all! ---
**Author:** ![peepthis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9d8465/32.png) [@peepthis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peepthis)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2001, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/15 "2001-10-30T00:39:50Z")
What are you talking about? Embiggen is a perfectly cromulent word. ---
**Author:** ![amarinth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@amarinth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amarinth)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2001, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/16 "2001-10-30T00:56:39Z")
My former boss used to do that. “I’d like to make sure you guys do this clemently, not ambiguously.” 25% of the time, this was ok, we’d just nod and get the job done - the other 75% of the time he’d decide to quiz us “So, how do you do this clemently?” And we’d have no idea. Mostly because there was no way to do the job clemently (or whatever adverb or phrase he’d chosen to use totally incorrectly that day.) So, there were a lot of blank stares and incorrect guesses followed by him giving “helpful leaderly guidance” into how he wanted the job done and him thinking that we obviously needed him - or we’d be lost. Even worse, he wasn’t consistent. So, today at 10, “clement” may mean one thing, but at 3, it may mean something different, and the next day, it could have either of the two meanings or take on a third. The fear of being fired does keep you from making corrections, so sometimes, you’ve just got to deal. ---
**Author:** ![Dale\_The\_Bold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/41988e/32.png) [@Dale\_The\_Bold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dale_The_Bold)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2001, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/17 "2001-10-30T01:09:33Z")
I had a roommate who, if you were telling him he did something wrong, he’d remark “why are you condoning me? it’s not my fault!” I wonder if he ever noticed my smirk. ---
**Author:** ![Felinecare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Felinecare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Felinecare)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2001, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/18 "2001-10-30T01:14:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by amarinth \* > **"So, how do you do this clemently?" And we’d have no idea.** Guess it means you only work when the weather is nice. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2001, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/19 "2001-10-30T01:44:32Z")
Inclement is one of those words that sounds like it ought to have an opposite - ‘clement’ - but there’s no such word. I like those - you never hear about kempt hair, sung heros, or being corrigible. - Rick ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2001, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364/20 "2001-10-30T03:20:43Z")
clem\*ent (adjective) [Middle English, from Latin clement-, clemens] First appeared 15th Century 1 : inclined to be merciful : LENIENT \ 2 : MILD \<~ weather for November\> – clem_ent_ly (adverb) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-did-i-hurt-your-widdle-feelings/90364.md?page=2)