# Oh gawd, it hurts!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-gawd-it-hurts/748374>\
**Category:** Factual Questions\
**Created:** [March 9, 2016, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-gawd-it-hurts/748374 "2016-03-09T04:56:21Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 2\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Cardboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Cardboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardboard)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2016, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-gawd-it-hurts/748374/1 "2016-03-09T04:56:21Z")

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I don’t know where to put this, exactly.

But for whatever reason, my body has decided to start making turds of enormous girth and it’s causing my anal region to expand to diameters greater than anything I’ve previously experience. It caused a fissure and it hurts. What can I do to remedy this?

Also, slightly related:

How do anal fissures not get infected? I mean, poop is rubbing directly against them.

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**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2016, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-gawd-it-hurts/748374/2 "2016-03-09T04:58:28Z")

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> [@Cardboard](#):
>
> I don’t know where to put this, exactly.
> 
> But for whatever reason, my body has decided to start making turds of enormous girth and it’s causing my anal region to expand to diameters greater than anything I’ve previously experience. It caused a fissure and it hurts. What can I do to remedy this?
> 
> Also, slightly related:
> 
> How do anal fissures not get infected? I mean, poop is rubbing directly against them.

**Moderator Warning**

Cardboard, you’ve been told not to start trolling threads like this. This is an official warning. Do not do this again. This is closed.

Colibri  
General Questions Moderator