# Oh Midwest, what won't you turn into a salad **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 14, 2009, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045 "2009-04-14T07:04:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/21 "2009-04-14T16:42:45Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > No mention of Chicago style pizza? you can get that in London… (and it is heard of here, of course). That actually was invented in Chicago. Pizzeria Uno is a nationwide chain, but the original (and its sister restaurant, Pizzeria Due) are still around. ---
**Author:** ![Zabali\_Clawbane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ecd19e/32.png) [@Zabali\_Clawbane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zabali_Clawbane)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/22 "2009-04-14T16:44:58Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Me neither. But there’s a place in Taunton, MA that has been serving them up since two days before God was born. I was once out at a different Chinese place with a bunch of people from Taunton. They were shocked – Electrified, I tells ya! – that the place we were at didn’t offer the sandwich. They were pretty certain that it was invented in Beijing some 500 years ago, right along with fortune cookies and lobster sauce. > > When I decided I was going to order mushi, they all looked disgusted. Surely something with a name like that had to be gross, right? > > Gourmands they were not. Sheesh! I know chow mein isn’t precisely traditional, but it isn’t too bad. Tangent: I’ve had duck soup at a noodle shop that was quite good. The place had dried pepper on the tables, (fresh, not stale, it gave the soup a goodly kick) and a wide selection of noodle dishes. I’d love to go back and eat there again sometime. ---
**Author:** ![BetsQ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/fbc32d/32.png) [@BetsQ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BetsQ)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/23 "2009-04-14T16:53:54Z")
A co-worker once mentioned to me that you can learn a lot about someone’s social class position by how many dishes with jello and/or marshmallows were on the Thanksgiving menu. I immediately reassessed my social standing down a few notches. Mainstays at home for family dinners were “bumpy jello” - red jello made with apple sauce. At more formal occasions, we often had ambrosia (yum - mandarin oranges, pineapples, coconut, and marshmallows, plus something runny) or cranberry salad (yuck - cranberries, red jello, apple chunks, nuts, maybe something else). Dessert often included pretzel salad, which was a layered thing with crushed pretzels on the bottoms, jello in the middle, and whipped cream on the top. And then, my all time favorite, the Mississippi mud cake: a fudgy/brownie-like cake topped with a layer of marshmallows and drizzled with fudge sauce. ---
**Author:** ![Indyellen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/indyellen/32/4176_2.png) [@Indyellen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indyellen)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/24 "2009-04-14T17:00:03Z")
There’s always Watergate Salad, which consists of Cool Whip, pistachio flavored pudding (just the mix), canned crushed pineapple, chopped walnuts or pecans, sliced marachino cherries, and mini marshmallows. Anyway, it’s actually VERY tasty, if somewhat visually unappealing. We call it “the green stuff”. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/25 "2009-04-14T17:08:07Z")
> [@BetsQ](#): > > A co-worker once mentioned to me that you can learn a lot about someone’s social class position by how many dishes with jello and/or marshmallows were on the Thanksgiving menu. I immediately reassessed my social standing down a few notches. I make Tday dinner more or less exactly like my mother does, but I’ve evicted the marshmallows and replaced them with cognac. Now I’ve got class coming out of my nutsack. ---
**Author:** ![apollonia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2bfe46/32.png) [@apollonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/apollonia)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/26 "2009-04-14T18:38:14Z")
My aunt makes the world’s most unbelievably delicious Jello concoction–although in our family, it’s called “pretzel Jello,” which sounds vaguely disgusting. It has a crushed pretzel basis, topped with Cool Whip and cream cheese mixed all together, topped with strawberry Jell-O with strawberry chunks in it. Delicious. At Christmas everyone politely elbows one another out of the way to get a shovelful of Pretzel Jello on their dessert plate. Nothing better. Although in our banana pudding, we use banana pudding, not vanilla. Banana slices, Nilla wafers, atomic yellow pudding, done. If you have a nice glass bowl and a LOT of time on your hands, you can make some very intricate patterns with this dish. It’s very impressive on the potluck table. Jello molds are also very impressive. A neighbour lady I used to know, every Christmas she always made a green jello salad in the shape of a Christmas tree, then festooned the top of it with colorful mini-marshmallows where the ornaments would be. Good eating. **Indyellen** , my friend’s family makes that, except instead of calling it Watergate pudding they call it “green ambrosia.” Which is just ridiculous, because everyone knows ambrosia is oranges and pineapple and yogurt dressing and marshmallows and coconut mixed all together and served in a big opaque bowl. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/27 "2009-04-14T18:41:34Z")
I think I’m going to be sick. YUCK! But my mother did make one thing that I used to love. She’d make cherry jello, and before it set she’d marble in vanilla pudding. I thought it was quite good. ---
**Author:** ![Zeriel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/58956e/32.png) [@Zeriel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeriel)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/28 "2009-04-14T18:56:48Z")
> [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#): > > Wierdest food I’ve ever eaten in a restaurant: [Horseshoes](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Horseshoe_sandwich). Basically unknown outside of Springfield, IL. That’s remarkably similar to the [Primanti Bro’s](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Primanti) sandwich in Pittsburgh, if you replace the cheese with coleslaw and generally make it “your choice of side dishes that we cram on there”. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/29 "2009-04-14T19:02:39Z")
> [@BetsQ](#): > > A co-worker once mentioned to me that you can learn a lot about someone’s social class position by how many dishes with jello and/or marshmallows were on the Thanksgiving menu. I immediately reassessed my social standing down a few notches. Good, I’m still moving up in the class hierarchy. My parents ate Jello salads, but I don’t. ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/30 "2009-04-14T19:02:49Z")
I’ve never been a Jello fan. Nowadays I associate it with being sick, like chicken noodle soup and saltines. My mother went through a phase when I was growing up, though. The most memorable dish was “Ribbon Jello.” This was mold with thin layers alternating however many colors of Jello there are with layers of Jello mixed with, I think, cream cheese and mayonnaise. It was incredibly labor intensive for a Jello dish and took up the whole kitchen for a few hours. She made it when she wanted to make a big splash at the church potluck. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/31 "2009-04-14T19:19:32Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > I think I’m going to be sick. YUCK! > > But my mother did make one thing that I used to love. She’d make cherry jello, and before it set she’d marble in vanilla pudding. I thought it was quite good. That sounds kind of good–I’d prefer orange Jello, though. Anyone remember Jello 1-2-3? I loved that stuff as a kid… That and regular plain old Jello (for when we were sick) are my only Jello memories (although we used to eat dried Jello right out of the box, dipping wet fingers in, at our swim meets when I was a kid). I did not grow up with Jello salad. I count this a good thing… ---
**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/32 "2009-04-14T19:25:27Z")
> [@apollonia](#): > > My aunt makes the world’s most unbelievably delicious Jello concoction–although in our family, it’s called “pretzel Jello,” which sounds vaguely disgusting. It has a crushed pretzel basis, topped with Cool Whip and cream cheese mixed all together, topped with strawberry Jell-O with strawberry chunks in it. Delicious. At Christmas everyone politely elbows one another out of the way to get a shovelful of Pretzel Jello on their dessert plate. Nothing better. I love this, but you and BetsQ left out the best part. You fry the pretzels in butter first to form a crust. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/33 "2009-04-14T19:27:29Z")
> [@Munch](#): > > Oh my gosh - my mom made that! And actually, it was delicious. A “salad” only in the sense that it was served alongside your meal, and no unhealthier than fruit cocktail in heavy syrup. Er, I’d debate that - the fruit cocktail at least is non-fat. Honestly, I’d never heard of a single thing the OP listed. I guess we didn’t go to too many potlucks when I was growing up. ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/34 "2009-04-14T19:49:58Z")
Alyson Hannigan’s character Lily, who lives in NYC, went back to St Cloud, MN with her boyfriend on _How I Met Your Mother_… > [@](#): > > Mrs. Ericksen: Now that you’re going to be a Mrs. Ericksen, I’m going to let you in on a secret recipe. The Ericksen family seven-layer salad. > Lily: Seven-layer salad? > (Mrs. Ericksen hands Lily paper with recipe on it) > Lily: Six cups of mayonnaise? That can’t be right. > Mrs. Ericksen: Oh no, dear, sixteen cups. > (Mrs. Ericksen places a large glass cylinder next to Lily) > Mrs. Ericksen: Mayo’s in that cabinet. > > _later_ > > Lily: OK, I finished the gummy bear layer of the salad. What’s next? > (Lily looks at recipe) > Lily: Potato chips. A [musical my friend was in](http://www.isomusical.com/) was a bout a bunch of people moving from Cleveland to San Francisco, and one of the lyrics a character sings to her mom is “marshmallows just don’t belong in a salad.” ---
**Author:** ![apollonia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2bfe46/32.png) [@apollonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/apollonia)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/35 "2009-04-14T20:04:01Z")
> [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](#): > > I love this, but you and BetsQ left out the best part. You fry the pretzels in butter first to form a crust. Fried? Really? We crush up the pretzels and mix them with butter and bake them for a few minutes. ---
**Author:** ![Stealth\_Potato](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Stealth\_Potato](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stealth_Potato)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/36 "2009-04-14T20:16:53Z")
> [@mattomic](#): > > Here’s my favourite: [Snickers salad,](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snickers_salad) a gourmet delight of Snickers bars, Cool Whip and apple slices (y’know - the healthy part) that apparently passes as a “salad”. Looks like a slimy whiteish mess of a heart attack in waiting. From the Wikipedia article: “It is sometimes included in church cookbooks and is also served at funerals.” I think they mean “served _immediately before_ a funeral.” Yours. If you eat it. 😛 Really. Snickers Bars are quite disgusting enough on their own, without the assistance of Cool Whip. ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Tonya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/4491bb/32.png) [@Queen\_Tonya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Tonya)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/37 "2009-04-14T20:40:56Z")
Yep, I’m a Midwesterner all right, I recognize every single thing in this thread. I bet the one you’re thinking of was something like [this](http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2309/2144284653_70cf686769.jpg?v=0), **cher3**? I love how crooked that one is, but they rotated between layers to make it all better. 😃 We make it with a layer of lime w/crushed pineapple, then a layer of yellow w/cream cheese, then whatever flavor red on top, served with the obligatory whipped cream on the side. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/38 "2009-04-14T20:41:07Z")
> [@Stealth\_Potato](#): > > From the Wikipedia article: “It is sometimes included in church cookbooks and is also served at funerals.” I think they mean “served _immediately before_ a funeral.” Yours. If you eat it. 😛 Why is it that church basements consistently commit the most heinous culinary crimes? I have no memory of eating anything in a church (other than the wine) that was remotely edible in any form. Not that I go to church much anymore. A few years ago I went to a funeral, and it was a sad, sad event. The deceased was a lovely person and we all hated to see her go. Why, then, did the food have to suck ass? There were two choices: Tuna salad sandwiches and egg salad sandwiches. Those are not food. Those are excuses to throw away bread. ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Tonya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/4491bb/32.png) [@Queen\_Tonya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Tonya)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/39 "2009-04-14T20:49:44Z")
Well, outlaw drinking, swearing, dancing, gambling, fornicating and smoking and alls you got left is overeating, eh? ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2009, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045/40 "2009-04-14T20:50:21Z")
Generally like that, except it had many more layers. If she was feeling really fancy, she’d make it in some kind of mold. The moment it was to be released was always very tense. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/oh-midwest-what-wont-you-turn-into-a-salad/493045.md?page=3)